« 2 down and whole new layout to go | Main | curtain call »

here, piggy piggy

We've all remarked at one time or another how adult life is no different than high school - whether at work or elsewhere. I was talking to Allah about this and he said Is high school the way it is because kids are kids, or because kids are people? I wonder if we're just destined to always wind up in some Lord of the Flies scenario.

Comments

I was talking to Allah about this and he said Is high school the way it is because kids are kids, or because kids are people?

I never stop finding it amusing that if we said something like that any place other than the blogosphere and people would back away slowly, desperately trying to avoid eye contact.

Anyway, if we're gonna play out Lord of the Flies I call Ralph.

Hah. I told Michele she should have posted an icon of a bong or a lava lamp with this one.

Behold, the power of Allah! He called forth graphics.. and there were graphics.. and Allah saw that the graphics were good.

The difference between adult life and school life is this: I enjoyed school.

I don't think it's inevitable. I think that scenario tends to come about whenever success is based on popularity. If you watch a pro football game, guys spend three hours trying to rip each other's heads off, then after the game they shake hands, shoot the breeze and pose with each other for pictures. That can happen because the winner was determined by open competition with an agreed-upon, transparent set of rules.

It's when popularity is the prime determinant for success that all the worst human traits tend to come to the surface. That's why high school tends to be an unpleasant experience for many of us, but if similar circumstances come to exist at some later date, the hellishness also returns.

wonder if we're just destined to always wind up in some Lord of the Flies scenario.

Memo to ABC: more "Lost" blog-ad dollars mean more eyeballs ... Wednesday Nights at 8:00.

Dear Michelle,

I witnessed a funny but unsurprising instance of a need of groups to "kill Piggy!". It was during Special Forces exercise and it went like this

"One afternoon our Gs ambushed a Humvee with one of their Lieutenants and a driver. The LT was declared dead, but the driver became a POW. Now, in addition to our team of 10 guys another SF guy from our unit was acting the part of guerrilla chief for our ex-mechanics. I mentioned that our guys had transitioned from a bunch of rear echelon mechanics to their own tribe of killers.

This led, inevitably, to a need to kill “Piggy”, and the poor Humvee driver had no idea that he had just assumed that role. The ambush was not planned and when it went down none of us were with our guerrillas. This lack of supervision led them to go a “little” apeshit. The first thing they did was strip the kid to his underwear and stake him spread-eagled on the ground. Not good, but not that bad so far, but from there it was all downhill. They figured they would interrogate him and gain some valuable information so they started to put
the screws to him. They collected some of their snake carcasses, and skulls and began threatening to poison him
with a vial of habu venom, which was actually oil for the guns. Still not completely over the edge yet, but they are definitely dangling their toes. They got out their snake stickers and threatened to cut his balls off if he didn’t talk.

Now the kid was definitely worried but he figured this was an official military exercise and they couldn’t actually hurt him could they. Right?

Well after exhausting their repertoire of ridiculous threats they went to get their chief, who was a reasonably senior guy from another company in our unit. At this point he should have been the voice of reason and told them to untie the poor fucker and give him his clothes back. It didn’t quite go down that way though.

Hal lost his ever lovin’ mind
and joined in the torment of “Piggy”. He even upped the ante and pulled out his .45. Now he wasn’t a complete
lunatic, so he had dummy rounds, which look exactly like live ammo. He started really fuckin’ with the kid and threatening to shoot him if he didn’t cave. He bent down and showed the kid as he loaded the dummy ammo in a magazine and puts the magazine in. He then stuck the barrel right in the middle of his forehead and jacked a round into the chamber. At this point the kid cracked wide open and started bawling. He gave up his name, address,
girlfriend, mom’s maiden name and everything he knew about his unit and their defenses. Now at first this seemed like a major coup for us when we heard all they found out, and we called in all the info to our higher headquarters.

But later all our guerrillas were talking about the G chief and how he made that poor fucker cry. Hal couldn’t contain himself and was bragging about sticking his gun in the kid’s face. By this point we had released the kid and he was
back with his unit and not too long after that we got a radio call telling us to send our now ex-guerrilla chief to the nearest landing zone for a helicopter ride to the rear. He got ample opportunity to explain why he thought holding US Marine privates at gunpoint was a good idea to the sergeant major and we had a similar conversation with our tribe.

Cordially,

Uncle J
www.unclejimbo.com

Stop talking about me, bitches.

