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''OH MY GOD! IT'S JUST LIKE AFTER THE OJ VERDICT!'

I wonder how Martha will feel when she finds out she didn't even rate a Drudge flashing siren. I'm feeling kind of bad for Martha, so I'll do the right thing and make her feel like this was all worth it:
siren.gif MARTHA MAYHEM! FOUND GUILTY ON ALL COUNTS - HOMEMAKERS EVERYWHERE RIOT! PANIC IN THE STREETS OF THE HAMPTONS - K-MART LOOTED! [click for super k-mart size]

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Idea shamelessly stolen from Michele. Click the image for more: Allahu Akbar.... [Read More]

Comments

Before I got through the whole entry I figured the flashing light meant there'd be one hell of a blue-light special on Martha's merchandise at KMart.

aiyeeeeeeeeeeee! close the bold tag! close the BOLD tag!

Will she conduct her show from prison?

I have to say, if she did what she's convicted of doing, I'm really puzzled - the money was like chump change to the woman, it would be like me robbing a liquor store for $10 - as to why she felt the risk to her empire was worth it.

or maybe she just wanted a really spectacular way out of all the "domestic goddess" junk.

I don't know whether to feel more sad, because all the perfection was a big myth, or relieved that no one can be THAT good, that you can't make fresh cream scones AND harvest your own chamomile for tea AND embroider napkins for a tea party for your closest friends AND have your financial house in order...

you forgot "DRUDGE EXCLUSIVE MUST CREDIT DRUDGE!!"

Ricki, I guess she just believed her own public relations people.

I absolutely despise her. If I had 15-20 people in the background doing the work for me, I'd decorate and cook like her, too. As it is, I'm almost deliriously happy that the paper plates match.

Elizabeth
Imperial Keeper

All is lost! All is lost! No Justice, No Peace!

Seriously, though, it's amazing how well we put away "white collar criminals" (Heck, I just heard a juror state "we wanted to send a message, even though, THAT'S NOT THE JOB OF A JURY!!!), and yet OJ gets away, the Menendez Brothers, and probably Scott Petersen and Barretta.

The tragedy of the current court system isn't between rich and poor. It's between what's and who's popular at the time of the trial.

"I'm really puzzled... as to why she felt the risk to her empire was worth it."

I think the answer is that Martha is really nouveau riche. Her aggressiveness and her sense of personal infallibility got her incredible wealth, but she lacks the self-protection instincts of those born to old money. Basically, she made a rookie mistake and then compounded it by refusing to consider a deal. From her point of view, vastly more heinous stuff goes on all the time and nobody ever gets in trouble for it.

She just lost sight of the fact that - the concept of relative sin aside - she was directly participating in a serious crime. And she appears to have believed that everyone loved her, which was obviously very far from the truth.

The irony is that it would have been much harder to prosecute her for the underlying offense, which is why the government didn't even try.

No Justice! No Paninni!

The lesson we take from the Stewart conviction, is not that greed is bad, or that the cover-up is worse than the crime...but never, ever talk to the authorities without a lawyer.

The problem with this is that she probably never should have invested in the first place. I'm willing to bet that she was guilty of insider trading on that transaction as well.

Never, ever invest in your friends company. If you are friends with anyone on the board of directors it is virtually impossible to avoid being guilty of insider trading. Even asking a guy how his work day went, if his answer is "rough" several days in a row, and you sell your stock...you're guilty. If his wife tells your wife that he's having tough times at work, you have inside info. At the same time, if he really looks excited to go to work every morning...it's a tip.
And what do you expect a friend to do when they know a ton of your money is in their company when it's about to tank?

Re Ricki's comment, please it is "domestic diva" not "domestic goddess" (and when I am swept into power, presumably after some insider trading of my own with Mephistopheles, everyone of those writers who described Martha as the "domestic diva" is going to have glass balls hot glue all over their bodies and then be gilded).

P.S. that should be "hot glued to his or her body"

Yeah -- Roseanne <strike>Barr</strike> <strike>Arnold</strike> was the one who called herself a "domestic goddess."

cracks up that's great.

I was wondering why people hate her so much. When she was convicted people were happy. Why? My theory is that she is like a stern mother. As a kid you don't want to brush your teeth, so you resent mom for forcing you to. Same with Martha Stewart. She shows women how to cook right and how to have a nice, beautiful home. Women HATE her for this. Cooking nice dinners on well laid out tables in nicely decrated rooms costs time and effort. Women don't want to spend that kinda time and effort. They are tired doing their daily business without this too. But they have to make the effort, because men watch dear old Martha and look at their wifes and ask, Look, our house could be like that, but it is a dump, why? Martha gave men an example of how it could be. With Martha in jail, women sight with relief. No more bitch to put weird ideas about nice homes in the husband's head.

Being good at what you do isn't anywhere near as big a sin as knowing you're good at what you do, which can lead to the much greater sin of offering to help those who aren't as good as you, be better.

"...which can lead to the much greater sin of offering to help those who aren't as good as you, be better."

Y'mean like, a social worker?

Close enough.

"No more bitch to put weird ideas about nice homes in the husband's head."

Name one man (besides yourself, Ricky -- assuming you are married, and are a man) who gives two shits what Martha or any other woman says about fixing up the home.

"The irony is that it would have been much harder to prosecute her for the underlying offense, which is why the government didn't even try."

Right, Crank. As an Instapundit reader has pointed out, Martha Stewart has been convicted of covering up a crime the government can't prove she committed in the first place. So never mind Martha Stewart; let's focus on the problem that the rulers have long since found a "solution" to the problem of lack of evidence--and we "citizens" (i.e. subjects or, at best, voters) have accepted their overthrowing the evidentiary standard.

I'm glad that paragon of frigidity is going to Club Fed. And people wonder why her husband left her way back in...what was it, 1977??