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rock and roll haiku!

So DJ had this assignment last week where he had to write five haikus. It wasn't an easy task as a)DJ is not exactly poetic in his thinking and b) two haikus had to be about Rome and two about Greece.

Fortunately for the boy, the last haiku could be about anything. When asked for help choosing a subject, I gave my son the old adage "write what you know." And so fifteen minutes later he came into the living room with his fresh haiku, entitled The Stages of Van Halen.

David Lee Roth rocks
Gary Cherone doesn't count
Sammy Hagar whines

Tha was beautiful, man. He really gets the nuances of the whole Van Halen saga.

And so I open the floor once again for a haiku contest (no prizes, I don't have anything worth giving out and I still haven't sent Hubris his Twinkies) except for the adoration of people who dig things like haiku and rock and roll.

Your mission: write a haiku about your favorite rock band. Come on, I need some entertainment on a Monday!


I know this dude who
Screeches like a cat in heat.
That's f***ked up there!

Khanate isn't exactly my favorite group, but their music is pretty extreme.

Kurt's bald spot is huge
Lars, quit your bloodclot crying.
James, Cliff will haunt you.


They have a few more
And better songs than Mister
Jones and Colorblind

Counting Crows.

(I feel like I'm on Dot's Poetry Corner or something...:)

Eye of the Tiger
Man, did those guys get mileage
Out of Sly Stallone!

Dirt was very cool
But smack has its limits, dude
Too much trainspotting

Awesome, Hubris. My sentiments exactly though I never put them quite so poetically.

Fine, call me a geek
Huey Lewis does too rock
You all can get bent.

Appetite still rocks
Great songs, great guitar, too bad
Axl went crazy

Their albums come in
Alphabetical order
What comes after Z?

Randy Jackson, Dawg!
What the fuck were you thinking?
Goddamn Journey? Dude!

John Lennon died first.
Next up was George Harrison.
Ringo? Paul? Who's next?

gardening at night
when the front room green becomes
what did he just say?

Tripping Afronauts
A rock band Can play funk, man
Fly on, Maggot Brain

Mick's ego can't be
contained. Neither can Keef's pure
love of playing blues

You can't renew your,
License To Ill, old rappers
Check Your Heads, indeed

(not as good as the Metallica one, but look at my material!)

Somewhere in heaven,
Strummer and the dead Ramones
Goof on John Denver.

Whatever happened
to the man who sang the song
Achy, Breaky Heart?

Vince, haiku smackdown!
But why hate the Beastie Boys,
No love for the Blaze?

Classic Rock Glory Left Behind
Face Lift, Fire Fat Guy, Profit
Humor Lacking Dweeb

A tribute to Kevin Cronin of REO Speedwagon. ;-)

Drummer boy must be hung
Pamela Lee AND Locklear?
He can die happy

Here's 10. I've listened to this album enough to do ten more, but ten should suffice.

My name is Jonas,
Pricked my ear and my heart,
Blue is the color.

They made me want her,
With eyeballs looking around,
And laughing for me.

Where was I before,
They appeared in memory,
Turning now each day.

Happy Days were mine,
The video was better,
Than MTV best.

Saying so much more,
Than the word 'sweater' could say,
Is being undone.

This one track drew ire,
It rang of hippies and bongs,
Though they said surf wax.

It echoed my life,
And brought me low enough to,
Break free in some way.

The only song known,
To include twelve sided die,
And make it sound good.

It sounded like fun,
Getting away from it all,
But then we return.

My marrow and my,
Ride home from places in dream,
Where I can go back.

To clarify, I'm not calling all surfers hippies. There just happen to be quite a few who are.

twenty-four hours ago
I wanna be sedated
Three chords settle my nerves

"I don't want to be
president, superman, or
Clark Kent" Fastball rocks

From the song Fire Escape on their debut album.

Lead singer was wierd
But man were they creative
Justlove "Fat bottom girls"

OK, let's try and post again. Hopefully this won't show up twice. Once may be too much.

Showing my early- to mid-80s faves:

Walls of guitars, it's
a new day rising indeed.
Punk meets The Beach Boys

Illiterate drunks release anti-pop gem. Not
the Beatles last song

Mersh this mess around,
double nickels was a boon.
Fucking van axel

Husker Du!

And THEN, Replacements and Minutemen. Nice job. Gots good taste.

Oops, sorry for the formatting error. Had trouble posting from work. And with that, I'm out of here...

A preacherís boy, his
giver and taker of life.
Ainít that peculiar?

Geoff Tate's voice rules all
but 'Silent Lucidity'
was deplorable.

Whole lotta Page and
Plant leaves me dazed and confused
All hail mighty Zep

listen to his voice
masturbation fantasy
not a stich to wear

Three aging hermits,
Synths, bunny suits, home movies.
It's raining babies!

Because i don't have just one (what self-respecting rock fan has just one?)

The singer's tweeking,
On keys a Modern Lover,
The drummer's a dork!

The mad mad daddy
Does the goo goo muck; his girl
Drives a UFO.

They used ta be good
Then they sucked; Should have quit at
Dark Side of the Moon

Sometimes he gets on
A trampoline of guitars
And solos for days