« now playing | Main | What He Said »

kicking zombie ass for the Lord

I've read at least three articles already today about Dawn of the Dead v. Passion of the Christ at the box office. Zombies v. Jesus, which one will be the top moneymaker this weekend? The fight for number one!

That got me thinking. These two movies each bring in a different kind of audience. Each movie will make a (relative to the cost of the film) ton of money. Each will have taken a place at number one on the box office charts. And, most importantly, the movies share a common theme: rising from the dead! So I had a blockbuster idea, one that will combine the two disparate, yet large, group of movie goers who are fans of each film. One that will be able to suck the cash out of the pockets of both zombie fans and Jesus followers, bringing them together in a force so large, it will forever change the way blockbuster movies are made.

[click for poster size]

Yea, my Photoshop skills suck. But I still think it's a good idea.


Listed below are links to weblogs that reference kicking zombie ass for the Lord:

» It's two, two, two films in one from dustbury.com
Michele notes that the two biggest box-office phenomena so far in 2004 are The Passion of the Christ and the remake of Dawn of the Dead, and that got her... [Read More]

» All He Wants is Your Faith from Mythusmage Opines
You just knew it. Coming soon from Hurting Bad Fun Inc., The Passion of the Dead How do you think he harrowed Hell? sf: A Small Victory (sf: 'stolen from')... [Read More]

» Carnival Of The Godless #9 Is Here! from Unscrewing The Inscrutable
The ninth Carnival Of The Godless is up at Yeah Whatever, and it's a doozy. It's a large one with many excellent entries, and should be just the thing to ward off any zombie saviors during this Easter weekend.... [Read More]


Michele, you are a visionary. And your PS skills are just fine. Heh...how long 'till someone is offended by this?

Oh lord. I hope you were planning to get crucified today, babe.

With Ving Rhames as Pontius Pilate. I like it!

DotD is highly recommended, y'all. Just don't eat an hour before showtime, and stay through the closing credits.

Well, I don't know about the baby Jesus, but that'll sure as hell make Tammie Faye cry...

AIEEEE Mascara Flood!!!!!!!!!

Plus,they're both remakes....

It's kinda got a necropillial ring to it.

Hehehehehe. That's funny.

Michele, stop it! You're giving hollywood ideas! LOL

I would have rather seen "The Passion" go up against "28 Days Later." Now that's a zombie movie where the zombies play second fiddle in the threat department to human nature.

Would have given Christ something to do other than be crucified, eh?

Great poster, Michele!

From the heading, I thought sure this post was going to be about this: http://www.ebaumsworld.com/divine.html

Now that's just good stuff.

I've often considered how great it would be if Wes Craven did a sequel to the gospels. The idea of "Attack of the Zombie Christ", "Return of the Zombie Christ" and "Zombie Christ: Ressurrection" could be brilliant, if done properly.

"The Last Putrefaction of Christ"

Jim, Hell is not on your itinerary when you die. I don't think Satan would want you anywhere near the place.

Of course, Jesus is, in his own way, a zombie -- the walking dead -- which makes that whole eating-his-body-drinking-his-blood thing just a little more unsavory.

It also means the only way to stop Jesus is to shoot him in the head. Who's with me?

Hey, they started it!

And Phil wins the golden handbasket!

"Coming soon to a theater near you....
When Jesus said 'Eat of my flesh, drink of my blood' he never thought he'd be answered from beyond the grave... It's Christ versus Carrion in a golgothan gorefest of biblical proportions! Here's what the critics have to say about 'Passion of The Dead':
Gene Siskel: 'Graaahhh..mm..AArrgghh..Narrghh'
Roger Ebert: 'Dear god! Gene! You're alive! A bit manky, but alive! Gene...?'
Roger Ebert: 'No, Gene, no! Stop! Arrrgh! Aiiieeee....*'"

I am all for seeing the Son of God lay out a little double-barrelled boom-stick salvation on the walking dead. Chainsaw Jesus vs the Moon Zombies!

Are you kidding. Even under 3.5 all he has to do is glare at a zombie and it disintegrates. Jesus don't need no hardware on no stinkin' zombies.

I'm with Sortelli! "Behold, I do not come to bring peace, but a sword - top of the line, Gallic steel, with an India-rubber grip - YOU GOT THAT?!"

(primitive screwheads...)

Why do I feel like I'm going to hell now that I laughed at that?

It's been done.