So today we went to the daughter's srping play - the high school production of Oklahoma!
During intermission, she sends me a text message -she has a headache and needs some Excedrin. I meet her out in the hallway and give her two Excedrin Migraine. Like me, she has a bit of a problem getting pills down but she says she'll manage to take them (I chew them).
So about five minutes later, I'm in my seat and I get a text message from her:
"Don't worry mom, Jessie taught me how to swallow!"
I couldn't help myself. I laughed. Hard.
I'm cracking up with my mother thinking about how pure and innocent my daughter is that she doesn't realize the joke she made.
Ten seconds later I get a text message that just says "LOL!"
[Thank you to Coop for sending me this link]
I believe it's never too early to start preparing for great national holidays. It takes time and effort to put together everything you need to make a holiday special. That is why you see Christmas decorations lining the shelves of Target in September. It's why the matzoh ball mix is on prominent display in the supermarket well before Rosh Hashana. And it's why I'm giving you the heads up on a holiday that takes place in June.
That's right. Mark your calendars. It's a day celebrating the greatest speed metal band to ever grace this planet. The National Day of Slayer.
There are several ways listed on the site to participate in this day. While most of them seem like sound ideas, I'd skip the "Kill the neighbor's dog and blame it on Slayer" and go straight to killing the neighbor instead.
They also recommend taking the day off of work to listen to Slayer, but I prefer to set up a huge speaker system in my office and subject my fellow employees to a full day of the new Slayer album, which happens to debut that very day, June 6. Get it? June 6, 2006? 6/6/06? 666? Oh yea, we're evil. I'm so evil I shit pentagrams.
So here's your chance, Slayer fans. Your one true moment to shine, to spread the gospel of Kerry King, to preach the word of Jeff Hanneman, etc., etc. Go out and get one of those porcupine looking bracelets like King used to wear back in the day. Grow your hair long. Practice your pentagram drawing skills. Carve a 666 into your skull. Say things like "metal up your ass" to your grandmother while blasting Necrophobic in her ear.
I'm pretty sure that yesterday when I drove through the Long Island ghetto where I work blasting Raining Blood, it caused some people on the street to spontaneously combust, and I think at least one small child grew devil horns. Oh yea, think of the children, people. Force your kids to listen to Slayer on June 6th. It's good for them to learn early on about necrophelia and death and war and satan and all that good stuff. How charming would it be to gather around the table for the Slayer sacrificial dinner and have the kiddies recite:
Ambushed by the spray of lead
Count the bullet holes in your head.
Offspring sent out to cry,
Living mandatory suicide.
That's some quality holiday memories right there.
I'll be sure to remind you more of this important day as the holiday nears. Meanwhile, I've included some Slayer music for your listening pleasure. Please feel free to use it to spread the word of this special day. Like it says on the official site: National holidays in America aren't just about celebrating; they're about forcing it upon non-participants.
My cries of Viva La Nintendo Revolution are no more. Word on the net is that the name of the new console is....wii.
While the code-name "Revolution" expressed our direction, Wii represents the answer.
Wii will break down that wall that separates video game players from everybody else.
And still more clarification:Wii has a distinctive "ii" spelling that symbolizes both the unique controllers and the image of people gathering to play. ... And together Wii will change everything.
After all the good hype this game is getting, after all the arugments I've had with Xbox fanboys and PS lovers - arguments I've won, by the way - about how this console is going to be the greatest thing to happen to gaming, after all the great news about every aspect of the revolution - this is what we end up with. Was the marketing department smoking crack? Asleep? Filled with 13 yr old kids who had to pee? Nintendo has taken a huge step backward with this. Huge. This is the most asinine naming of an anticipated thing since The Phantom Menace.
Yea, the console will still be awesome. But come on, I just can't imagine a conversation in which I tell someone I'm going to hang out at home and play with my Nintendo wii.
Guaranteed the Xbox legion are lining up the piss/penis jokes already.
Update: more ffrom ZDnet:
The idea behind the name--which is pronounced "we"--is that it will invoke the feeling of cooperative play that comes when people play games together. Further, Nintendo said, the written name is meant to visually conjure up the image of two people standing together. "The goal is we are a highly innovative company and we want the name to speak to that innovation and uniqueness," said Perrin Kaplan, Nintendo's vice president of marketing and corporate affairs. "If you were to look at (the name of the controller) visually, the point isn't just how you pronounce it, but it symbolizes the controllers, which are one of the most innovative and unique parts of the system.
the written name is meant to visually conjure up the image of two people standing together.
