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Listomatic: TIME's movie list, two dicks and a drunken master

[Note: If you are looking for my review of RotS, which apparently people are, it's here]

So TIME Magazine, not to be outdone by every other list making magazine, came out with its own list of ALL-TIME 100 MOVIES as chosen by critics Richard Corliss and Richard Schickel. I'm thinking the list was originally just called Time's Greatest Movies, but they added on the author credit blurb after they saw the final list, so no one would think that this list somehow belonged to TIME as a whole. They were distancing themselves from the two Dicks.

First of all, any time you have the word "critics" in a list title, you know it's going to be pretentious. "Reader's list" or "listener's list," while they may include such titles as Debbie Does Dallas or Freebird, respectively, at least will have a certain feel to them, like the compilation of titles could be kindred spirits with your very own list. But when you add movie critics to the mix - not critics in the sense that you and I (or even the people at Rotten Tomatoes) are, but critics in the sense of sense of this is my nose and I'm looking down it at you - you end up with a list that rivals ROLLING STONE's Albums of the Year list for sheer pretensiousness, snobbery and, in some cases, utter head scratching. It's as if some of these titles were thrown onto the list in an effort to keep people like me from calling the critics unrepentant twits. Let's have a look, shall we?

Complete list

First of all, I never heard of some of these movies. That doesn't, in and of itself, make the list good or bad. It just means that a) I don't get out enough or b) the critics thought the inclusion of obscure foreign films would make the list highbrow.

The usual suspects are present and accounted for: Godfather, Casablanca, Singing in the Rain, Some Like it Hot, E.T., Goodfellas...you know the drill.

No Seven Samurai. Star Wars, but not Empire Strikes Back. No Shawshank Redemption or even Fantasia.

Oh, I know. You make a list of 100 movies and see how hard it is to include all the great ones. That's what you're thinking. But let's see what IS included.

Drunken Master. The Fly (1986). Finding Nemo. FINDING NEMO? Yea, it was a good movie, but one of the best ever made? If they wanted to throw in some animation to appease the lovers of that genre, Toy Story, Spirited Away, The Incredibles...all better than Finding Nemo. And they count The Lord of the Rings (2001-03) as ONE movie! That's cheating.

I'm not saying these movies are bad. But how can you take seriously any list that has DRUNKEN MASTER as one of the 100 best films ever made? And am I the only person alive who hated Raging Bull? (OH, and remind me to tell you of the nightmare I had about a remake of Taxi Driver, starring Adam Sandler)

Ok, you know what this means. What happened when Rolling Stone came out with their list of 500 greatest songs ever and I took issue with the whole damn thing? That's right, I made my own.

Get ready for the ASV 100 Greatest Movies of All Time, coming soon to a blog post near you.

Meanwhile, I fully expect you to start picking apart TIME's list. Bonus: How many of the 100 movies on this list have you actually seen?

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Comments

I also had no use for Raging Bull. Drunken Master and Finding Nemo had to be the "shock value" picks, solely put out to get folks talking.

Look, they've got "Joe vs The Volcano" as one of their guilty pleasures. Even Tom Hanks trashes that movie these days.

All I'm sayin' is you don't have to put yourself through this again.

...and I'm putting in the first bid for "The Adventures of Buckaroo Bonzai across the 8th Dimension"

Barry Lyndon?????
Barry Freakin' LYNDON????
We're done here.

Oh come on! It's Drunken Master II. Completely different. ;p

I think the list pretty much sucks the wazoo.

I've never heard of "The Singing Detective" but I dislike the image it conjures to the point of me wanting to physically beat the screenwriter.

On the other hand, I'm a huge fan of "Raging Bull."

I just noticed the ommision of "The Magnificent Seven."

It was probably bumped for "The Singing Detective."

I honestly believe these lists are created to enrage people.

If they would have named the list "we really like these movies" I would have no quiblle,but c'mon!

I just read the review of the "Singing Detective" and I find it's almost seven hours long. I wash my hands of it.

Well, I can't be the only person who loves Berlin Alexanderplatz. I always make sure to catch the Alexanderplatz marathon on TNT. John Candy is especially good in it.

I've seen only 17 of those movies. What's worse, I ony recognize about 40 of the movies.

I wonder if "The Singing Detective" is responsible for someone thinking that "Cop Rock" was a good idea...

