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Flaming Voodoo Time: Game 2

Last night's voodoo worked, but we had to sweat it out. I thought I'd up the ante today and really strike at the heart of the Sox, so to speak. voodoog2.jpg We are also planning on following the ritual I performed on back on September 18, when the Yankees pounded the sox 14-4. bq. I scoured the neighborhood for fallen branches. When I gathered one for every member of the Red Sox, I laid them out in my backyard and recited an old incantation I learned from the cousin of a friend of a friend in fifth grade, who swore she knew how to maim people using just her thoughts. I then - following specific directions obtained from the How to Keep the Red Sox Curse Alive handbook - painted the sticks red, coated them with lighter fluid and set them on fire. This set off a chain reaction of events that eventually destroyed our shed, my neighbor's swingset and killed seventeen squirrels, but, hey, it was worth it. Mmmm....squirrel kabobs, medium well. It worked so nice, gotta try it twice. I have nothing against killing squirrels in the spirit of the baseball playoffs. Besides, they would have ended up as road pizza at some point, anyhow. Which isn't half as tasty as squirrel kabobs. My neighbors, on the other hand...well, they're Met fans, so who cares? I've decided that it won't hurt to also hold the Ramirez doll aloft, poking it with heated pins while singing the Zombie's Time of the Season: What's your name, who's your daddy.... [Alternately, there's another plan that calls for a bottle of Jack Daniels to be swallowed in one swift gulp after the game in the event of a Yankee loss. This way, you can claim that a nasty hangover precludes you from talking about the game]

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Comments

While a 10-zip perfect game win would've been great for the humiliation involved, I kinda enjoy it when the Yanks get the hopes of the Sox and their fans up like they did last night. It makes the inevitable Sox loss all the harder for them to take.

Who's your daddy Pedro?

I. Hate. The. Yankees.

There, I said it. Butsing that voodoo that you do all over the place.

Better hope you go up by 8 early again, because I have a feeling Pedro will be more "inspired" than usual tonight.

Or, at least I HOPE he's more inspired. There are many in the Red Sox nation who believe that whole "daddy" thing was a ruse. A con job if you will, a set up. Wool over the eyes and all that.

Did you see him against Anaheim? 94-95 fastball in to the seventh.

Oh yeah....

yeah, yankee voodoo is crappy-ass walmart voodoo. It's no match for the power of the Red Sox. Seriously, that's a large group of scraggly, unbathed, bearded bastards and they probably smell like 80 different kinds of ass. Voodoo can't touch that. Besides, tonight we play at Fenway. It's on like a four foot bong.

"Seriously, that's a large group of scraggly, unbathed, bearded bastards and they probably smell like 80 different kinds of ass."

Hey leave France alone....

Sorry, shank, but tonight's shindig is in the Bronx. Not that it matters. This is going to be a long dogfight, and I can smell the Yankee's fear from here.

Actually its a good sign the Yanks won last night. They lost the first game last year and looked what happen. Look for Sox's to win tonight and claim home field advantage.

Love the Blog. HATE THE YANKEES

Hmmm...

1918 was 86 years ago.

What happened to Boston in '86?

'Nuff said

Only Sox fans are delusional enough to spin a loss as a good thing for their team.

Keep the faith, suckers!

As a presumably neutral observer (lifelong Cubs fan) of playoff activity, I must point out the "Ex-Cub Factor" devised by the late and lamented Mike Royko. He determined that since the Cubs were to the postseason what penicillin was to germs, the team with the most ex-Cubs on their roster would lose, being tainted with Cubness, which was synonomous with losing. Ahem. The Yankees have five ex-Cubs (Gordon, Heredia, Lieber, Lofton and Cairo). The Red Sox have two (Bellhorn and Mueller). Now we can scientifically determine the efficacy of the Ex-Cub Factor.

Chris, I think Roykos Ex-Cub Factor has a Red Sox Curse corollary that allows for Boston's unfortunate fate for all of eternity. The corollary states that the curse acts as a multiplier, so that RsubC is is actually 2RsubC. Which would bring us to 5 Ex-Cubs for the Yanks and 4 on the Sox. Once you take into account statistical error (six-sigma of course) the math concludes that it is almost a dead heat.

However, since the Yankees have already won the first game, it is now more likely they will win the series, strictly based on the odds of the Sox actually winning two games back to back.

Awe. Some. While I don't understand the folks leaving the Stadium last night in the fifth inning, I was happy to see the quality discourse displayed in the men's room, where Red Sox fans who braved hitting the loo were greeted with "All outta scrod!" among other things when they came in contact with Yankee fans. It's also excellent to see that inflation and rising oil prices have only driven up beer by $.50 since two weeks ago.

Game 2 will only be marred with one negative - that the Sox equipment manager won't be announced so we could boo him.

Hey, Tman?
She mutters incantations and tortures voodoo dolls but I'm the one you call "irrational" about all this?

(reality check on aisle 9, please!)

[Alternately, there's another plan that calls for a bottle of Jack Daniels to be swallowed in one swift gulp after the game in the event of a Yankee loss....]

Err, Michele? That's my pre-game ritual when these two teams get together. It totally voids the need for Tums. Followed by a case of beer (Sorry, Mr Adams; Killian's while your fellow Bostonians are involved).

Looks like Jobu needs a refill!

Actually, the Yankees have a major strategic advantage going for them right now because they as of 11:21 PM EST, have rendered Boston's strongest advantage--starting pitching--irrelevant. The Yankees are about to go up 2-0 having defeated Schilling and Pedro.

That isn't voodoo. That's reality.

Shilling shouldn't have been out there in the first place. Pedro was great tonight, but the Sox offense was NOWHERE to be found. Again. Argh.

Maybe since the Cubs have actually reached the postseason and had some small success the Ex-Cub Factor has lost some of it's potency. As far as the Red Sox being permanently cursed, who gives a rat's ass? They're in the AL where the pansy pitchers don't even hit.