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Do Not Drink and Detonate

It is time once again to remind those of you with less than normal intelligence that fireworks are hot, dangerous and may burn you if you do not handle them properly. Trying to light fireworks after consuming a twelve pack of beer is not a good idea. For anyone. Accidents can happen, people and they will happen to you, especially if you mix drinking and detonating. Let's go over last year's warning: That should be enough to sway you. Now, you can go use the signmaker to make your own Fourth of July Warning Signs. It's Friday. Have some fun!


Listed below are links to weblogs that reference Do Not Drink and Detonate:

» I saw the sign from This Blog Is Full Of Crap
What's old is new again. Michele is trying to tempt people into doing that signmaker stuff again. Temptress! Wicked, wicked temptress! My old signs are available in the gallery, but I'll make a few new ones later today when I... [Read More]

» Iconic text messaging from protein wisdom
Michele, bless her, turned me on to this safety sign builder, which I'm sure I'll abuse regularly. Meantime, keep your arms and legs within the vehicle. Mikey's hungry, and when Mikey's hungry, he doesn't always stop to read the signs.... [Read More]

» Just say no to explosivo from Bozzy's World
Michele has some very sound advice for this weekend. Remember kiddies, fireworks may be fun, but jerking off is... [Read More]

» Just say no to explosivo from Bozzy's World
Michele has some very sound advice for this weekend. Remember kiddies, fireworks may be fun, but jerking off is... [Read More]

» Linkage from seldom sober
<Sober Post> Fireworks and Dead Kittens Michele, of "A Small Victory" fame, has an important reminder to those who will be using fireworks this weekend. </Sober Post>... [Read More]

» In which I treat this like a diary... from The Argus
There were many things yesterday that for some reason or another, I was unable to photograph. Let me tell you, humanity suffers as a result. First, I was upset my cards were full when the A-10s did a flyover at [Read More]


What? You mean people use explosives without alcohol?

Have you ever known anyone who lost a digit to fireworks? Here in The State Where Nothing Is Allowed (inside joke for residents), a.k.a., Mother, a.k.a. Minnesota, they only recently started allowing the sale of the tame, boring stuff. You know, sparklers and the ones that flip around on the ground. Playing with matchbox cars would be more fun (at 28). When I was a kid we used to cross the state line and get the fun stuff in Wisconsin.

But has anyone ever really known anyone first-hand who suffered disastrous results from fireworks... and didn't deserve it for their stupidity?

I do. Actually a couple. One guy lost the better part of a finger to an M80 with a bad fuse (he was actually sober and about as careful as one can be) and a good friend scarred up his face pretty badly bending over a 'dud' mortar (he was drunk and really stupid).

On the other hand, I grew up close to where our blog hostess lives and we're the same age, so she can vouch for the fact that LI around the fourth is (was? I've been away for more than a decade) a pyrotechnic festival from the middle of June until next week. I grew up blowing up mailboxes, frogs, the boat next to us and pretty much anything else we thought would make a nice explosion.

It's remarkable I don't know more people who got seriously injured. Sometimes you get lucky.

Do you know what the most common "last words "spoken in Wisconsin are?

"Here...hold my beer, and watch this!"

Of course, you can replace "beer" with "brandy old fashioned" or "brandy manhattan (aka, a Brown Mumbler)" and be just as accurate.

FYI...credit for the above goes to Jim Johnson on WLS-AM in Chicago. I could only wish to be that clever...


You're nuts! And I mean that in the nicest way. I like the graphic, although in all my years of exploding I never once considered that angle.

Lived in MN. for 8 years. Soooo! would ya like a sparkler?

The 'tards have ruined it for the rest of us.

Hmmmm... explosives....

One of our buds (a physicist and math TA at the U of A) turned Rita and I on to this site...

Grit Truck

So we started mounting solid rocket boosters onto toy trucks, cars, Barbies etc. and then packed the hulls full of fireworks. Except JetPack Barbie.

I taped the entire tawdry episode and posted it for all to see...

JetPack Barbie

"No fingers were separated from any hands during this event"