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t33kid is l33t!

blasterkid.gifThis is Jeffrey Lee Parson, also known as teekid, also known as the guy who wrote the code for the Blaster virus. Here is a screenshot of Mr. t33kid's website, and another, from the Google cache. He is a l33t hax0r. Or was. On his former website (which now just shows an Apache marker), you could actually download viruses (virii?) so you, too could spread them around the internet and cause havoc and mayhem.

Oh what fun it must be to be a l33t hax0r! To sit in your basement all day, sweat staining your t-shirt, mom bringing you big glasses of Jolt soda, making jokes with your other hax0r friends. What a life!

I really want to smack this shitstain upside the head. I mean, look at him. Did this kid ever get out of the house? You can tell from a black and white photo that he has that pasty skin that people who never leave the house often have. Obviously, the only exercise this guy got was doing keyboard push-ups.

As my battle cry says: "I'm going to flog you until the laws of physics are violated!"

I really hate hackers. Though I think we are supposed to call morons like this crackers and not hackers. Whatever, I still want to kick his ass. Being that I can't do that, I could just ask you all to take your Photoshop skills to his picture and be mean about it.

UPDATE: Ok, since someone mentioned Jabba:

jabbahack.jpg

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Listed below are links to weblogs that reference t33kid is l33t!:

» Jabba the Hack from Sketches of Strain
The author of the Blaster Virus has been deservedly Photoshopped over at Michele's. Be sure to click on the extended entry!! D... [Read More]

» As the worm turns from dustbury.com
The Feds are coming down hard on Jeffrey Lee "teekid" Parson, who allegedly has admitted to rewriting the Blaster worm... [Read More]

» Jabba: One l33t Hacker from The American Mind
Jeffrey Lee Parson, the creator of one of the Blaster viruses, being the fat slob that he is will receive [Read More]

» Makeover/Reality Shows in Bitter Competition to Sign Blaster Virus Teen from On the Fritz - Observations of Modern Life
Queer Eye and Big Brother 5 lead bidding war to put teen hacker on the air. HOPKINS, Minn. — Less than 24 hours after being charged with unleashing a strain of the Blaster Internet worm that infected computers around the... [Read More]

Comments

I'll be surprised if anyone can make him look more repulsive.

This was just on my local paper's website. Kid lives in the next town over.

It seems all they could say about him was that he was 6'4" and 320 pounds, an "intimidating figure". And that's NOT from playing football, folks.

I'm about the same height, and he weighs almost twice as much as me. That, I cannot even imagine.

I'm not fat bashing, just saying that this kid's parents really needed to get him out of the house. Looks like he'll be leaving the house for sure now.

Apparantly, he started off as a GeoCities dork:

http://216.239.41.104/search?q=cache:bZdHazttWcgJ:www.geocities.com/t33kid/+%22t33kid%22&hl=en&ie=UTF-8

Amazing what years planted in front of the PC without sunlight will do to you.

sorta looks like a young Jabba the Hut.
Yes, I know. I'm hell-bound.

You mean you're going to hell for insulting Jabba the Hut?

D

Jeez. I'm a fat bastard myself, but I'm not that big. Looks like he had a lot of time to master those l33t skills of his by forgoing sports. Asshat.

We need to set an example to virii writers everywhere. Just kill the mofu.

A good spanking (real and court-initiated) and some quality time outside, maybe. But kill?

Psh. He's a script kiddie. He isn't the "real deal."

I say he stays in jail till he can do 20 push-ups.

Unfortunately, this little boil on the backside of the nation has caused something like tens or hundreds of millions of dollars of damage (if not billions), so a simple (or even complex) spanking is not really a suitable punishment. A nice, long, horsewhipping, followed by a few weeks in the stocks somewhere on Wall Street, followed by a 100% garnishment of his wages above, say $10k/year for life might begin to cover it.

But probably not.

what a dirty freakin bastard!!

Ok, since he's such a shit hot hacker, er... scripter, let's put him to work finding and draining the bank accounts of terrorist organizations. The first part of the $$ will go to repay those whom he hurt and the rest can go toward kicking the rest of the crap outta terrorists.

Now that's paying one's debt to society.

