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Prepare for Death!

As a weather/storm junkie, the first thing I did today was bring up the forecast. I clicked the scrolling blizzard warning and got this piece of alarming information:




You know why they put that alarmist, over-the-top warning there? Because there are people who do not heed safety advice. They think they are invincible. They think they can handle anything. So nothing matters to them - not icy roads, blinding snow, thick fog - nothing.

I'm a precautionary person. I like to be prepared for any inevitability. I also like to make sure I don't put myself in situations where I could be in harm's way. This is why I have closets filled with non perishable canned food. It's why I keep a box of albums by my door and a baseball bat by my bed. Armageddon, zombies, maruading band of gang bangers - I'm ready for anything. And those people who scoff at warnings and omens will be knocking on my door looking for food and shelter when the bad things happen. And I will laugh. I've only got enough Spaghettio's for my family, bud. You're on your own. Why don't you try eating Johnny over there? He died because he ignored the warnings!

So my neighbors and a few of my relatives will insist on going outside when the local news people have clearly stated that you will lose all sense of direction if you go out in this storm. But no, they need to go to the store or keep an appointment or just prove that they have large, steel balls and 18 inches of blinding, freezing, wind blown snow isn't going to turn them into pussies! And they'll end up like Guy Pearce in Ravenous, or like this idiotic couple, while I'm enjoying the view from the window of my toasty warm house.

I guarantee you that tomorrow's Newsday will bring tales of stranded motorists (the woman who just had to go to Michael's craft store or the group of friend who just had to have McDonald's), massive car pile ups and people complaining that their streets weren't plowed fast enough. Where were you going to go in sixteen inches of snow, anyhow, buddy? Just sit the fuck down, turn on the tv and grab yourself a beer (I'm looking at you, Lew*). Don't give the emergency services people any more work than they'll already have just because you have a desire to be a Darwin award candidate.

Now, I'm going to secure my property and the lives of my family members. Plenty of books, movies and board games to go around. Lots of junk food to feast on. And we all have our own gaming systems so we can disperse to our separate rooms when we eventually get on each other's nerves. And that is why my emergency preparation box includes a couple of bottles of wine and a huge container of Excedrin Migraine.

I'm going to spend the rest of the day being one of those freaks who calls in reports to the local news station. The rest of you in the path of the storm? Stay home so I don't have to read about you in the paper tomorrow.

[And you warm weather people want to point and laugh at us, here's a bunch of webcams where you can watch Mother Nature take a dump on us]

*My brother in law


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We got a lot less than 14 inches overnight, and Milwaukee DPW knows how to deal with it. This is fortunate, because in fifteen minutes, 6:45 AM, I'm heading out to get something a little more valuable than craft supplies or burgers. I'm heading out to pick the wee wifey up from work.

Well, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Be careful out there.

The skitching's gonna be great tomorrow!

We don't have as much snow here in Michigan, but I just kissed my hubby and boys goodbye - they have their Cub Scout "Klondike" today (you know, cold weather survival stuff.) They might need it today.

It's winter outside! :) We had 9" of snow (latest first >1" in 114 years) last night on our driveway by the time it was over (Mpls/St Paul); I've shoveled it out, the city plow hasn't been by yet, and I'm going to my Minnesota Futurists meeting. Then I'm going shopping.

Stay safe, those of you who don't normally deal with bizzards.

You're ready for a maurading band of gang bangers? Does Justin know this?

We're supposed to get a big dump of it down here in DC, too. We can manage the snow okay if the District gets out in front of it and plows. If not, we're up a creek.

Personally, I don't mind it so much UNLESS THE POWER GOES OUT. Which it does here during inclement weather. Picture the entire neighborhood parked at the local Starbucks to charge cell phones, watch DVDs on laptops, and use hair dryers (in the bathroom). It's hilarious and has happened twice in the last two years.

Like you, I'm waiting--nay, anticipating--Monday's SI Advance and their various stories of idiots who did dumb things outdoors during a blizzard.

It restores my faith in the belief that, while I'm no genius by my standards, but Lord Almighty! There enough schmucks surrounding me that I may well be one in comparison to the rest of the crowd! ;-)

Sadly.. and call me crazy, but I'm jealous. We dont seem to get storms like that here anymore.. not since 97/98. I'm amazing it didnt totally bypass Minneapolis - although Fargo/Grand Forks always seem to get dumped on still. Must be about time my husband decided it was time to go back to NJ. Good luck Michele, stay safe.

Serious snow envy from the Deep South, here. It's going to be gorgeous, I'm sure. Y'all have fun.

Made it back home just fine thank you, and found that my neighbor returned my favor from midnight, and snowblew my sidewalk.

No reports af accidents; expressways running "at" the limit, only one abandoned car on an exit ramp. Plows will have gotten to our sidestreets by dark.

Skitchers should know what it means when those two white lights straddling my license plate come on.

I guess I'm one of those warm weather people, but I certainly won't be pointing and laughing. I'll be more wistfully wishing I was there. Snow and ice can certainly be a pain in the ass--especially when you work retail and they expect you to come into your job anyway--but I still love snow. A good snow storm is just lovely and staring out the window as it falls is a great joy. So is going outside while it's still fresh, before everyone has tramped through the snow (maybe not so much an issue when you're getting 14-21 inches) and enjoying that deep quiet that comes with the storm.

But alas, I live in Washington state, where snow is quite rare. So I'll be over here being kind of jealous, despite all the problems such a snowstorm would bring for me.

...I'm a SoCal boy who did two years in Detroit (at GM), so I have some appreciation for lots of snow in a short time. You have my sympathies.

But, wtf is "skitching"??


A huge part of my childhood. Wonder I'm still alive.

Here in Milwaukee we're snowed in with no marshmallows for our hot cocoa, so I had to send my wife out to get some. Honestly, I don't know how the single fellows survive in this weather . . .

Webcams, one of the best things about the internet.

Meeting went fine. Attendence was down a little at the start, but all of the regulars were there by 11:00. Universal declaration that the roads were in fine shape, it was idiots driving that was putting people into the ditches.

Look, people, to drive in snow safely you've got to SLOW DOWN and BACK OFF.

Got home, Mr. City Plow had come by and scraped up the street and dumped my share on the end of my driveway. I went to get my snowthrower, chatted with a neighbor for a couple of minutes, heard noise at the end of the drive, another neighbor had just blown us free of the plow dump.

Neighbors, a good thing.