« Free People Read Freely | Main | J-E-T-S, W? T? F? »

ASV Rock and Roll Hall of Fame: Categories

I need some new categories. So far we've had the free for all with Rush, the "A" list (Alice Cooper and AC/DC) and now hair metal.

I need HUNDREDS of categories! Be whimsicial, creative, outrageous, serious, idiotic, suggestive, ridiculous, smart, funny, eh......you know what I mean. Come up with a bunch of good categories and I don't even care if you creat a category that is specifically tailored to getting your favorite band into the HoF.

Update: I think you guys are missing one point; these stupid categories are just a way to get a band into the hall. Everyone gets in under the same umbrella: Rock And Fucking Roll. I'm only using the categories as a way to get bands in one or two at a time.

I'm not making sense. Carry on. We'll muddle through this somehow.

Comments

Best neo metal band covered by Richard Cheese.

Heh, that's easy! Disturbed!

Hello, I stumbled upon this blog for an assignment I have to do for my communications technology and global society class. We are supposed to comment on one of the "100 most popular blogs as determined by technorati." Well I searched through technorati and this site is the only one that was of any interest to me. After we comment we have to then explain our comment, etc. Well, Im done with my little exclaimer so I'll get to the real point of my comment

First off, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Idea is brilliant. I am a huge music fan myself. Here are some of my ideas for possible catagories:
-Best Reunion Tour Band
-Best "one hit wonder" ( Very cliche)
-Best Songwriter
-Worst Songwriter
-Best band to come out of The City of Chicago
-Best New Wave Band
-Best "Music Video" Band
-Best "Emo" band, which is a widely used term these days
-Best 90's band that was NOT Nirvana

Hope I could be of any help and I look forward to voting next time.

Have a great day.

Best four-piece band from Texas that had an ex-ewok as a bass player, whose biggest hit was named after a park!

"Best pants"

"Most likely to offend parents"

"Most ridiculous band mascot"

"Most guitars on stage at one time"

"Best One-Hit-Wonder"

"Most Dated" (does not survive the test of time)

"Scariest"

"Ugliest Drummer"

"Most likely to be mocked by Lemmy"

"Most surprised that they survived"

"Most likely to be working in factories now"

"Most underrated guitarist"

"Most underrated vocalist"

"Most average bass player"

"Most likely to end up in a pile of groupies"

Individually talented group that created the most mediocre songs.

Most kick-ass keyboards!

Best band in costume and/or makeup. (And the follow-up: best band to take off the make-up.)

Most disturbing lyrical image (may have to exclude GWAR from this one).

Best band the "true music fans" were supposed to hate. (Could split this one up by decade.)

Best mosh pits (define it as you will: biggest, best-behaved, able to keep kids moshing for 20 years or more, whatever...).

Best Live Band (Arena, Club catagories)
Best Band On Vinyl
Best Band Name
Band You'd Most Like To Go Drinking With
Best Band Never To Have A Radio Hit
Best Band Of Ugly People
Best Band With A Chick Out Front

Best Grunge
Best Prog/Art Rock
Best Blues Rock
Best Psychodelic Rock
Best Soft Rock (oxymoron)
Jump the Shark Band (i.e., Kiss's disco attempt)
Fish Out of Water Performer (i.e., Celine Dion singing You Shook Me ALL Night, etc.)
Best Riffmiesters
Best Punk
Most Original
Least Original

Best Shock Rockers

Best Band Who Featured a Dwarf On Stage

Betty Ford Memorial Trophy for Distinguished Achievement in Substance Abuse

Most Creatively Debauched

Best Group That Was Pretentious As Hell But You Didn't Care

Most Stoned

Most Likely to Regret Having Listened to in the First Place

Best two-guitar harmony.

Best combination of acoustic and distorted guitars in a single song.

Best novelty guitar (or bass or drumset).

Best grimace (or best sneer).

Best Christ pose by a lead singer.

Best band to annoy your parents

Best band to annoy your kids

Best band to annoy everyone around you

Best band that nobody you know has ever heard of

Best obscure band to name-drop in casual conversation to prove how fucking hip you are

Best band to pretend to like in order to attract chicks

Best band to pretend to like in order to attract guys

Best band to be obsessively fanboyish about

Best story of "misadventure" not resulting in death

Best story of "misadventure" resulting in the death of a band member

Best suicide

"Best Band Named Van Halen"

I nominate the DLR version, and I'd better not read any crap about the Cherone version being better.....

and I'd better not read any crap about the Cherone version being better.....

That would be a bannable offense here.

In my eyes, the Cherone incarnation never even existed and Van Hagar is just a figment of your imagination.

And anyone who knows me well knows that both Van Halen and Faith No More will get inducted into this HoF simply on the merits of my own favoritism toward them.