I took up the challenge, since nobody else seems to be doing it:

http://www.electrocentric.com/gfx/teekid.jpg

Er... as a hacker (not a script kiddie, btw, there's a difference) I gotta say a couple of things here: One, this kid is probably NOT the kid that wrote the Blaster virus, just someone that propagated it. Then again, I could be wrong, but probably he just used Visual Studio to modify the code of the LoveSan worm or some such. These guys are legion. Which brings me to TWO- I think the real villain here is Micro$oft. How much did you pay for an operating system that a fucking 18 year-old kid can bring to its KNEES? That's like buying a car that can't go over railroad tracks without breaking an axle.

More (semi-thoughtful) ranting on the subject of OSes here:
http://www.wasuvi.com/MT/archives/000140.html

Heh. His Yahoo profile is basically blank, though. (Last updated two years ago) Go figure.

What a friggin' loser.

Is that a Trek uniform I see on him?

Wonderful -we have a mordisly obese, heavy-metal f**, loser hacker Mitnick wannabee. I think he should be sent to FCC Joliet for about 15 y ears, and while there, be forced to eat only 800 calories a day, and do 500 sit-ups and 1000 pushups a day. he might then become manly, and gain "self-esteem" so that he no longer feels the need to destroy other peoples property, and interfere in other peoples lives, just because he now is a fat lump that gets no respect from anyone in school. Damned fatso!!!!!

I remember seeing an article on Yahoo the day before they got him saying an arrest was very probable in the next 24 hours.

I think, now I'm not sure about the details, but I think that the 24 hour head start wasn't enough.

I hear he had only made it halfway up the basement stairs before the cops came knocking.

Patrick got it right. Jabba didn't write Blaster. He just did a couple of minor mods to it, and released a different strain.

Goddamn little script-weenie. Welcome to the world of "consequences and repercussions". I hope they throw several books at him.

And of course, he WOULD be from Hopkins. Great. My surname associated with this jackass...

I'm more amazed that Wizayne is 6'4" and only about 170 lbs.

I saw himhauled off in handcuffs on the local news. he's 400 lbs at least. He's Harry Knowles level fat.

"I'm more amazed that Wizayne is 6'4" and only about 170 lbs."

Ted Williams was 6'3" and 146 lbs as a rookie in 1939--didn't seem to cause him much trouble.

Heck, I was 6'0" and 115 pounds as a sophomore in high school--rented myself out as a pipe cleaner for extra money. :-)

People are blaming this kid, and rightfully so, because he's a big loser who gives computer geeks a bad name and someone blamed Microsoft, and rightfully so, because you'd think they'd learn and they'd actually make something that didn't have as many flaws as it does, but what about those people who propogate the spread of these viruses because they have no clue how to take care of their PCs? These are the people who don't run an AV program or a firewall, or do, but they never update them. These are the people who never get the update patches for Windows. These are the people who think it's okay to open attachments no matter where they come from. (They also probably think it's okay to download something like Bonzi Buddy, too, but that's another rant for a different topic). These are the people who don't run virus scans on a regular basis, either. They're just as much to blame as Jabba here and Microsoft.

What Kathy said.

What is so hard about keeping your computer patched with security downloads from Microsoft, or keeping your virus scanner updated? Really people. Take responsibility for your own data folks!

Perhaps this is a good time to ask where is my last back-up?

OR...

When did I do my last back-up?

Or even...

How do I do a back up?

Yes this guy is a massive dweeb. But I would rather face many minor threats that we learn from than one massive threat that REALLY does shut your ass down.

well....do I detect a bit of jealousy? Yes the kid is fat...yes the kid has never been outside....he also has more IQ than most people on here....when was last time you lot wrote a virus? or even a program? And don't be fooled....he will be out in 2 months working as a security consultant !!!

He did NOT write the virus...

He added a "trojan horse" to it.

The code is easily accessible and is posted on the internet.

I understand the criticism that people should be maintaining be more conscientious about running the once-a-week security updates and patches from their anti-virus software vendor, but I think that they are off-base. Here's why- I don't run any anti-virus software. None. No firewall either. Seriously. I don't even update my system because I use such an old computer that new OS updates make my DVD player act all funny.

