January 20, 2005
Madre De Dios
By Stacy
Curse William Hung, curse him for the crap-tastic retarded gravy train he is. He's the only reason I can come up with for the preponderance of FREAKS that are being allowed through this year. Surely they do pre-screening, do they not? If not, why hasn't Simon opened fire with an AK yet?
I agree with Michele, the ring-hocking woman I will watch just to savor the salty sweetness of her UTTER DEFEAT. Bleh.
From Wednesday night, seriously pleased with Ozzie Smith's kid, how he's actually able to sing and not the usual in-your-face talentless dreck. Well, I was pleased until he spoke of how his advancement was a paean to all those in St. Louis who were "held back". Held back? Is there a fascist dictatorship in the midwest we are unaware of? No, you say? Quel surprise.
The cruise ship kid was pitiful, wasn't he? Another case where his family has told him all his life what a golden god he is, only to have his hopes dashed by the cruel Brit.
And the music teacher who squeaked through, weeping HUGE crocodile tears over her student's failure to get a pass. ACT-ing! Ah well, it will probably work out for the best. Did anyone else get totally squicked when he said they were going to have lots of "fun" in Hollywood? *shudder*
Hurrah for the farm girl! Genuinely cute, and totally did justice to that Bonnie Raitt song.
To the excruciatingly short girl/boy who came into the audition room singing: Pick a gender, wipe some of that self-love off, and tell yo momma that you ain't all that, chips not included.
I tell you people right now, Simon is my favorite person on this benighted show. He's tired, he's cranky, he's bored with mediocrity. And I am with him six thousand percent. I look forward to the day he vaults over the table, albeit in a stodgy British sort of way, and mic-whips some smart mouthed little punk who believes his rendition of WHATEVER is the best thing since Stairway.
It's going to be a LONG season, stock up on the scotch now, people.
didn't you know? St. Louis is just chock full of oppression, especially with kids with famous fathers. yeah, the kid could sing, but damn, stop making yourself more important than you really are. you made it to Hollywood. that's just the first step. you make it to the show, then you can champion the oppressed. and let the fungus grow back on your shower shoes. until then, you're just another idol wannabe.
i don't see why people hate Simon so much. sure, he's brutal, but he's honest. i mean, we've all seen the consequences of telling someone they're a good singer just to spare their feelings... hello, Mary.
and, by far, Paula was the most cruel last night, telling that poor 16 yr old girl that she should do voiceover work. yeah, tell her she could be kid voice on Rugrats; that'll make her feel better. sheesh!
Posted by: mikey at January 20, 2005 01:38 PM
The farm girl? Oklahoman. :-)
Posted by: robyn at January 20, 2005 01:44 PM
Robyn - Hah! Of course she is.
Mikey - That was very well done on Paula's part, I thought. She's coming along nicely. :)
Posted by: Sekimori at January 20, 2005 01:46 PM
who came into the audition room singing
I tried this in a job interview once. It didn't work so well. Well, maybe it would have if I hadn't chosen Wu Tang's "Shame on a Ni**a."
Posted by: Hubris at January 20, 2005 02:10 PM
I hated that girl that came in singing. I want her to lose in a humiliating, ego crushing way.
The teacher/student combo? Brrrrrr.
Posted by: michele at January 20, 2005 02:16 PM
It's good teevee, is the thing. The do pre-screen, then they let the judges see both the ones that have some talent and the ones that most obviously and outrageously don't. Woe betide the normal, for ye shall be cast out of pre-screening and senteth home.
Posted by: Matt at January 20, 2005 02:21 PM
i auditioned for the second season of american idol. there, i said it......really, though, the processs is designed to let the mary's and the william hung's through for a reason. simon, paula, and randy crack their knuckles before each season and look over their new list of insults and prepare for a day half filled with loonies and half filled with those with true talent. it's a ratings deal, and most people know and understand that.....i do, but i have a hard time swallowing the fact that mary, "brian kcknight", and ms. chipmunk voice (the he/she) made it one level past me. i'll survive...i'm a faithful viewer, still. i'm still waiting for someone to knock my socks off so far this season, though. so far it's so-so.
Posted by: tiffany at January 20, 2005 02:43 PM
Was the farm girl a cute brunette with freckles? Did 'Something To Talk About'? I saw her on the local news before the show.
I really need a tivo.
Posted by: Tanya at January 20, 2005 04:48 PM
Was the "my family has always told me I'm a great singer" theme hit so strongly the previous seasons? I don't remember it that way. This year it seems like every other shocked sucky singer argues that their family insists they have a golden voice.
Posted by: Doug at January 21, 2005 05:20 PM