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listomatic: star wars, nothing but star wars
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In preparation for Revenge of the Sith, I watched the first three (meaning first three released) Star Wars movie over the past week. It's almost unnerving how I've come back full circle to immersing myself in my Star Wars geekiness - something that left me years ago. I thought it had gone from my system, really. But I can see now that it never really leaves you. It may lie dormant, but it never leaves.

I'm not one of those full fledged Star Wars geeks that will dress in costume to go to a premiere or memorize the genealogy chart of every major - and minor- character to appear in the movies, books and comics. I am, however, enough of a geek to have long, drawn out conversations about the Star Wars world which, to outsiders listening in, would sound as if we were talking about, you know, reality. Think Randal and Dante.

One such conversation I had yesterday is one I've had a thousand times at least since I first saw Episode IV. It's something that has bothered me all these years and will continue to bother me each time I watch the movie.

Tell me something: how would you react if you watched your home planet blown to smithereeens right in front of you? Would you collapse in grief? Break down in uncontrollable sobs? Faint? Go deaf, dumb and blind from the horror of watching everyone you have ever known or loved be wiped out in milliseconds? Or would you gasp, let out a stifled cry and then, a short time later, engage in flirtatious banter with a rogue space captain?

I don't know why that has remained a sticking point with me, but it has. Oh, there are other things. I could go on and on about continuity and such, but I've learned it's better to keep those things to myself, lest I be told, once again, that I need to get a life.

Which brings me to today's lists.

Favorite Star Wars quotes (original trilogy edition, some of which are favorites because of the context)

  • Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid
  • That's no moon. It's a space station
  • Sorry about the mess
  • Apology accepted, Captain Needa
  • Laugh it up, fuzzball
  • It's against my programming to impersonate a deity
  • It's a trap!
  • You know, sometimes I amaze even myself.
  • Oota goota, Solo? Soam peetalay. EE mal-a-tran tee-tachma geekeetna
  • But I was going to go into Toshi Station to pick up some power converters!

Favorite Star Wars references from TV

  • The Animaniacs episode devoted to SW
  • "The Empire Strikes Brak"
  • The exchange in Clerks between Randal and Dante about the Death Star
  • Family Guy - Stewie freezes someone in carbonite
  • Futurama - Near Death Star
  • Chewbacca at the MTV Awards in 1997
  • Muppet Babies - they had tons of SW references, but there was one whole episode where the babies made a home movie version of Star Wars.
  • Bill Murray on SNL: Star Wars, nothing but Star Wars...
  • Simpsons - way too many to mention
  • The Chewbacca Defense
  • ZORAK: Prowse is the true Vader!
    MOLTAR: PROWSE? PROWSE?!?!??!? All he did was walk around and hold up his fist! James Earl Jones gave Lord Vader everything!

Favorite pictures from the day I did the limbo with Darth Vader


Favorite lyrics involving Star Wars

  • I'm kinda like Han Solo always strokin' my own Wookiee (Bloodhound Gang)
  • Chewbacca! What a Wookiee! (Suernova)
  • We've got Greedo and Solo to the rear. (Clutch)
  • My backpack's got jets. I'm Boba the Fett.
    I bounty hunt for Jabba Hutt to finance my 'Vette. (MC Chris download! Lyrics here)

Star Wars character I've had sexual fantasies about:

  • It ain't Luke, I'll tell you that much

It's really not going to help lower my geekiness any when I do a video game list later.


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Michele, who's obviously getting as sucked in to the Revenge of the Sith hype as I am, has a wee problem with Princess Leia's reaction in the original: Tell me something: how would you react if you watched your home... [Read More]



you GOTTA check out the song "New Hope" by Blink-182, on the "Dude Ranch" LP. I fully realize that it may not be your style of music, but it is a kick-ass song about Princess Leia...really clever.


Michele and Leia, sittin' in a tree...

Surf, I actually like Blink 182 and I meant to include that song - I'll add it on.

Disconnect - nope.

bitch, I seen you drooling over my hairy wookie ass

oh, and you forgot when half the cast appeared on the muppets. Miss Piggy was outstanding.

"Great shot, kid! Don't get cocky!"

Just sayin'

I'm thinking you have fantasies about "Cliff Claven" himself: John Ratzenberger. Something involving "leaving your shield doors open".


"Who's scruffy lookin'?"

"There's no mystical energy field controls my destiny."

"You don't know the power of the DARKSIDE."

and, of course:

"I love you."
"I know."

Likewise, just saying.

"I find your lack of faith...disturbing."
choking sounds

First! Er, to link to this site.

In college we played drinking games to this :^)

Greatest unintentionally funny line.... "Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise."

And let's not forget "Yoda" by Weird Al

"I saw the little runt sitting there on a log
I asked him his name and in a raspy voice he said
'Yoda' Y-O-D-A 'Yoda'"

Luke's line of "That's impossible!" from Empire Strikes Back is often quoted around our house, but for some reason, it has been transformed to "That's improbable!"

Star Wars character I've had sexual fantasies about:
  • It ain't Luke, I'll tell you that much

Well, let's consider the possibilities:

Obi-Wan: The SW nerd's Sean Connery. Obvious choice for an Anglophile.

Vader: Obvious choice if one is drawn to power, but may present difficulties in disrobing.