Read that again:
I don't do any of that stuff.

And my computer runs fine. It's a three year old Mac Powerbook running OS X, rev. 10.2.1

Why doesn't windows work this well? Because no one forces them to.

Should every computer user be a sys admin? Hell, no. Do you recalibrate your own brakes? Change you own oil? How about adjusting the alignment on your front end? Cut our your own appendix? Fix your own watch? Pushing this responsibility off on the end user is a cop-out. Microsoft can do better- they don't because no one makes them.

Why are you people insulting t33? He could kill all your comps, lol.

You guys should be more careful.

if he was really that leet, then why did he get caught ?

And I asked Dr. Weevil a couple years ago about "virii", grumbling (as is my wont) that it was some sort of bastardized nonce word. He confirmed that it's certainly not a proper Latinate plural.

Patrick brags that his completely unprotected Mac doesn't get viruses, worms or trojans...

Heh. If MacOS had high enough profile to attract attention, believe me there'd be some malicious code written for it. It's just that no one much uses it, so no one cares.

Microsoft is no angel, and they write crufty code that's vulnerable as hell -- but deluding yourself that Apple writes bulletproof code is nothing short of idiocy.

t33kid is not a hacker... he'is just a pork thinking a little bit more than a lot of people here...

Look at the stats, s7r0k3 (that looks like a nice script-kiddie name, btw). Various OSes were studied and and compared over a 5 year period for security features/flaws. MacOS consistently had the lowest number of security flaws. I believe the numbers were 2/1/0/5/0, or some variation thereof. Various Linux distros were in double digits. Windows? Triple digits, five years straight. And rising.

Poor, poor PC lemmings...

But come on, who would want to use a mac? thers fuck all decent software out for them! i mean, in my old school, they had macs, running on a friggin windows 2000 server!

What a loser. And, no, he doesn't have higher IQ than anyone on this list. Otherwise he'd realise that he was wasting his time while writing viruses.

The trail he left was so obvious that he's either a complete idiot, or he wanted to get caught.. He's nothing special.

It doesn't take someone with the resources of the FBI to track this guy down, anyone could have.

The fat bastard should have got out more. He's not a hacker. He doesn't have a higher IQ. He's just a script-kiddie lamer.

Hey lets be honest. This guy is a total wanna-be with no talent. His "life time works" can be viewed here: http://melonballs.com/ so as to judge for yourself.

Anyway the best repellent to a script-kiddie is routine mind numbing network maintenance.

Someone send his defense counsel a classic "I'm With Stupid" T-shirt, I think they'll need it.

I doubt the severeness of the harm he did. His version was, how shall I say, a bit too overt. 'His' virus connected to his personal domain for example. An action most firewalls would ask permission for, resulting in detection of the worm.

The number of PCs I read his version infected was 7000. What's the damage per PC?

In my opinion it is like a cry for attention. A bit sad.

Some spanking will do the trick. Give him a life.

This piece of defecation should be placed in general population and allowed to become Bubba's personal possession, if you get my drift. He reminds me of the kid who was always being called names and finally realized how to get back at the world. No doubt in my mind that he's extremely smart and possesses a high IQ, but he directed his talents in a negative fashion. Good part about any time he receives in Federal Prison, is that he must serve the entire time, with NO chance for parole. With the trouble he's caused, he should serve life in prison, sleeping with Bubba each and every night. I wonder if he can squeal like a pig? Only a thought.

My job here is done.

If you want to nail this kid to a cross for having something to do with the code of this virus, go for it. And if you want to nail M$ up there too cus the have sold this OS with security comparable to a twist-tie, I'm with you. But after that call all your friends cus we'll have to cut down a forest to crucify all the morons who made this little piece of code into a million dollar pile of bullshit. But we'll let most of you pick out your own tree.

Young fat idiot, without girlfriend and sex. He should be send to a hospital for mentaly seak people.

For every computer he infected he should get it in the butt in jail.

6'4" and 170? Someone put-up a jar jar binks picture!

I don't see why some people think he wrote the worm, he just changed it a little like most scriptkiddies like to do...

