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Verizon Has Destroyed My Will to Breathe

They have sucked the very life out of me with their stupidity and surliness. Not only will I have no phone until Saturday at the earliest, but for some ungodly reason you cannot get cellular service in my house. Not even outside the door. You have to walk down the sidewalk and step into the street before you get a signal and even then it's iffy. This is where it would come in handy if life were like a video game and I could just power-up or find some bottles of life-giving potion under a tree. Or I could just close up my work, sit back and read this profile of Roger Simon. A good substitute for a power-up, I think.


Maybe it was a safehouse for the CIA at one time. Now the dots are beginning to connect ...

Why do you remain with Verizon, anyway?

I betcha if you ask right, den Beste will build you a cellular repeater! Engineering types are ALWAYS on the lookout for a way to show you how clever they are...and he's at the top of the clever engineer pile!

Can you hear me now?

Damn Mike beat me to it.

If you need your cell to ring indoors, you probably need a repeater. These are ridiculously expensive...I'm sure there must be a cheaper way!

Damn! Mike beat me to it!

Then JimK beats me to complaining about it!

Whoops. There is this. 150 bucks, seems like it might do the trick if hooked up to an outside antenna.

Two words: Sing Ular.
How much do you really use the landline? other than TV/broadband, there is no reason to be hosed to the locale.

Meanwhile, in backwards-ass Alabama, the move and utility hookups continue without a hitch, much the same as the closing went for a certain Red Sox fan. Karma?

You're mad? I can not tell you how envious I am. I would kill to be free of telephones and pagers for a few days.

I've actually taken back part of my life. I let my phone ring at home when I don't want to talk. And no, there is no answering machine.

I'm firmly convinced that within the next few generations, Darwin's theory will kick in and humans will be born with one ear replaced by a telephone headset... women will be first. (Sorry, is that sexist? I guess so. Sue me. You'll have to prove me wrong.)


Can you hear me now?

[whack] [screaming]How about now?!?!? Huh? Huh? [whack] Can you hear me now?!?!? [blam blam blam] Bwah ha ha ha!!! [sirens]

Yes, I'm a Verizon customer.

Honestly though, can you think of a dumber name for a company than "Verizon"? It ain't one that inspires confidence. That's the only choice we have here too (I didn't know there was another area of the country that was stuck with "Verizon" as their one and only dial-tone provider).

Not much I can do except offer my sympathies. Dealing with a bureaucracy on any issue that's important to you is rarely much fun...

Until someone builds you that repeater, here's a map of where to find decent cell service. Once one went to the mall to chase boys, now one goes to chase phone signals. Maybe you get reception in the comic book shop?

I have Cingular Wireless and I've found all of one dead spot in Florida. I'm sure there are more, but since I'm moving away, it doesn't matter.

They say the CEO of AT&T's wireless division can't get reception in his own house, and has to go out into the driveway.

And there's a whole street in west Orlando where AT&T is dead... my friend Jenni has to stand in a very specific spot in her backyard to talk to me.

I used to have Verizon, but it was too expensive.

Huh. In my town, Cingular coverage is nonexistent, but Verizon comes through OK. Can we swap coverage? :)

Hey, look: Verizon really truly is just that awful.

However, the problem is with my land line, not my cell line. Of course, the cell service. Of course, the cell signal in this house is non existent.

Rightly picked a Jessica.