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creepy valentines

The one thing I do love about Valentine's Day is being able to post my favorite creepy valentines.

val31.gif

What do you suppose is going on here?

Comments

They definitely look related. And Irish, to boot.

Oh, wow, that's creepy. That's gotta be incest.

The incestuousness went right past me until it was pointed out above. I'm more worried that he looks like he's about to start gnawing her eyeballs.

Heh. Nothing says Valentine's Day like a gnawed eyeball.

What I want to know is, if she's his duckydoodle, why's he giving her the stinkeye?

I also want to know what the hell a duckydoodle is.

I would say duckydoodle is code word for pedophile.

Was that Michael Jackson last Valentine's Day card?

My first thought: pedophile! Sad, because it's probably a greeting from a time when pedophilia wasn't a mainstream topic. And being gay meant you were happy!

Where to begin? He's at least twice as tall as she is, which suggests she's a fairly young child. "She" also appears to be a boy. He has his hand on "her" hip, indicating perhaps that he's about to make a move towards the crack of "her" ass. And the placement of his arms, together with his size advantage, leads one to believe that she's staying put whether she wants to or not.

About the dominant/submissive facial expressions, let us say nothing.

What do you suppose is going on here?

Something that's illegal in most states. And Canada.

Also, the caption. The baby talk lends further support to the theory that what we're looking at here is man-on-boy love. And note the possessive overtone: "Whose duckydoodle is oo?" Ensconced in the clammy embrace of his pederast, the red-headed catamite is mere property -- a 19th century gimp, if you will.

Finally, the word "duckydoodle." Rhymes with "sucky noodle." Coincidence? I doubt it.

Well, the only reference to Ducky Doodle that I can find that makes any sense is an old children's book from around the early 1950s.

http://www.biblio.com/books/7180272.html

Talking to this um... "interest" of his by a nickname from a children's book also does not bode well.

I'm speechless. That card looks straight up weird.

Isn't it obvious? She's praying for a duckydoodle.

Not sure what's going on there, but his red nose indicates a severe booze problem.

Creepy pedophilia. I mean, pedophilia creepy by pedophilia's standard.

Something that's illegal in most states. And Canada.

Nevada is still good to go, though;-)

Let's see...This is obviously why "red-headed step-children have been treated so badly throughout history.

Notice the stick-thin left ankle on the "male", this is apparently the result of fighting the family dog for daily sustanance (and losing). If you look at the right ankle, you see that it is actually missing! He must bring his shoe along just out of nostalgia.

Please notice the eyes on the "male". Observe the great difference in size. It would be safe to assume that he must have great difficulty with spacial orientation and depth perception...not to mention LOUSY taste in women.

As to the "female". No lips. She also seems to be praying that her beau never goes to the eye-doctor, lest he actually get a good look at his sweetie, or "duckydoodle", what ever the hell that means.

Another question...what kind of tree IS that behind them? The trunk is thick, and the foliage is sprouting very low on it. Perhaps there is some kind of plague or disease in the air around the town. Did this card from come from Chernobyl? That would explain the difference in eye size on the "male" and lack of lips on the "female". The tree also seems to be leaking some sort of gray liquid...maybe it's the "female" that's leaking...who the hell knows?

I'm afraid I'd have to give this card a thumbs down. I'll have to give my "duckydoodle" something else this year.

You all are unnecessarily cruel.

This picture shows two people who have probably been shunned their entire lives because they aren't "pretty". Somehow, in this lonely, mean-spirited world, these two found each other.

Are you all so bitter that you would poke fun of these two lonely hearts that at last are no longer doomed to walk alone?

Not all of us out here are so lucky. We get laughed at and ignored just because we didn't win life's lottery and were'nt born cute and acceptable.

Go ahead and laugh at these two, if it somehow makes you feel better. They wouldn't give a damn if you do. It's nothing that they haven't heard all their lives. These two have a special bond that none of you could possibly comprehend. They have each other and that is all they ever wanted.