He is the coolest kid ever!!! lol just playing. But hey cut this kid some slack man he didn't write the worm. And he prolly couldn't hack anything if he tried. He prolly has never kissed a girl. And now hes gonna get pounded in the ass so lets feel a little sorry for him. I mean he didn't write the original. Since our government always likes to get someone arrested. So we think something is getting down when in reality its not. He is just a "script kiddy" that i guess got caught. So we need to look at the bigger picture and try to find the real source of where the worm came from :::Smells something::: Al Qaeda!!!! lol I wouldn't doubt it. Yet again though our government is using a 400 lb 18 year old kid as a example. Well I am sorry man but u did do a crime so u got to do some time. By the way if u do get out Decline a interview with Barbra Walters!!!! just some advice. I am out pz

I do agree that what t33kid did was wrong and it is against the things that I am about. However I think that sitting in a message board, flaming anything that spikes the air, is more Uber 114m4 then what he did. Besides, he never referred to himself as a '31337 h4X0r' so I do not understand why each one of you has to mention that. (I think you are all familiar with 'leet speak' since most of you like to use it so frequently in your rants.) I think that it is because you are incapable of continuing a conversation without bringing back stale references to old quotes. On the account you can not think of any on your own, as well as being so brain washed by the media that you will even believe that the shit that spells out in your alphabet soup is scientific fact. Anyways, I would like to know what his appearance has to do with anything. What, because the media had talked so much about how he looked, that is for some reason important? So if you must... Only make fun of the stupidity that put him in this situation, and not for how he looks. For if that is the fact, you mine as well start making fun of blacks, Asians, Mexicans, and every other race. If you want to know the truth... I was laughing my ass off when I heard about another windows worm! Only a few days before I was thinking to myself, "hmm... I think we're long overdue for another virii." Maybe, this is just a sign. Telling you to get a real OS! Don't fear virii... ph33r the PENGUIN

YOU FUCKING IDIOTS! I'm not even gonna waste my time reading all the bull shit you guys wrote about this dude...sure its not smart to spred malicious viruses, BUT TrackBack your a fucking idiot. How about researching your facts before insulting someone "This is Jeffrey Lee Parson, also known as teekid, also known as the guy who wrote the code for the Blaster virus." Jeffery Parson DID NOT WRITE THE BLASTER VIRUS! he simply made a variant of it, the variant was that it recorded it on his site, he is responsible for 0.014% of the infections (at least that is what i have gathered, no one is perfect)...not to say it is ok to write variants, or that it is ok to make something that only affects a small number, BUT DONT JUDGE SOMEONE WITH OUT THE FACTS!

OH YEA, and whats with all the fucking steryotypical comments, who gives a shit how fucking fat or pale he is, I'm pale as fucking hell, and i like HEAVY-METAL mr. BUD....but i do get out, so suck a dick. Now wht i find very funny is there are 2 predominate steryotypes about geeks, either skinny or fat.....now i duno if its just me, but that kinda means that no matter WHAT you look like, that u can look like a steryotypical hacker...or maybe im the only one who realizes that. and the heavy-metal BS Bud said, there are these 2 steryotypes, either hackers are punks, or neerdy/smart looking nontrendy and shit....so basicly....hackers just cant be trendy? is that it? please enlighten me

as always we will favor our gifts to thrust the racial slurs to those idiots that try to mess with our networks. It's funny how we will nearly make this asshole a celeb, yet one that will pay for everything, every minute, every fucking dollar I lost while my shit shut down every flippin 2 mins. So I dedicate this page to JP & all those sorry fuckers that wanna hack!
http://www.redworminc.com/teekid

Like him...I'll find you too!

jabba sux maybe hell hack from prison now you know they give those bitches everything in there

But come on, who would want to use a mac? thers fuck all decent software out for them! i mean, in my old school, they had macs, running on a friggin windows 2000 server!

You don't make no kinda sense. Shoot...

How quick we are condem that which we do not understand.

