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it's this rug I have


Air freshener, interior, the White Zombie - camera phone

One way to get yourself out of a bad mood is to listen to Mitch Hedberg on your drive in to work. I had to turn it off eventually because it's hard to drive when you're laughing so hard you might pee your pants.

So I'm driving and this 90+ year old lady pulls up next to me. She smiles at me, nods knowingly as if we're both in on some great secret.

And then I remembered the decal I put on the car Sunday:


The woman in the car next to me was not a human at all, but a zombie. Oh, don't look so surprised. I told you all that zombies drive around Long Island.

Anyhow. The other day I asked for help in finding an mp3 and because no one came through for me, I stopped being passive about my search and started being aggressive. I knew where to go - to the proprietor of one of my favorite blogs, Blank Forever. Within minutes of my email, Tesco replied with the song I was looking for. Bless you. Now you all should go read his blog because it's a daily treat.

Oh, the song. I shall share.

Choking Victim - 500 Channels.

And when you hate your life, no qualtities redeeming,
a million brainwashed zombies will always be heard screaming...
And when there is no hope,
I'll smoke some crack, I'll shoot some dope!
When theres no enemies,
I sit and stare at my T.V.
and in my ignorance,
I'll be a slave and sycophant!

See, it has zombies in it. This is how I tie it all together: Tesco mentioned the Misfits in the comments here, I post a picture of my Misfits air freshener, seque into zombies, show you my zombie sticker, share a song that Tesco sent me - a song that uses the word "zombies" in the lyrics.

Tied together. Like a fucking rug.


Nice air freshener... Thanks for the props!

I never got my "something" for picking the winning name. Dissed by Michele.

I never said what the "something" was, so how can you be sure you never got it?

Maybe it was my undying affection, or a wish for world peace or, perhaps I raised my glass to you one night when I was out binge drinking with Rob Zombie.