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somebody keep on eye on the pope

First there were the Johns: John Ritter and Johnny Cash.

Now there are the P's: Palmer and Plimpton.

P stands for Pope. The Pope's name is John. See where I'm going with this?

Can we quickly change Arafat's name to John Price?


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Can we quickly change Arafat's name to John Price?

And change his age to 54...

Pardon me for pointing out that people have been predicting the Pope's passing ever since shortly after he was, er, popified. Sooner or later, we can be sure, he will indeed die. But don't hold your breath. He's been shot, he's been sick, and he has collapsed in public, but he's a tough old fart and he's not going to die until he's good and ready.

You are so obsessed with the obituary-prone citizenry of our fine nation. Why can’t you just leave them rest-in-peace? With all the movies, video games, and sports equipment abouts---this is what passes as your idea of entertainment. Sicko. Michele, make double sure that your membership in the local santeria club hasn’t expired yet, otherwise, the Beatles might have to write you a new song if Homeland Security L.L.C. checks you into a cryogenic funeral parlor. Next thing we know, you’ll be posting pictures of famous puppies and kittens and parrots, and undoubtedly, all will failed to escape your inquiry into the relevancy of numerology or alphabetology to their comatose induction. You could have won the state’s lottery by now, if, you hadn’t spent all your energy combing the media graveyards. Is grave-keeping your favorite hobby or your only pursuit in the macabre? Send me the $200.00 you owe me and return the Sagway you borrowed from me by this Friday and I’ll let you walk around without the aid of a mortician. By the way, do you have a preferred day-of-the-week to make your own exit? And would it better if you pull the plug at night after the local news or on a clear day? How about any tidy predictions for the next week? Are you aware that the ashes of the cremated are all mixed together and shaken and stirred by retarded pranksters who failed bakery school and could not deep-fry a decent zeppole, much less, roast a cadaver? For your next trick, tell us---junkies, perverts, and all your children---your take on the possibilities of reincarnation---be complete.

Well, RonHawaii sure came to the party wearing his patented schizophrenia scarf, didn't he? Ron, dude, lighten up. I can only conclude, due to the sheer rambling verbosity of your comment, that you were serious, although I'm a bit hazy what it is you were trying to be serious about. If you'll pardon me whilst I rake you with the rectal rod of reality, I must point out that people die and, when famous people die, their obituaries become NEWS, and news, by its very nature, inspires discussion between people who read the news. Oh, yeah, and occasionally, people make jokes about famous people who have passed on. It's part of human nature, and I suggest you invest in some before that colossal corn cob you have wedged in your ass makes you any more socially unbearable.

I've banned Ron before, mostly because his inane ramblings were taking up too much of my bandwidth and he never had a point.

Guess he found his way back.

Like some sort of mentally confused homing pigeon.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: there's just no reasoning with the insane.

(j)ackass (p)alestinian

but then I had one for Sharon, not appropriate for this site or this particular day.

irrefutable proof that RONHAWAII is MACHEYE

Rob, that was, quite possibly, the best laugh I've had all week.

The actor who played "Whitey" on "Leave it to Beaver" also just passed away. He was 54.

C’mon all.....let me have my say. A few boo’s would have been adequate. Even bashing would have been too severe. There’s no need to be acting like a high school mob from Pennsylvania. May I ask you, if, the passing of the famous is more important then the passing of a commoner? The answer, of course, is no. Should everyone remember Captain Ahab, and not remember Starbuck? Captain Ahab did take the Ishmael’s, in all of us, sailing around the world, but should Ahab be remembered any more than an individual of his crew? By posting “only” pictures of departed celebrities, and excluding your neighbor’s alabasters, in effect, you are creating a caste system for the deceased.

As far as people of note being newsworthy. Tribes from around the world have buried their high chiefs or kings in secret ceremonies so that unworthy eyes could not gaze upon their resting places. This was preformed to show the people’s reverence. However, the Egyptians used pyramids for the same occasions. Today, the burial chambers in these same pyramids have been found to be looted many centuries, ago. But the royal bones buried in secret caves, still lie undisturbed and retain their mana. Thus, the posting of pictures of the famous or the pasting of condolences on a blog, alas, only leaves the solemnity of the departees vulnerable to looters. May all rest in peace over the weekend.

P.S. Michele.....you did not boot me off your blog. But this was mainly due to my bottomless pit of genuflection, rather than any earthly harmony with Feng Shiu. On a particular Friday earlier this year, you posted “.....Jesus in a freaking canoe.....” To which I replied, “Michele.....you should not use the lord’s name in vain, notwithstanding, T.G.I.F.” One of your commenters (fucking bitch) flamed me with, “Always somebody to rain on the parade. Always gotta be someone pissing on the merriment... Ron, if Haysoose doesn't want his name bandied about he can file it with the fucking patent office just like everyone else.” Well, that night your server went down. To get to the point.....prophesy.

Ron, take your meds, STFU and STFD.

I was going to simply state that you didn't have to strecth with the "P" for Pope, because his name is John Paul. The first pope with two names, I believe. That's all I wanted to say, but then everything got all freaky-deaky around here.

For the record. When the Pope dies. I will be devasted. I will seriously need to take the day off work.

"The first pope with two names, I believe."

Um, no, he is John Paul II, after all.