This kid had a fair amount of ability nothing to far from center. He didn't write the original Blaster worm and yet he will be persecuted as if he had. This is a message to y'all test your stuff on private networks and then unleash it via a kinkos kiosk or coffe house box or something. This dude just got lazy and set it off from his own house with pointers back to a domain that he owned, Duh.. this dude aint 1337 he's a d0rk that aint learnt tha way.

haha some of you say that this kid is smart and hes an uber hacker...riiight.

if he was uber he wouldnt have had the worm forward sh1t to his own web site hahaha

all the fbi/cia task force had to do was follow the trail of half eaten pizza and empty Krispy Kreme boxes to his basement and find him copy-pasting code

You are all morons, especially the one who wrote the article.

You spend your time dissing him when you have no obvious right too. You are even worse than him.

I think that the news has portrayed him worse than he actually is. How many times have you done something stupid and dangerous? No matter what group you are in, you do something stupid.

Some people DUI, some people shit their pants at school, etc.

Dont diss someone when you dont have the right to.

If you knew as much as hit did about computers, you could easily be rich.

I do, however, agree that he fucked up bad. But it doesn't mean that you morons have to flame him for something totally off topic. He fucked up, wow.

Amber, who can afford a MAC? TAKE A HINT AND PH33R DA PENGUIN!

Oh and RedWormINC, or WETF If you ran a real server you wouldn't have received the worm! Hell I run a better OS on my PDA! BTW I'm truly sorry that your IQ is that of the CPU speed on a Commodore 64, and M$ Winblowz is the only OS you can handle. CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, who needs a keyboard! Quite frankly I think you got what was deserved, for running such an inferior OS! Oh yeah, and for your whining I could give two shits! Count 'em two.

LINUX, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO TOMMOROW?

oh my god. time out no need to just bang each others heads in. djeezes. ok. i'm outta here, can't stand your bullshit any more.

well he is actually smart so he must put in pentagon special department. work for nation.

I'd feel very sorry for the security firm that hires this dork as a consultant. They'd basically be hiring someone to hang out in irc all day. This fool is such a joke and getting way more attention than he deserves.

They should get him a couch next to the snack & drink machines, and watch him magically grow.

actually he didn't write the source code for the blaster worm, he debugged the code of the blaster worm to create a new variant of it...(already mentioned before i'm sure).

but i reckon it's unfair for you to act like a bitch just cos you don't have the knowledge to secure your system from simple weaknesses.

i mean, yeah, act all king of the hill on your little website here - delve more fully into the world of the 'net instead of your little self indulgent corner and you might not seem such a tit.

and i hate to point out the obvious (actually i don't you're a fool) but a virus writer isn't a hacker. or a cracker. they're a erm, virus writer/programmer.

dumbass.

incidentally, the originally blaster virus infected around 1 pc per second in the first 24 hours but i don't hear y'all crying about that.

perhaps cos you don't have a picture of a fat kid to take the piss out of...the real virus author raped your sad asses and i think its hilarious :)

anyone who writes a virus is sad, and it's obvious these guys r nerds with no lives

Dear PPL,

Look at the photos OF THE SITE and you'll see that someone nicknamed b0b is resposable as well.
The .VB extension file was edited as a 2 person team if u can see.t33kid is in trouble, but whatabout this so called 'b0b'?

Sorry i won't be here so your going to have email me for replays.

sincerly,

Nathan.f

It is sad... that you are incapable of writing a virus, but nor can t33kid. Also I am more of a geek then a nerd. Oh and so not to confuse the facts with your stereotypes, we do have lives and not only ones that revolve around computers. Take me for example, I like to spend time with my gurl, and she just happens to be a nympho! Which is a hell of a lot more fun then you have when you're slapin your nutz against you're ..... um.... idunno

Microsoft - Where do you want to go today?
Linux - Where do you want to go tomorrow?

FreeBSD - Are you guys coming or what?

Seriously,

redworminc how can you talk smack about anybody? Working in the tech field I have heard alot of posers in my time and you definatly remind me of them.