Emperor: Obvious choice for a necrophiliac.

Lando: Obvious choice for a die-hard disco child.

Yoda: Judge him by his size do you? And well you should not (but we didn't see him move at all until Ep II, so I'm guessing it's not him).

Jabba the Hutt: Just try telling him that size matters not.

The winner: Smart money's on R2-D2 - with every appendage you can possibly imagine.

Let the Wookie Win.

Sigh. You people don't know me at all.

Ok, my money's on Han Solo. I know, I know, he's the obvious one, with his dashing good looks and roguishness ... love 'em and leave 'em guy (which, of course, is pretty sexy ... what? Gloria Stienham is on the phone?)

My second choice would be C3PO ... he had me at hello.

No on Solo. And C3P0 is teh ghey.

Has to be Bobba Fett? Eh? EH?

We have a winner.

I love a good bad guy.

i am teh winner!!!! _

'Newsradio' had extended Boba Fett references - the poker game with the camera in the Boba Fett action figure being the most obvious one

Newsradio had a lot of them, almost to the point of there being a Boba Fettish, if you will

I'm sure I'm in the minority here, but I enjoyed the recent ones more than the old ones. Don't argue but Natalie Portman is much nicer to look at than Carrie Fisher. If only we can get to see her in a gold bikini with a chain around her neck.

You know, Jake - that's what porn is for. Not science fiction epics.

that Toshi station quote - oh my god, i love that line. he's such a freakin' whiner!

other fave lines of mine:

"You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."
"The Force is strong in this one."
"How you get so big eating food of this kind?"

I use that Toshi station quote whenever I want to make fun of my kids for whining.

"Beings of light we are--pinches Luke--not this stuff."

Really wraps up Yoda like a Southwestern Egg Roll.

Of course there's the obvious one that we've all used for years but we don't admit it because it's become such a part of our vocabulary that we don't even remember that it came from Star Wars:

"I've got a bad feeling about this."


Don't forget Mark Jonathan Davis' (Richard Cheese) "Star Wars Cantina":


He'll probably play it when he plays in New York on June 18th!

I don't remember the exact song, but there was a Southpark video spoof making the rounds a couple of years ago. Cartman singing and lots of Star Wars references in there. Hopefully someone knows the reference.

And there were numerous MST3K uses of Star Wars dialogue that were probably more fitting than the original.

Boba Fett, huh? You know you've got some heavy competition for that boy, Michele -- 'cause nobody could love Boba like the Sarlaac does.


Feh. What Sarlacc? You mean the one Fett blew up when it tried to eat him? That's no competition.

Seriously. It's not like the stupid Sarlacc killed him.

I had you figured for a Moff Tarkin girl, personally.

wow, i've never heard that "Star Wars Cantina" song. that's pretty good!

waitaminit. Boba Fett killed the Sarlacc? is that something from a book or something?

He let off a bomb and escaped the Sarlacc. Don't know if the bomb killed it, exactly.

A later visit indicated that at least part of the Sarlacc was left alive. Considering the size of the thing, I think a single thermal detonator would have a hard time wiping it out entirely.

Mikey, yeah, that's from the Expanded Universe (collective term for all the extra books, comics, games, etc. that are licensed by Lucas but not strictly canonical). Try "Tales of the Bounty Hunters", I think.

Boba Fett was one of my favorite characters, (though not in the same way you seem to think of him, ha!)

Too bad Lucas kinda ruined him.

I read those Boba Fett books but thought they were just ok. I thought the 'young' Han Solo books that came out around the same time were were better. The older Han Solo books by Brian Daley are also good.

Holy crap I am feeling so nerdy right now...

"Impressive, most impressive."

Although my fondness for this line has been forever tarnished my Michele's use of it on the coloring book caption contest from a few days back. Now instead of a dramatic confrontation between father and son, I keep getting flashes of bio-mechanical incest.

One of my fav Star Wars TV/Movie references are again from Kevin Smith and Chasing Amy with this great exchange

Jay: "Check this shit. You got cracker farm boy Luke Skywalker, Nazi poster boy, blond hair, blue eyes. And then you got Darth Vader, the blackest brother in the galaxy, Nubian god!"

Banky: "What's a Nubian?"

"I had you figured for a Moff Tarkin girl, personally."

Chicks dig the phermones and s&m.

Dunno about you, but Leia's first comment to Tarkin about expecting to see him holding Vader's leash, seemed to imply that she knew something about their real relationship . . .

Kev, as much as I didn't like Chasing Amy, that entire scene remains one of my favorite movie scenes ever.

"as much as I didn't like Chasing Amy, that entire scene remains one of my favorite movie scenes ever."

I've never seen a movie take such a headlong leap into the abyss after the first 20 minutes.

I like all of Chasing Amy. But I also think Joey Lauren Adams is cuter than Hello Kitty.

But I also think Joey Lauren Adams is cuter than Hello Kitty.

I'd hit it.

Now I'm never getting to sleep tonight.

Luke: ...you told me Vader betrayed and murdered my father!

Obi-Wan: What I told you was true, from a certain point of view.

Luke: A certain point of view?

Obi-wan: Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view.

Me: Translation: OBI-WAN LIED HIS ASS OFF!

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