on the ricochet, it's going to hit you
[the following is a bulk answer to a slew of emails]
No, this is not me, nor do I have anything to do with it. If I had a dollar for every time I've been asked about that over the past week or so, I'd be able to buy a Big Mac meal, super size it, and get the two apple pies for a dollar deal. Twice.
It's not that I never thought of anything like that, because I have. And I bet a lot of you have, too. But I figure if I'm going to take issue with any sacred cows, I'll show my face while I'm doing it. Come to think of it, I have done just that. And the results were not surprising.
I was asked by a kind reader if this bothers me at all and I can honestly say no, it does not. I'd much rather speak my opinion out loud - even if it goes against that grain - and face the finger pointing than swallow what I want to say because it may upset some imaginary apple cart that we're supposed to be riding in.
I think some people - especially a certain few emailers - are forgetting an important fact about me. Well, several really. I am not a conservative. Yes, I am a Republican, but that does not make me conservative. And they forget that I was a one issue voter. So when I get emails saying things like "We need to stick together, not take each other apart," or "It's not in our best interest to be back biting," I almost fall off my chair laughing. What? You don't see the asburdity in people telling me to keep my opinions quiet and stick with the program? I sure do.
When I declared myself a Bush supporter, I was welcomed into the Republican's "big tent" as they like to call it. Yea, yea we know you support gay marriage and you don't really like the President's immigration policies and you're an atheist, but here's your 'Hello, I'm a Republican" name tag and have some punch!
I campaigned for Bush. Hard. I went all out for him because I believed he was the right president at the right time (and I still believe that). But a funny thing happened after Bush won the election. That big tent suddenly got very small and I found there really wasn't an awful lot of room for me in there after all. I got squeezed out, so to speak, by people who think because my views on religion and marraige and education don't coincide with theirs that I should just shut up about those issues and speak only about Iraq and democracy and the war on terror. You know, the things we agree on.
Hell hath no fury like a hard liner being disagreed with. And so I end up coming full circle, back to that place where I'm not on the left, and I'm not on the right and I'm kind of looking around for a place to sit down and eat my lunch, but the cafeteria is looking mighty segregated. And I'm fine with that, because even if I sit by myself, or with other geeks and freaks, I'm at least being honest about who I am and what I stand for. I wear the Led Zeppelin shirt, but I'm not afraid to admit my love for a little KC and the Sunshine Band. Know what I'm saying?
Why didn't I write anything about Chris Rock, you ask? Why? Because, unlike many of you, I wasn't surprised. I wasn't shocked. I just stifled a yawn, had another bite of apple pie and waited for him to stop talking. If you were shocked and appalled, then you need to really reconsider watching television at all, because the thing is rife with Bush jokes. And if you're getting so bent out of shape about what a comedian said about the president that you want to form some kind of campaign against Rock, the Oscars, ABC and the makers of Rock's tuxedo, then I think a little chill pill is in order. Was his act funny? No, not really. Not even the part about Jude Law, and I hate Jude Law. Was it something to get worked up about? No, it wasn't. Free speech, consequences, all that. We've done this before. I don't do boycotts, so don't ask, ok? I mean, I don't own Pootie Tang, so I can't throw it on your bonfire, but you'll pry my copy of Osmosis Jones out of my cold, dead hands.
Anyhow, my potty mouth and loose morals and "abandonment" of my party notwithstanding, I'm still a Republican. Maybe I'm not your idea of what a Republican should be, but then again, you're not my idea of what a decent human being should be. So there.