I think it's both, really. Kids in High School are young adults who haven't learned to control the worst aspects of their own personalities yet. They're all hormones and nerves and insecurities. We keep those as we age of course but we mellow. I'm nowhere near as insecure as I once was, nowhere near as concerned about what others think of me, but those traits are still there. If they weren't I wouldn't be human, ya know?

I know people who loved High School. I always look at them funny.

I know people who loved High School. I always look at them funny

It was a lot easier to enjoy school here in the UK as we didn't seem to have all the cliques you have over there in the US (at least in my school). Jocks and nerds mixed with stoners and cheerleades, and there was very little tension between groups.

Even today my two closest friends are the captain of the football team and the biggest nerd in the computer club from my youth.

God, I loved high school.

That should be cheerleaders (not that we have them in the UK).

"Blogs are high school with hyperlinks." -- Me

"Jim Treacher has always baffled me." - Me

Ok... I loved high school..

But that's because I was a hardcore theater geek and we took a large measure of pride in being different.

Of course, I look back at those years, too, and wonder how I lived through it all while being really really stupid.

Youth IS wasted on the young.

Amen to that.

What am I saying? I'm only 23.

I failed my final exam in high school--social studies--because I got halfway through it and then realized..."After I hand this in, I can leave here and never, ever come back."
I immediately did so.
I hated school. Real life has been much better, IMHO.

"I was talking to Allah about this and he said Is high school the way it is because kids are kids, or because kids are people? "

Well, teenagers are people who should be adults but are deliberately educated slowly (three months off every year from kindergarten through high school? What's up with that?) and required by law and custom to imitate children.

This tends to piss them off, understandably. (Or, as their elders characterize it, they tend to be "moody")

Since someone else is covering for you, doing stupid stuff for the fun of it doesn't cost as much as it would someone independent. Since you can't shorten your sentence by responsible behavior, there's not that much of a payoff.

So people in that position tend to act like, well, what we think of as "teenagers". If they had marketable skills and could move out on their own and better themselves and if their parents weren't standing by to get them out of whatever jams they got themselves into, they'd be acting pretty much like 20-somethings do. And they'd be much happier overall. And much less likely to have children out of wedlock (although somewhat more likely to have children inwedlock and be able to support them... not an altogether bad thing as far as I can tell)

Ken seems to have hit on something...I agree with him wholeheartedly. Think back to how young men and women use to leave home at age 14 or sometimes even younger and make their way in the world just fine. My husband's maternal grandmother emigrated from Norway at the age of 16 alone...to a "whole 'nother country"...it's mind-boggling how we persist in keeping our children "children" for so dang long. Notice how the soldiers are referred to by some as "our children", "the boys and girls in uniform", etc. Yuck. And then we seem to think it OK nowadays to remain childlike FOREVER. Dressing in adolescent t-shirts and crap...I think that life just isn't hard enough anymore. That's why it's possible to remain immature waaay past when you ought to be taking life seriously.

I always told my kids that what makes you a successful high school student is the exact the opposite of what makes you a successful adult.

This was brought home to my youngest son who matured a little slower than some of his classmates when he went back to his class reunion.

He stopped for gas and ran into one of his chief tormenters, the former Big Man on Campus, who was pumping gas into his Jag. He was fat and bald too. Sweet moment.

Those of you who think life is like high school haven't grown up yet. That may be good or bad depending on what kind of life you want.

The difference is, when you had to do something in high school that sucked, you didn't get paid for it.

You got Allah to come out of hiding just for you? Impressive, but what has he been up to? ( No good, I'm sure. )

for me, the real hell was junior high school. (I guess kids matured faster in my town?).

The person who observed that high schoolers have not yet learned to control the more negative aspects of their personalities is spot-on. Unfortunately, some people NEVER learn that.

I guess I'm lucky; I kind of liked high school. My parents took pity on me and sent me to a private school where most of the kids were as big geeks as I was (that seems somehow ungrammatical). It was a revelation not to be the least popular kid in school any more.

And I'm lucky now. I wound up in the sciences in academia, and it seems that in my department there are remarkably few people who failed to outgrow high school mentalities. I think most of us were the picked-on geeks who had rich inner lives despite the torment we went through at school, so we basically grok each other, and there's no one who feels an extreme need to assert dominance. We're all happy off on our own individual geeky pathways.

Yeah, what Sefton said.

Why isn't Allah posting, gol durnit?

The reason high school is the way it is... Because kids are people, and those people don't have to pay taxes or bills. They still have a home, complete with food, clothes, and video games. Adults only pick on those they envy, probably because they have an easier time paying taxes and bills.