life is random
I wasn't going to blog at all today, but I've got something on my mind. Something that won't leave, no matter what else I try to think about. Maybe writing it out and engaging in some kind of discussion about it will help. Or not.
This weekend, something tragic happened just a few short miles from my house. Tragic things happen every day, in every city, in every country. Stories just like this one. But there's something about the story being local news that makes it feel personal. More intense.
What happened was this: a family had just left a wedding celebration. They were riding home in a limo (they were all either in the wedding party or immediate relations of the bride and groom). They were met head on by a drunk driver, who was going the wrong way on the Meadowbrook Parkway. The limo driver was killed. The seven year old flower girl was killed.
What they don't tell you in the paper or on tv is that the mother of the seven year old sat on the side of the road holding her seven year old daughter's head. Cradling her head. For almost an hour, while police and firemen cut the rest of her family out of the vehicle.
My boss (the judge) arraigned the drunk driver yesterday, in the hospital. The guy has minor injuries. I can't get into the details of what a stupid, selfish, fucking moron this person is, but suffice it to say, I hope he dies a brutal prolonged death soon.
So here's this guy who killed two people including a seven year old girl, severely injured three others and destroyed a family and he's n the hospital with a broken ankle. Meanwhile, this mother is going to spend the rest of her life reliving the moments when she held her daughter's head in her lap. Can you imagine? No, you can't possibly imagine. Not one of us can come close to imagining hte depth of sorrow this woman and her family is feeling today.
So how do people of faith continue to proclaim the virtues of god? How do you exist every day saying god is just and god is good? How can you believe in god when things like this happen? Why do people constantly say things like "God saved my little one from dying in that accident" or "God told me to feed the homeless" or "God led me to not get on that plane today, he saved me from being in that crash" when it can't possibly be? Because if God is going to save one little girl from dying, why can't he save the rest? And I know people have to die, that's the way of the world, but what kind of god would let a mother sit on the side of the road at 2am after her sister's wedding, cradling the remains of her little girl in her arms while the child's killer lives to tell the tale? Don't even tell me that god gives you what you can handle. Because that makes it sound like a gift and losing a child is certainly not a gift, nor should it be seen as a test of faith or a testament to god's mysterious ways. It's just proof on top of more proof for me that the world is so god damn random and there is no great being looking out for us, hearing our prayers, seeing to miracles, or helping us help ourselves. There is just randomness. No fate, no destiny, no pre-written paths or intervention from above. Just randomness.
[file under "things to be deleted after I get it out of my systerm"]