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Acme, the President and Me

The president is coming to town tomorrow. After the groundbreaking ceremony for a 9/11 memorial, he will attend a campaign fundraiser/dinner at the park's restaurant. earthpills.jpgI'd like to get close enough to the dinner/rally to at least get one photo. Of course, I could have just paid to get in legitimately, but I didn't have $2,000 to spare. So, my plan of attack. How will I get myself into the restaurant without attracting attention or landing in Gitmo? When in doubt, go to Acme. Some ideas: * The air drop, I can land safely in a tree top and get a birds-eye view of the prez. * Release the Acme bees, thus sending the secret service men scurrying about, so they won't notice me sneaking into the restaurant. * Put on the Acme female roadrunner outfit. Nobody can resist a sexy roadrunner. When one of the agents comes over to hit on me, I can knock him out with an anvil, switch clothes with him and just act non chalant, like I really belong in that size 42 black suit. * Use the giant kite kit to fly onto the roof of the restaurant, drop down a vent, put on a chef's hat and mingle in the kitchen. * Use the earthquake pills to cause a medium sized tremor, hop into my superhero's outfit, whisk the president off to safety and become a hero. Or, I can just skip all that and go with the tried and true invisible paint. If none of these tricks work and I don't get in, I'll just head over to the protesters and give them a clue collecter.

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Comments

What? You don't have a picture with you and the President? Even my babysitter's got one.

When I meet the president, it'll be the batsuit all the way, baby.

batsuit!

Well, I'd have to suggest starting off with not saying "plan of attack" when discussing what you're planning on doing =)

but does Mr. Prez know that Mike Patton and Rahzel are in town tomorrow night?

Michele, Dubya usually stops after leaving the car and before getting in. Just work your way to the front of the crowd and you'll get your pic.
He's a pretty nice guy, I met him during his first run at Governor. He spent most of an hour talking with, and listening to, a group that ranged from three to ten as people came and went outside a County Republican Convention. The demands, both time and security, are greater now, of course. Still, if you get to the front of the crowd at the rope line, you'll get your picture and a handshake.

I think all you need is the giant spring attached to the giant boulder that will shoot you into the restaurant right past the Secret Service and into Dubya's arms.

Because you know you want him, don't you?

If you have any interest in "keepin' it real," you've gotta employ an anvil at a certain point.

[Sing this to the tune of "The Roadrunner Theme"]

That blog lady's really a crazy gal,
Dreamin' up schemes 'cause she really wants to be his pal,
Poor George Dubya never bothered anyone,
Just tryin' to campaign's his idea of havin' fun.

George Dubya,
That blog lady's after you!
George Dubya,
Get your picture taken too!

Jeff:

Not a good idea. The way these things usually work out, the anvil will land on her.

I vote for the Lady Roadrunner outfit. And of course pictures are a must with that one, but then you knew that anyway, right? ;)

Just give the SS your credit card and book a night's stay in the Lincoln bedroom.

Complimentary continental breakfast and wake-up call If Neil Bush is there, free whores. And if Noelle Bush is there, you can do lines off her butt!

Me, I want to see the invisible paint being applied; this stuff has always aroused curiosity in me. (I mean, do you have to mix it up in the can? And if you do, does it adhere to the stick you mixed it with? And if you do manage to apply it to your entire body, and somehow the inevitable fluids - blood, sweat, tears, less-mentionable stuff - manage to escape, will you be able to tell?)

Uh Vince,

The President that had whores and rented the Lincoln bedroom has been out of the White House for over three years.

And making fun of a recovering drug abuser is soooo humorous.

Loser.

JFH, I recommend you read the news. Bush had been putting up campaign contributors too.

http://www.newsday.com/news/nationworld/nation/ny-usnite11q3703355mar11,0,1100461.story?coll=ny-nation-big-pix

Or try this tiny version:

http://tinyurl.com/2fdjy

Here is a quote:

Bush and first lady Laura Bush have invited at least 270 people to stay at the White House and at least the same number to overnight at the Camp David retreat since coming to Washington in January 2001, according to lists the White House provided The Associated Press.

...

At least nine of Bush's biggest fund-raisers appear on the latest list of White House overnight guests, covering June 2002 through December 2003 and/or on the Camp David list, which covers last year.

"When I meet the president, it'll be the batsuit all the way, baby."

Screw that....it's Dark Lord of the Sith time

Barry, nine fundraisers out of 270 overnight guests is a small number. It is normal for a politician's friends and business associates to be involved in fundraising. Especially one that has a history in business. Mr. Bush was in the awl bidness, as we call it here in Texas, then was the big wheel in our poor, benighted Texas Rangers ball club (goddamn Rangers).
Some, probably most, of that nine are lifelong friends.
When a person first runs for office, any office, the first thing politically active people do is to try to find mutual friends and get a picture of his (her's) reputation and personality. The second thing we do is to see who is raising money and support. If Dubya's friends and business associates weren't out there raising money it would have been because of one of two reasons, they thought he couldn't possibly win or they didn't trust him to win. I supported him during that first campaign because people I knew, either personally or by reputation were supporting him.
It's really odd. In his six years as Governor down here he had many Texans who disagreed with him politically, none of them ever questioned his integrity because though they, and sometimes I, disagreed with him, we know him. It says far more about those questioning that integrity than it does about him. Look who is savaging Dubya. Has anyone ever used the words Ted Kennedy and integrity in the same sentence? Ever? How about the plagerist Joe Biden? Robert Byrd, (D, KKK)? For that matter has one single exit poll found one Dem Primary voter listing integrity as a reason for voting for the Hee-row? If so, it escaped the news coverage.

Peter, the Rangers aren't the best thing to bring up while talking about integrity. Here are a couple of useful links on the use of eminent domain to increase the value of his investment:

http://espn.go.com/mlb/bush/timeline.html
http://www.austinchronicle.com/issues/vol17/issue19/pols.bush.html