By the way folks if anybody wants a good laugh go to this morons website and look around. His pic gallery is the best. Nothing like something he calls erotic art which includes his cock in a penis pump. LMFA!!!

www.redworminc.com

http://redworminc.com/fun/jun3_redworm_dscf0006.jpg

Any here is a pic of the winner. Man, you just can't make this stuff up.

http://redworminc.com/fun/logo_david.gif

Heh, as long as we are stereotyping... Redworminc and his friends look like a bunch of hicks to me! I mean the car shows, the baseball hats that they live in. Oh and don't forget the haircuts/all-round nature of the photos! (where did this guy learn to type? maybe he bought a monkey... or became the father of one!)

http://www.whois.net/whois.cgi2?d=t33kid.com To register in his own name and address, he obviously has no real skills. Hard to believe there are still individuals stupid enough to use microsoft's operating system on their own free will. Whenever I use it, it's because I'm forced to.

The kid was misguided. Maybe you should have a look at yourselves and work out what you did wrong with my generation. You were the generation that fucked us. So take the fucken blame. We are only doing what you told us to do. We haven't had our chance yet to be indivuals. So you sad fucks who are complaining about this poor misunderstood kid think again. It is your generations fault. Actually it is all your fault,this problem was released ages ago. If you were still using Windows then it is your own stupid fucken fault. Get linux. IT IS FREE! and is alot better then WINDOWS. Oh yeah do some research into Windows security holes. I am still using windows and but i dont complain about hackers cos it is my fault for using a shitty os full of holes.

So leave the kid alone and start working on a better future then critising a kid with an awesome ability. I wish I was as talented as him.

skript kiddi modifing viruses
heh
serves him right
fat ass sitting in the basement wacking off to ascii porn

This guy is such a moron and a fatass it is unbelievable!!! If you are going to mess with a virus you really shouldn't put anything in it that could lead anyone back to you. This guy made a huge mistake in modifying this virus!!!

This guy is such a moron and a fatass it is unbelievable!!! If you are going to mess with a virus you really shouldn't put anything in it that could lead anyone back to you. This guy made a huge mistake in modifying this virus!!!

nice site, keep the work up

Morality by consensus is frequently morality by convenience.

I think you guys are stupid.
I reckon he probably is 1337 not a uber hacker but 1337,im not saying hes 1337 for writing a VARIANT of the blaster worm,but think about it,hes most probably a social outcast all he does is hack,which he has probably been doing since he was 14,so of course hes 1337.
What i dont get is why he didnt launch an attack against microsoft,overtime it would of been more than 7000 computers infected and might of been enough to shutdown or at least slow down microsofts server.
But i seriously dont know why he put a link to his website in the worm code,also the person that wrote the original blaster could be a skiddie,all they need was basic knowledge of C++ well he probably is a skiddie because the original blaster worm had a major coding error thats why it didnt work.
RPC DCOM 2 exploit is now publically available why isnt there a msblaster2.exe ?
All you have to do,to make another blaster is get the blaster.b code no blaster.a because thats fucked up,then replace the exploit code with the new version.
I really feel sorry for the kid,hes gonna get it in jail up the ass from a 300 pound man named bubba.

Dale is a fucking faggot!

Let's go step by step on these postings.....

>>Biohertz...Oh and RedWormINC, or WETF If you ran a real server you wouldn't have received the worm!...<< even people with same OS "some were not hit with it, who really cares, not like it made me go out & buy a stealth server. Don't be ashammed of knowledge & to learn from it.

>>Biohertz...redworminc how can you talk smack about anybody? Working in the tech field I have heard alot of posers in my time and you definatly remind me of them....<< Poser? That's a good one, Your an AOL Tech rep by any chance? Sounds like it, anyways thanks for the spam/refreshing on my post. I/We the internet lurkers/chasers/flamers have all the rights by internet law to talk as much shit about anything we wish to online as it appears. You on the other hand by the respects of your GREAT reply, bleh...Not even knowing wtf you even talking about/ looking at my dick for one, for two that was a vaccum cleaner & not a penis pump, for 3 I did it all for people like you "Insecure self-centered Johnson Babbies. Btw, Baby Oil works better, If ya know what I mean Biohertz, your such a stub muffin!

what the fuck is all your problems you pick on the kid because he's fat. that really says alot about all of you, it's pretty sad really. you all dont even know this kid, he was smart now hes going to rot in prison for a while, for a dumbass thing he shouldnt have done. you all get mixed up on what he actually did because you all beleive the media, he only actually caused about 4,000$ in damage total, i looked into it.

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