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Four Color Politics

What do you get when you cross a supersize font Drudge headline and a Washington Times article? You get a five-grains-of-salt warning (that's one automatic grain for Drudge, one automatic grain for WT and three extra grains for the big font). Imagine a comic book scenario for a minute. You have two heroes (that would be Bush and Kerry, your mileage may vary) and one arch-enemy (that would be AQ). The arch-enemy can only kill one of those heroes, leaving the other one to reign supreme over the land that the enemy eventually wants to control. Or destroy. This could be at ten story arc, at the very least. You've got all kinds of sub-plots that will twist and turn the story, not to mention so many colorful secondary characters to flesh the story out. One of the twists would be the climax itself; does the enemy even choose one of the heroes to assassinate or does he throw a big, political wrench into the deal by assassinating a peripheral figure? Or, perhaps, is this all subertfuge by one of the heroes? Maybe there is no nemesis after all. Maybe the nemesis is just a black-op figment made up by said hero in order to garner votes. Maybe, just maybe, one of the heroes - the one who currently holds office - is assasinated by someone else before the arch-enemy can pull their trigger. All those plans put to waste by indecision. Nestled inside this series is a set of shorter stories, including Very Special issues such as Holiday in Cambodia and Rin Tin Tin. Ultimately, it comes down to the ending (which won't be so much as an ending as the beginning to Part II). Which hero of the story will be left standing and why? Or will the enemy be defeated before death makes its appearance? Will there be an October Suprise in the guise of a hail of bullets or crazed jihadist wearing the latest in suicide belt fashion? Or will that surprise come in the form of suprise appearance by a caped superhero, who swoops down to thwart the assasination attempt just in time? And will the masses rally around that person or will they claim he was just another player in a black-op theater production? This comic has it all. War, terrorism, political paranoia, the lunatic fringe and a social civil war. Haven't come up with a working title yet, but I already know how I want it to end. An image of the hero standing on top of the world, his foot resting on the chest of the dead enemy. And my hero says: Not even in the face of Armageddon. Never compromise.

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» POOR WASHINGTON TIMES from Blogumentary
Hitting the wires in abbreviated form, but so far not picked up by any major media outlets, is this story from the Washington Times: Bin Laden hints major assassination. The Washington Times is not a credible news source in my [Read More]

Comments

I'd read it!! I just wish our current world was a little less like a comic book!

comic book indeed. however, I don't think Americans need to fear an assassination attempt. It would be strategic suicide on AQ's part to follow through with compromised plans right? And since this is an intelligence related news-release, it's hard to tell how much of it is true. In theory, the US wouldn't release any valuable intelligence info so as to protect their true position. Besides, those AQ guys know that assassinating the Pres isn't going to stop the America they hate. Hell, knocking down the WTC didn't stop the America they hate. It wouldn't surprise me if they're sitting in their caves wondering what the hell they've gotten themselves into.

When you imaginine that the hero who gets assassinated is Aquaman, it doesn't seem so bad.

This would be too easy, if you catch my drift.

We know bin Laden likes big spectacles and is an asshole, but somehow I doubt he'd make a big, bold face proclamations of his intentions. He goes for the sneak attack.

If UBL says he's going to attack place X, I'd be on the look out for securing that place certainly, but I'd be also double time my intelligence resources in many other places, since I'd imagine he'd be using such info as a distraction.

Crisis of Infinite Jerks?

"Never give up, Never Surrender!"

There really are some deranged people out there.

Loved the tinfoil hat picture, though! Bill does such nice work documenting the loonies......

How about "War of the Weirds"?

Hey, Michele, did you vote for Gore? Then The Note at ABC is looking for you:

Via Vodkapundit:

Forget the fact that that we still can't find a single American who voted for Al Gore in 2000 who is planning to vote for George Bush in 2004. (If you are that elusive figure, e-mail us and tell us who you are and why: politicalunit@abcnews.com.)

Nah, I umm...voted for Nader.

Rorschach.

Email them anyway. And mention you're blogging the convention. Maybe they'll interview you!

Damnit all, Sandy, I was going to say the Galaxy Quest line.

Poo. >:(

That's ok, Toren knew what to say.