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the diary, day seven

No, I didn't cave. I just kicked the couch a few times and went to bed.

Today at 2pm will mark one week. Not only am I really going through with this, but I'm doing it with conviction, and without stuffing food in my mouth ever two seconds.

Sure, my family hates me and small animals fear me. But that's nothing new. And they'll learn to adjust.

However, today marks the day where I should move past the cranky bitch stage and welcome myself to the world of hacking up my lungs in tiny, yellow chunks. Mmm.....lung butter.


Ughh. Nasty mental image to what's really in I can't believe it's not butter

Good luck. I'm rooting for ya.

I won't offer anymore pointless advice but would it help you to know that my natural father never quit smoking and died a nasty death after three heart attacks?

It might make you feel better to know that you're better than some and, as reality TV has shown us, that's all that matters.

Hint from years of pneumonia: it can help to lie face-down on the bed with your head over the edge and a bowl under your face to catch the junk you're coughing up. Walks in the fresh air (even if frigid) can help, too.

You're going to get through this, Michelle.

Good to see you taking all of this with the requisite black humor necessary.

Celebrate the small victories as much as you want or need to. They count and in the end they add up to larger victories.

One day at a time, eh? One advantage of battling dependency is that you can't afford to look too far ahead, because thinking in terms of giving up something that was enjoyable (on some level) forever is a bad thing. Just like drinking Jobu's rum. Very bad.

You will be a much better kisser after this.


Keep going..It gets better each day...


Fabulous! Congratulations...I've haven't made it more than 24 hours without smoking since the day I smoked my very first one.

Some advice given to my husband was this: when you feel a craving - go drink a 1/2 glass of orange juice. He was a grump at first, but after a couple of weeks he was better, and well before the end of a month, he was over his cravings. The OJ trick might not work for everyone, but it's worth a shot. Good luck!

Congrats and good luck Michele.

you can do it. go!

I have noticed that the No Smoking diary has stopped. Maybe, that is because the jonesing has stopped. Believe me there still will be those sudden albeit brief urges to light up. Be vigilant and prepared to resist, particularly so in these next 40 days.

I just read an article on treating tobacco use and dependence that included the statement: "Relapse is consistent with the chronic nature of tobacco dependence, not a sign of failure."

Lastly, you deserve congratulations for your perseverance. I am sure that the judge will consider this when reviewing the other charges.