A life is made, not from momentous events, but from small, quiet, "insignifcant" tender moments like the one shown above.

The empty space at their side has been filled.
No longer will they shed tears when they see a couple, longing for someone...anyone to share their lives.

I understand that pain. I live with it everyday, and most likely will until my empty heart beats it's last, never knowing the simple touch of love, or of the sublime joy from the embrace of a kindred soul. I stare at the stars and the cold, distant moon, wondering if "she" is out there. I try to pretend that it isn't painfull to be so alone, but the truth comes out in drips and drabs until it bursts forth in a soul-killing emptiness that threatens the very sanity that I grasp with my fingernails.

Go ahead and laugh. It's nothing we haven't heard before.

Those two people are about to copulate. I can smell the fornication. Sinners. Duckydoodle? You would like to know wouldn't you?

I'm not sure, but I'd bet the rest of the conversation includes the sentence "And don't tell any grown-ups what we just did."

<wipes tear from eye>

Le Cour, dude, that was so ... pathetic!

For Le Cour

It could also be a case of sideshow-freak love: World's Tallest Man and The Amazing Midget Woman. I mean, the guy does kind of have the proportions of an acromegalic....

yeah, I keep telling myself that. It's a lot more palatable than the other options.

I'm with ricki on "sideshow freak love"... the other alternatives are just too icky.

I was reading Le Cour's post as performance art, myself. I mean, were he serious, wouldn't he at least spell his name (which I'm translating as "the solitary heart") correctly, e.g., "le coeur solitaire"?

It was almost like reading the lyrics to Conway Twitty's hit, "Lonely Blue Boy," or perhaps it should be "Le garcon bleu -- et solitaire."

After all, nothing says bathos like gratuitous French.

Le cour, don't listen to the hecklers. I hear what you're saying because I've felt that pain myself.
You are one cool dude, and definitely the most empathetic guy on this thread.
Don't worry. "She's" out there and once"she" reads your post, "she'll" find you (and then you'll be in deep . s. ..)
Anyway. are you sure your first name isn't spelled "Liquor."?

Le cour, Bingo Little,

Please do not breed.

You all are unnecessarily cruel.
This picture shows two people who have probably been shunned their entire lives because they aren't "pretty". Somehow, in this lonely, mean-spirited world, these two found each other.

Le Cour,

Just like Michael Jackson and little boys with cancer!

There ain't wrong with the picture. The perspective is quite clear. The picture may seem weird though, but it's definitely a boy and a girl or a man and lady for that matter. No doubt about it! How can someone be so cruel? What's wrong with a boy prefessing love with a girl? This is not pedophile... just a freak love! You know a normal guy falling in love with a small or midget lady...

Here is what is OBVIOUSLY happening in the picture: Crispin Glover has drugged Danny Bonaduce, put him in a dress, and is now going to devour him.

As for "Le Cour Solitaire"... wow. You gave us a lot to think about. Or at least laugh at. In the mean-spirited manner that only us pretty people can manage of course. For example: "Are you all so bitter that you would poke fun of these two lonely hearts that at last are no longer doomed to walk alone?". Answer- Yes, but only if it is really funny, and the people in question are adequately freakish. Point #2- "Not all of us out here are so lucky. We get laughed at and ignored just because we didn't win life's lottery and were'nt born cute and acceptable". Counterpoint- You aren't laughed at and ignored because you aren't attractive. It's because you are pathetic, annoying, and troll message boards looking for a chance to chastise people with senses of humor just because you are going to die alone and friendless in a crappy appartment that smells of pee.

That having been said, I could see your point if it was a photograph of some ugly people. But it is a crappy drawing of an obviously psychotic pedophile on the verge of devouring a young man in a dress. Suck it up, get out of your mom's basement, and stop reading so much Poe. And before I forget... Happy Valentines Day!!!