Never underestimate the power of hair.
A bad haircut (or just a bad hair day) can really destroy your sense of well being. I am not even close to kidding about this. In fact, I have already written several times about hair trauma. To wit:
I'm having a Bad Hair Day. I'm not a vain person, by any means. However, Bad Hair is about more than just walking around looking like a blind person constructed a wig for you. No, Bad Hair encompasses the entire body, soul and mind of your being. It weighs you down, it makes you grumpy, it takes that last shred of human decency you had and shoves it over the cliff of dignity so you are left with an attitude that would maim the most hardened terrorists with just a glare from your frosty, evil eyes.
Bad Hair is not a bad coif. It's not a brush or comb away from sanity. It's miles and miles away from any sane place in the world. Bad Hair combines every aspect of your body, mind and soul, taking you on a strange journey from your mutterance of death wishes upon every person in the world to the sharpening of your fingernails so you can better gouge out the eyes of your co-workers.
So let's go, Meryl and Andrea (ed note: this was written on a day when Meryl and Andrea wanted to throw down). I'm waiting. As soon as someone nominates an entity, human or otherwise, who is deserving of our wrath, I am there.
And then there was something about taking my bad hair mood and working with it, channeling that anger to do...something.
I am Bad Hair Girl. Superhero to the sufferers of split ends, savior to the follicly challenged, avenger of the too-much-conditioner victims.
Here I come to save the Bad Hair Day. With blowdryer and hot oil treatment packed in my bag to take care of that hair, and my trusty spork-of-death and fists-of-rage ready to take care of your emotional outlet needs.
Yea. So if anyone needs any sporking done today, I'm your gal. And until I figure out a way to dissipate this hair-rage, whatever long winded essay I had in mind for this morning will have to wait.
I wonder if their is such thing as a hair-rage defense in court?