Yea, standing in line at a glory hole on the New Jersey Turnpike, maybe.
Oh yea, I'm gonna get all Beavis on this wee-wee thing.
And thus far, my favorite headlines submitted to fark:
Nintendo Wii? Not to be outdone, Sony announces the GayStation 3
Nintendo, having almost won the upcoming game console primaries, pulls a Howard Dean at the last minute: Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
"I played with my Wii all night long and boy is my arm tired" - Nintendo's new console named
They said it couldn't be done. Nintendo researchers invent console system name gayer than "DreamCast"
Nintendo Revolution renamed "Wii" rejecting the better title of Universally Fun Innovation Arcade
Nintendo tries to capture lucrative dolphin market with new name for Revolution
Nintendo, realizing it has lost the gaming console race, has joined france and surrendered. Wii Oui
GOT DAMN MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES ON A WII!
Wii will, Wii will ROCK YOU!
5. "Seasons in the Sun," Terry Jacks
4. "I've Never Been to Me," Charlene
3. "You Light Up My Life," Debby Boone
2. "Muskrat Love," The Captain and Tennille
1. "(You're) Having My Baby," Paul Anka
It's all well and good to go through the the annals of music and pick out a couple of schmaltzy songs to tear apart, bu when you do something like this, the results are going to be predictable. Inevitably, Paul Anka ends up at the top and Terry Jacks follows not close behind.
What if you did a poll like this, but stuck strictly to rock* songs? Say, no novelty songs, no teenybopper love songs, no crooning lounge singers.
Just keep in mind that "worst" doesn't necessarily mean I haven't sung along to it on the radio.
You got the peaches, I got the cream
Sweet to taste, saccharine
'Cos I'm hot, say what, sticky sweet
From my head, my head, to my feet
Do you take sugar? one lump or two?
Does it get much worse than that, based on lyrics alone? No, it doesn't.
I'll put up some mp3s later tonight of some really bad rock songs. Because one person's bad is another person's You Give Love A Bad Name.
*as always, for the sake of arugment and an interesting poll, rock music here includes, but is not limited to, any genre of rock and sub genres therein, including punk, metal, classic, alternative, hair metal, etc. However, we are going to leave black and death metal out of it, because that's just too easy.
Tomorrow is the 10th Day of Silence.
Founded in 1996, the Day of Silence® has become the largest single student-led action towards creating safer schools for all, regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression. From the first-ever Day of Silence® at the University of Virginia in 1996, to the organizing efforts in over 1,900 middle schools, high schools, colleges and universities across the country in 2002, its textured history reflects its diversity in both numbers and reach.
The daughter will be participating again and is going to write up a little something about it that I'll post here.
I was going to put some commentary about that here like I did last year but honestly, any group that uses the phrase "homesexual agenda" in its literature isn't worth the effort it would take to counter their ideals, as their minds are a bit too closed for it to make a difference.
Look for this place to kick back in full gear this week. However, it's going to be mostly music and gaming, so if that's your gig, great..if not, I have to say I really don't feel much like writing about anything else.
You can check out my suggested listening for the week in the sidebar. I have to figure out how to get this MT media module thing to work.
Looking forward to getting back to putting real content here. Hope you gamers (especially those anticipating the Ninento Revolution like I am) and music geeks hang around. And if you have any music suggestions for me, I'd love to hear them.
Also, I haven't read a blog in ages. I'm not interested in war blogs, political blogs, news blogs or anything of the sort. I'm just looking for some fun reading. Right now, the only blogs on my list are Coop's and Dr. Frank's. So if you want to kick over some interesting reads, that would be awesome.
Hmm. This place needs a new design.
I'm not even going to think about it. While Friday runs a close second, nothing will ever compare to :
I saw that in the movie theater about ten times in one weekend. We quoted it endlessly - still do - and no matter how many years later and how many times I watch it, it's never lost a step.
Pedro: Man, what is in this shit, man?
Man Stoner: Mostly Maui Waui man, but it's got some Labrador in it.
Pedro: What's Labrador?
Man Stoner: It's dog shit.
Man Stoner: Yeah, my dog ate my stash, man.
Man Stoner: I had it on the table and the little motherfucker ate it, man. Then I had to follow him around with a little baggie for three days, man, before I got it back. Really blew the dog's mind, ya know?
Pedro: You mean we're smokin' dog shit, man?