Best ugly band
Best 'behind the music' story
Best SuperBand (made up of established, good/popular musicians)
Best Incarnation of Black Sabbath

Best band from New York, London, Los Angeles ... etc

Best Band from Canada, UK, Australia (Foreign Category)

Best vocal harmonies

Best singer (In the David Lee Roth mold) excluding DLR

Clearly, Michelle is right - this effort should be driven by deciding what the Tubes called "The Completion Backwards" principle - decide what band you want in, and then create a category for that band:

Dream Academy - Best Inclusion of Orchestral Instruments in a Rock Band

The Police - Best Repeated Use of Long Vowel Sounds (E,O,U) in a Song.

The Tubes - Best Stage Show featuring Simulated Rape/Murder

Tin Machine - Most Extraneous 'Band' Members

Wings - Best Post-Starmaking Band Band That Didn't Suck as Much as Everybody Thought It Did

Metallica - Best Angry Band that Doesn't Really Have Any Reason to be Angry Any More

"Best Band to Also Have a Drug Saga" (I'm looking at you, Weiland)

Did I miss the obvious? For fear of sounding cliched - "Most Cowbell"

Best Angst
Best Groupies
Best "Goes to 11" Sound
Best Nicknames
Least Talented Musicians that Sound Good
Most Trite Lyrics
Best Lyrics Consisting of Repetitions of a Single Obscenity
Best "Attitude" in Interviews

Best band to listen to while drinking. (Perhaps sub-categories for beer, wine, Jack, etc.)
Best band to listen to while stoned.
Best band to listen to on acid. (Perhaps a sub-category for mushrooms, peyote, etc.)
Best band to listen to while coked up.
Best band to listen to on Ecstasy. (XTC actually happens to get my vote for this one. Or it would if I had a reason to vote in this category.)
Best band to nod off to.
and finally,

Best band to listen to in Rehab.

Best hair band to make it big accidentally.

Yes, there is a story there.

Best sneering former punker who hit the mainstream with a big-haired guitar-synth player, who later jumped the shark with a romantic comedy.

Best dead rocker cum contemporary concert music composer with a mustache and whose last name rhymes with "Snappa".

Best Synth
Best Punk
Best New Wave
Letting my absurd side just run:
Best band with a cute sneering rock chick.
Best band with a cute sneearing rock dude.
Best use of pink vinyl.
Best Lou Reed and/or Iggy Pop imitation.
Best Patti Smith imitation.
Best Debbie Harry imitation.
Best obscure science fiction reference in a song.
Best overtly obvious science fiction reference in a song. (Horselips: Phasers on Stun.)
Best exploitation of a tragedy. (I nominate "Tell Me Why I Don't Like Mondays")
Most obnoxious use of a classical music piece.
Best use of a classical music piece.
Weirdest collaboration. (ELO and ONJ on Xanadu comes to mind.)
Best attempt by a TV Star to cross over into music. (It ain't Don Johnson.)
Best song about or including a car.

Bands, people. We are nominating BANDS.

Or....

are we?

Should the HoF include songs and albums and events as well?

This could provide me with blogging fodder forEVER!

Yes! Songs, albums and events too! It will be an ultimate RnRHoF!

The thing I've been meaning to make a list of for forever is this:

Best Vocalist Moment Ever.
-this can be a note someone held that was awesome, the way a line was sung, the way a word was pronounced, the way so-and-so's voice sounded just like a guitar. Basically any one vocal part of a song that is just to mind-blowingly rad.

For example:
When Travis from Piebald says "Did I st-st-st-stutter?" in the song "Just a Simple Plan

Chris Batstone's note at "It's nooooooooot the person you have left behind" on Suburban Legends' "I Wanted More".

Scott Klopfenstein's falsetto on "hear me out just for tonight" from "Average Man" by Reel Big Fish.

Best band that made regular use of an instrument not usually associated with rock. This would exclude, for instance, AC/DC's one-off use of bagpipes in "Long Way to the Top" or VH's use of a penny whistle in "Runnin' With the Devil." But it would allow entries such as Jethro Tull with the flute, Kansas with the violin, or Rush with the glockenspiel.

Most embarrassing cameo in a TV program or movie.

Also, please keep in mind this is the hall of FAME, not SHAME. No negative categories (like worst anything)

Best Giving the Finger to the World Song

Best album "before they were popular"
Best mainstream album purists like, but are embarrassed to own
Best rap album for mainstream America
Best band, post sell out
Best band, post MTV, that never had an MTV presence
Best song about insanity
Best band with no discernable drug, mother, sex, or breakup issues

Umm, best at fencing? Ok, not really

Best band that Genre jumped mid-career.

How about categories about their preferred drug?

Best acid band-I nominate Jethro Tull

Best heroin band, I nominate early Billy Joel and all Steely Dan

Best pot band- I think I nominate the Chili Peppers

Best cocaine band, I nominate later Billy Joel

Best garage band; and
Best garage band that should have stayed in the garage.

You can't have one without the other.

Band/group that has done best job of pimping music into commercials, movies, and added income opportunities (think Moby, Beatles, Who, etc.)

Best Band to Open For The Ramones.