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Release the Robotic Richard Simmons!

bios_townspeople_burns.gif More misunderstood than evil, Mr. Burns may possess unparalleled power in Springfield, but he can barely lift a baseball bat.

Ladies and gentlecommenters, your winner of the Simspons Secondary Character Award, C. Montgomery "Monty" Burns. He edged Willie the Groundskeeper out by a mere ten votes to earn this award. When asked for a statement regarding his victory over Willie, Burns said, of course, excellent.

Perhaps Monty's best known episode is the two part Who Shot Mr. Burns?, but it's certainly not his best.

Who could forget Homer the Smithers, in which Homer replaces Burns's manservant?
I'll have my lunch now. A single pillow of Shredded Wheat, some steamed toast, and a dodo egg.

Or this exchange from A Star is Burns?

Burns: Get me Steven Spielberg!
Smithers: He's unavailable.
Burns: Then get me his non-union Mexican equivalent!
Burns: Listen, Senor Spielbergo, I want you to do for me what Spielberg did for Oskar Schindler.
Spielbergo: Er, Schindler es bueno, Senor Burns es el diablo.
Burns: Listen, Spielbergo, Schindler and I are like peas in a pod. We're both factory owners, we both made shells for the Nazis, but mine worked, dammit! Now go out there and win me that festival!

Or this episode, which any Burns fan will know just from the picture:

Here's a lenghty biography of Mr. Burns.
The lyrics to See My Vest (my favorite Burns episode)
And a Burns trivia quiz.

I'm almost sorry this is over. Any ideas for other contests featuring beloved cartoon characters? Maybe I'll conjure up something with Bugs Bunny in honor of this.

Congratulations, Mr. Burns!


I like the cut of his jib.

And thank you for not making fun of my genitalia.

This was fun. A similar Looney Tunes contest sounds like a good idea to me...

"Smithers, I owe you a Coke."

The Stargate folks have recently floated their suspicion of Burns being a Go'ald system lord.

A contest for Favorite Simpson's Song Parodies - (my entry "Glove Slap")

Best cartoon character in drag -

If you're feeling ambitious - a Field of 64 (March Madness style) knockout bracket of cartoon characters could work -

Sixteen Classic WB,
Sixteen Hanna Barbera / Disney -
Sixteen Modernish (Animaniacs, etc)
Sixteen Japanimation/Other

Seed the entries ...

bracket voting

Sweet 16, Great Eight, Final Four

Upsets, Betting

It'd be a complete waste of time.

In other words, perfect.