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how to annoy alan in one easy lesson

I spent a good portion of my morning finding the ugliest Outlook Express stationery out there, and then tormenting Alan by sending him random emails. This is not the kind of thing one wants to see when one is extremely hungover, as Alan was when I talked to him in the a.m. So he sends me fat naked chicks, but that doesn't count because it wasn't real Outlook stationery. Anyone can stick a goatsx picture in an email. But only I dig through the depths of the internet to find real stationery that will blind you, make you cower in fear of the animated gifs or take you back to the good old days of the early 90's when everyone who made graphics seemed to have a Holly Hobbie fetish. Now, your job is to find me the most hideous Outlook stationery you can. Then I'll keep emailing Alan, asking him why he hasn't updated his blog in a long time. In fact, it's been since the Eagles LOST. Apparently, I'm in antagonistic mode today. Oh, don't worry. When Alan finally blocks me from the four email addresses I have for him, I will move on to someone else. Maybe you. The animated rat is my favorite so far. Update: And here I thought Laurence APPRECIATED the kitties I put in the stationery when I emailed him to tell him he was being a dick. But nooooo, he thought the kitties were ugly. So now you have to find ugly stationery for me to annoy Laurence with as well. Arafat stationery, anyone? Update: Thanks to my friend and evil person Carol, I just sent Laurence an email with scrolling Michael Jackson stationery. I think it had a midi, too. Alan has stopped responding to my mail.


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Ohhhh ... the depths of your cruelty. And while I haven't updated Avocare in a week, let's not ignore my noble efforts at Command Post ...

OH ... and for the record, I MADE an Outlook stationary out of the picture of that fat chick ... that was no simple jpg insert.

I look forward to what you'll find (and send).

There I was, minding my own business, when Michele not only slaps me with a Human F7 because I'm being a jackass on C-P, but she ALSO sends me kittens in the margin.

It's Sunday.
I'm stuck at work.
And I'm dealing with butt-ugly kittens.

Yes, my kitty-cats were cute as kittens. But there's so much nicer as cats now. And I do NOT use them for e-stainery.

Perhaps I need to rethink this as I plot my... REVENGE!


How funny ... "Revenge" is what I titled the Fat Chick Stationary.

Just as long as it isn't that goatcx.se crap.

I e-mailed you links to some so you can surprise people;) (Mwah-ha-ha.)

This is why I don't use Outlook, Outlook Express, or any other sucky Microsoft email product. Thunderbird rules, Outhouselook drools.

Always there to help in the evil doings!!!

I wish I'd known you were looking for gouge-out-your-eyeballs ugly Outlook stationary. I could've just FWDed some of the ones the ladies in my office use every day and saved you the trouble....

Incredimail is the way to annoy. There's thousands upon thousands of Incredimail stationary out there, you name it, it's out there. You can even find stationary upwards of 1mb per. Something to satisfy your evil desires although there might be some retaliation were you to use such.