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lesson of the day

There's nothing like going to Costco to reaffirm the idea that you're a misanthrope.


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Which is why I always send my wife... (she seems to handle people and crowds better than I)

Never, never, ever go there on a Friday night.

I hate shopping during the holidays. People act as if they have lost their minds. At least this year I'm not driving.

I am constantly amazed at how many impromptu family reunions occur in the main aisle of Costco.

I work at the Sheriff's Office and have suggested that next time we have a missing person that we check Costco first.

Oh, gawd, I hate that place. Don't even get me started about the whole checking-receipts-against-purchases-at-the-exit thang....

Or, as we refer to it here, the $200 store (cuz you just can't get out without spending that much)

I've had a business card with 'em since the early PriceClub days .. when all four girls were younger and at home it was a regular stop BUT only mid week RIGHT when it opened and the business hours.

I HATE shopping with crowds ... thank God I don't have a concealed weapon permit.

On the other hand, there's nothing like a trip to Wal-Mart to reaffirm your parenting skills.... because you'll come out knowing you're a freaking GREAT parent compared to the morons all around you.

....The Super WalMart here - especially after 11PM - is nicknamed the Mutant Magnet. That pretty much says it all.


My memory's going so I could be wrong, but I think one of my favorite old posts of yours described a typically hellish Costco encounter, or at least detailed what you would do to all the morons there if only there weren't those pesky laws against murder.

I feel almost deprived that I don't have Costco where I live. I only can share stories about the hell that is Super Wal-mart.


1. NEVER shop Costco on the 1st or 15th of the month (paydays). 2. NEVER shop Costco on weekends (see also 1. for a particularly deadly crowd combination)
3. NEVER shop Costco on Fridays (I never have, but I read Rox's comment and I'm always looking for good times not to go to Costco)
4. NEVER shop Costco during the Christmas holidays ...this should be a no-brainer ...combine this with 1. & 2., and you will discover existential hell (and deservedly so, and you should probably nominate yourself for a Darwinian Award)
5. NEVER shop Costco M-F during "normal business hours" (because it's full of business people pushing cart-"trains" piled monstrously high with stuff ...I mean, what do they drive there in: semi's? ten wheelers? what?)

So what's that leave you with?

Late evenings. 1/2 hour before closing, M-TH. Make a list. Push the cart FAST. Follow a plan. You can do it. One word: aerobic.

...and you just received the BEST Costco advice EVER. N/C.

Please, no applause.

Do NOT tell your friends. They don't deserve to know. Disloyal swine can't be trusted anyways. Let's just keep this amongst ourselves, shall we?

My daughter and I were at WalMart the other night in the soda aisle and she spotted a new item - 6 packs of 8 oz. soda. The cans are half the size of regular sodas and she and I joked how the pendulum is swinging. We've all been innundated with marketing aimed at selling us mega-sized everything, and now things are getting tiny.

I've noticed that Anna and her friends love 'little' things; the aisle where you can buy all sorts of sample-sized stuff for traveling is one of their favorite haunts.

I can only hope that this up-and-coming generation of consumers will reject the "I need the 10-gallon size of mayo!" mentality and that the days of warehouse shopping are moving towards the fate that awaited the dinosaurs of the past.

I don't even need a Costco membership to validate my case of misanthropy. I just have to drive on a road that's in the vincinity of a Costco!

Don't have a costco nearby but there's the superwalmart here in town.

I've learned when to avoid it. Usually shopping before 9 am on Saturdays and Sundays are the best time, because the mutant freaks are either still drunk, haven't managed to get their multiple kids into clothes yet, or are still in bed.

I have a friend who calls the first Friday of the month at the local wal-mart "Inbred Friday" because that's seriously what some of the shoppers look like - people out of every holler and dead-end alley in the tricounty area. Scares the hell out of me.

I go to the mall ONCE during the Christmas season (I either order my gifts from catalogs or buy stuff while I'm traveling in the summer) just to remind me why I do my shopping early.

the WORST time to shop at walmart here (other than the before mentioned Inbred Fridays, which could be an interesting sociological exercise if you're into such things) is between 4 pm and 7 pm. That's when the working folks get off work, pick up their kids from daycare, and need to get something towards dinner before going home. So you're dealing with tired adults suffering guilt over warehousing their children for the day, kids who have learned the Rules of Parental Manipulation, and on top of that, the walmart has decided that's the time of day all the checkers should go on break.

I've asked myself more than once why they build the stores in such a way that they are acoustically perfect to reverberate and magnify the screams of a toddler who's mom has just told him "no sugar smacks" or "I am not buying you a toy".


You got me thinking on shopping trends. Here in So. Cal it definitely looks like even if the Costco doesn't go the way of the dinosaur, malls just might.

WalMart at any time of day or night is the most depressing thing to experience. I just don't go to that place. Avoid Target on Saturdays (all day) and Sunday afternoons following church when entire families pack the aisles (I should say block the aisles), but don't seem to be getting around to actually buying anything. They're just hanging out.

Not sure if it matters, but I've never been to a Costco, and am not even sure I know where one is!

On the other hand, I am ol' pro at NYC Subway riding, so I am not a complete neophyte!

Even better: Social Security Office.