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caption, please

[A young Mr. Gates strikes a pose - click for bigger. Via Fark]

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» 2005 ConservativeLife Caption Contest #05 from General Politics
I have no words to describe today's contest - OK I have plenty but I will hold off for a bit. Winners will be announced next Monday PM. There is still time for the Fuzzy Hats Blogger Bonus Caption Contest. Also check OTB's Caption Contest [Read More]

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Welcome my son....to the Machine!"

"I'm thinking of your money."

"Because 240k of RAM is all the sexy we'll ever need."

"In 20 more years, I'll finally get laid."

I'm too sexy for my shirt.

NOT.

This our latest feature. We call it the Blue Screen of Death.

"Don't Pee in the IBM XT"

I'm really, really stoned right now ... let's just say it's done and ship it.

Just imagine. With this machine, you can replace me with whatever turns you on.

Oh wait, no nevermind. Just stare at me instead.

Nothing gets between me and my intellectual property...

Oy vey! No work and all steal make Bill a dull boy!

He's dreeeeamy!

Shouldn't all screens be blue?

May I interface with your floppies?

I may look like a bug but actually I'm a feature.

Linux? Debian? Staroffice? That's OK I'll be right here...waiting.

God,I love my Depends!

"I'm sorry, were you saying something? I was just thinking about buying your entire family and putting you into forced servitude wherein you will wear a metal bikini."

BILL: Hmmm, maybe combining "micro" and "soft" in the name wasn't such a good idea.
HIS ONE EMPLOYEE: The name might keep you from getting any before the mid-90s or so.
BILL: Maybe I need a virile name, like Member or Wang. Yeah, Wang!
EMPLOYEE: That's taken.
BILL: Oh crap! I should have never dropped out of college!
EMPLOYEE: Don't worry, computers are for nerds. They revel in it.

Its small, its soft - I'll call it Microsoft! Hey good name for the company too.

Game over. Stephen Macklin wins with the "Blue Screen of Death" caption. I spewed a very nice cabernet through my nose.

Hey, baby, wanna program tonight?

Floppy? Naaaah - it's a hard drive...with plenty of RAM.

Dude who made the hash brownies?

This is the picture that once dug up, gave Steve Ballmer complete control of Microsoft (not to mention endless ribbings of 'His Highness' in the board room).

"I shall call it...Mini Me."

"Simpletons. You're mine. You are SO mine."

FORMAT C:

'I have a dream that some day programmers will be so respected that people will actually pay them money to write software'

This is strangely cute. I am such a dork.

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful."

No, no, Bill... I said we should have the ICONS sit on the desktop...

"If Ballmer yells 'GILLIGAN!' at me one more time..."

"You know how to whistle, don't ya? You just put your lips together and, blow".

"Admit it, you think my hips are hot."

"Our plans for the future include making money on something besides Office and Windows, but it's still just speculation at this point."

Bill: I'm gonna own the world. Then you're gonna want to sleep with me.

No. Really. I'm gonna own the world.

"You want it baby, I got it! Oh yes I know you want it! Every hot square inch of me, ESPECIALLY what I keep in my back pocket."