I've seen 39 of these movies, and recognize about fifteen more. I like movies, a lot, and some of these are completely unfamiliar - and not just the ones from the '20s. "Ulysses' Gaze" and "Talk to her" are from the last ten years, and I've somehow missed even hearing of them. A while back, someone had a list of their top 100 ignored classics, and I had seen 60 of those.

The movie title that put me off my feed was "The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie." I can't imagine a title more certain to make me avoid the movie.

On the plus side, several movies that I feel are often overlooked are here, like "Miller's Crossing" and "Brazil." A very odd list, and not very useful. Even in these internet days, I imagine you'd have some difficulty locating some of these flicks.

Drunken Master II??? Number one I could understand, but II?

SciFi/Fantasy flicks they included: Brazil, The Bride of Frankenstien ['35], Bladerunner, Dr Strangelove, The Fly ['86], Invasion of the Body Snatchers, King Kong, LoTR, Metropolis ['27], and Star Wars.

Is it just me, or is there an overriding anti-technology message?

I have to tell my boyfriend there exists a sequel to Drunken Master, he will be overjoyed.

But personally I found this list unimpressive. And I thought Pinnochio was dumb.

I believe that these lists are best ignored.

Now "The Ten Best Deaths Of Samuel L. Jackson" is a darn fine list.

This is the most culturally diverse, politically correct list of movies I've ever seen. Am reminded of the famous line uttered by former Secretary of the Interior, James Watt (under Reagan), "We have every kind of mixture you can have. I have a black, I have a woman, two Jews, and a cripple, James Watt said of his staff at the Department of the Interior.

I've seen forty-one. I have The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeosie on video, fercrissake.

Still, I'm not about to claim that this list is anything other than Conventional Wisdom amplified; there's no particular thought to it.

The Singing Detective is an absolutely brilliant, dark work which originally aired as a series on British television. Written by Dennis Potter and starring Michael Gambon it's a searing meditation on loss, love, heartbreak, sexual perversion and disfiguring illness. Similar to Cop Rock? Um, no.

Who the He** has heard of all these flicks? Not to mention, why is it in title order, as opposed to being ranked from 1-100? For a real list of the best 100 movies of all time, check out the American Film Institute at afi.com.

I've definitely seen 24 of them. I may have actually watched all of Citizen Kane, but I can't remember for sure.

Of the ones I have seen, what the hell are "E.T." and "The Purple Rose of Cairo" doing on the list? "E.T." was cute, but one of the greatest movies ever made? Not IMO. "The Purple Rose of Cairo" wasn't even all that cute.

I've seen 68. Know what I like best about this list? There's no Katharine Hepburn. Or Gone with the Wind.

Counting Lord of the Rings as one movie isn't cheating IMO; it was shot as a single production, after all. Counting the Godfathers and Apu Trilogy as single entries is cheating. As is including TV miniseries (The Singing Detective and Decalogue).

Drunken Master II - hell yes. Though I'm sorry to see Jet Li's Once Upon a Time in China series get snubbed.

I miss Seven Samurai, but am glad to see Ikiru get some love. I'm also happy Miller's Crossing made the list, though at the expense of Raising Arizona.

Finding Nemo is easily the worst choice on here. Lord of the Rings is a close second (Jackson's Heavenly Creatures is so much better). Correct choice on classic Disney, though. Pinocchio's great. Fantasia and Snow White are chores to sit through.

So there's some obscure stuff on here. So what? I'd rather be pointed in a new direction now and then then have more jackasses tell me how great shit like Jerry Maguire or Forrest Gump were.

They should have shown Seven Samurai some love, but Yojimbo is on there, as well as Ikiru, so Kurosawa got some respect. I would pick Yojimbo over Seven Samurai myself, come to think of it. Mifune channeling Brando, lotsa violence and completely despicable characters, it's fun for the whole family!

I'm surprised The Hidden Fortress didn't make it; that's usually the Kurosawa film that critics throw out to show how hep they are.

Overall, it is a boring list. I could have told you what movies were on there sight unseen. Film critics are such pretentious sheep.

And finally: Big Lebowski, Buckaroo Banzai, and Big Trouble In Little China should be at the top of any discerning cinephile's list.

'It's A Gift" is W.C. Field's best movie, and was a good inclusion. You'll never see a more misanthropic film. Check it out!