Man Stoner: Gets ya high, don't it?
[Song, "Rockin' Robin" plays... ]
Man Stoner: I think it's even better than before, you know?
Pedro: Uhhh, I wonder what Great Dane tastes like, man.
One of the greatest movie moments ever.
So what's your favorite stoner movie?
Not for me, but who am I to deny a little musical accompaniment to those who enjoy this date?
I am totally digging the new Pearl Jam song.
I'm trying to decide which is the more worthless invention; the Octodog or the bread crust cutter. So far, I'm leaning toward the cutter.
If you bought one of these crust cutters or have ever even thought it would be a good idea to use one, you have failed at living skills and need to turn in your merit badge for basic survival. In return, you will get your merit badge in "being really fucking lazy." It's called a knife, you can probably find it in your kitchen drawer.
Most useless invention ever? Or you got something worse?
Thank you to Penny Arcade for this delicious piece of work in which the current mood is so eloquently described.
So i've gotten into 24 since I've been away.
Any of you into it? What's your theories? Are you as fascinated with Chloe as I am?
Enough about me. What are you guys watching these days? Listening to?
(yea, i'm still trying to figure out what i'm doing here, bear with me)
Update, re 24: can i get a HOLY SHIT!?
While I figure out what I'm doing here, I thought I'd fill you in on what's been going on with me since October. Then I realized that, except for the whole being single again thing, not a hell of a lot. Except I took a whole lot of pictures. DJ is still playing the guitar 24/7 and Nat is still a teenager, though getting better at not being a whiny teenager. The more things change....
For the curious and concerned, I'm doing very ok. There's a lot of happiness in my life at the moment. A lot.
So. Go back to pop culture? Just write? Fill in the blanks for you? Random notes from Long Island? I'm leaning towards a music/mp3 blog at the moment, interspersed with my general entertainment related ramblings like the old days. I've been discovering a lot of new (old) bands, digging into different genres and all, and I'll probably share some of that here. And I've come to realize that Queens of the Stone Age have surpassed Faith No More as my favorite band. Yes,it was a shocking revelation to myself as well.
Here, have a song whilst I contemplate this place. I think it's going to take me a bit to fully get back into this.
NoMeansNo - Cats, Sex and Nazis
I spy with my lizard eye and everything I see is a lie
You know when I told you I would never lie
Well, that was the first time
Take all the pleasures that you seek
May my heart be full and still be bleak
Cold and alone, hard as stone
Like a fuck when there is no one home
Beauty and fame are meaningless beside
The ability to kill with a look of your eye
But I defy you to see through me
Nothing is all that you will see
Cats, Sex and Nazis
That's why they call me Mr. happy
Are you a believer ? - well I'm a deceiver
But I lied when I said that honesty was dead
I really belive all the things I say to you
It's just that none of them are true
Zombies eat human flesh
Which part do you like the best ?
I like the heart the best
Zombies eat human flesh
If I haven't done all that I could do to hurt you
It's because my love is true
Or because my feelings are a lie
And we live just to suffer and die
I'll put a guarantee on all the beauty that I see
The fairest, the best, the first of the blest
All those whose souls are the ugliest
Hopelessly lost in their bitterness
Love me and you shall be free to join my eternal captivity
Just don't ask me if I believ all this bull
My head is empty but my bowels are full
I don't really think this way
I did yesterday, but not today
Cats, Sex and Nazis...
Zombies eat human flesh...
I spy with my lizard eye and everything I say is a lie
And what about you ? What will you do ?
When the sound of my voice touches you
When you hear me say, "This is true."
And the sounds of my voice touches you
This is true, this is true
The sounds of my voice touches you
This is true, this is true
Cats, Sex and Nazis
That's why they call me Mr. Happy
Why do I keep saying this over and over all the time ?
Because it rhymes, moron
What do I want to hear now, a love song ?
Are you in love ?
Is it politically correct ?
Or are you just another fucking reject ?
Sre you getting all of this ?
Or is there something you have missed ?
Zombies eat human flesh...
Do you know why they call me Mr. Happy ?
Because I'm so fucking
Don't know exactly what I'm going to do with this or how often I'm going to do it, but I guess I'm open for business again.
I was testing the waters the last two days and I realized I miss writing and I miss all of you.
Well, most of you.
It's going ok.
My sister had a baby.
Kids are doing good.
Working on my writing.
Happy that baseball season is here.
Thinking about dusting off the cobwebs here.
How's it going?