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while i wait for my husband to mess with his hair...

[Jeez. He's such a woman sometimes.]

Ben Weasel notes in the comments here that Bill Maher was making a joke about SUVs and dead babies. Jeff Jarvis noted the same. Now, I think I have a pretty good sense of humor and I'm quite adept at recognizing jokes when they appear, but that one just went wooosh! right over my head. Perhaps because I am so used to viewing Maher as an uglier version of Ted Rall, I failed to see the humor. Oh, wait. I know why I didn't see it. Because it wasn't the least bit funny!

Ben then goes on to ask:

What does it mean to be a "card-carrying member" of the Left? Where do you get the cards and who hands them out? What do you have to do to get one? Is "card carrying member" the highest honor? Why carry the card? Does it get you seated fast at the best restaurants? Do you get discounts on oil changes? Do those who carry the cards look down on those who leave them in a drawer at home? Do they need to be renewed? Is there a charge?

That really should have read Far Left for, as far as I know, the straight old regular left has no cohesive organization under which they rest, unlike, say the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy. I believe the cards are handed out by Susan Sarandon and, no, that is not the hightest honor. The highest honor belongs to those called Chomskyites, who get hemp plaques to hang in their bedroom.

If you flash the card at a restaurant, you get half price on all vegan meals. That whole parking thing is not required, as card-carrying members do not use gas-consumption vehicles. However, if you show up on a Segway or in an electric car, the first appetizer is free. And that oil change question is just silly. Members of the far-left do not consume oil! Ever! For anything!

If you get a card it would be best to carry it with you at all times so you don't get your ass knocked down by someone charging a Starbucks window with a brick. Just flash your card and he'll step out of your way. The cards are free (provided you join ANSWER first), they are emblazoned with a photo of Che and a Free Mumia! sticker and are good for life unless, like me, you decide to burn yours at some point in which case, make sure to use lots of oil.

Hope I helped!

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Comments

That was random

Michele,
You forgot to mention that the cards are not made of plastic or paper, no leftie would ever carry anything made from oil or be the cause of another tree being felled, but made of naturally grown and not genetically modified soy. The really great part about them is that they can be secretly eaten when on hunger strikes or, for older members, can also be consumed for the onset of any vomit-in.

Maher doesn't always veer to the left, and occasionally he even makes sense. Basically, he's convinced of his own brilliance. Sort of a left-hand version of Bill O'Reilly.

A few weeks ago I did hear Maher making fun of the liberal notion of trying to "understand" those who want to kill us - e.g. a good portion of the Arab world. Anyone who watched his old TV show will probably remember that he's ultra-liberal on some issues like gun control, but libertarian/conservative on certain others.

Reminds me of an old Harlan Ellison joke:

"If there is such a huge Jewish world-wide banking conspiracy, then I want some words with these guys. Because some asshole is getting my monthly check!"

Am I the only one who immediately had these lyrics and melody pop into their head?

http://www.lyricstime.com/lyrics/43045.html

"if you show up on a Segway or in an electric car, the first appetizer is free"

But what if you are pulling your own generator?

This is a bit off-topic, but you've triggered a memory of reading "Even The Queen", a short story by Connie Willis. It was written in response accusations of Connie not having enough feminist elements in her stories.

Well worth reading, especially if you like seeing the Vegan/Radical Feminist/Treehugger/Left mocked.

I've got a card for the Servants of Cthulhu: Department of Unspeakable Terror. Anyone know of any good restraunts where it will give me preferential treatment?

and that went Whoosh, but then I don't find much humor in the whole left-right bickerfest fingerpoint polarity, other than that it is exceedingly silly.
Citizen Vs. Citizen, calling each other names-we are a nation of kindergartners playing political dodgeball, a bully's favorite sport.

The "card-carrying member" thing refers to membership in the ACLU.

If I'm not misremembering, Walter Mondale was a card-carrying member of the ACLU, and Bush I made some major hay with that.

If I'm misremembering, it was someone else running for President.

Bsti: Was there some point to that, other than to imply that noticing that various groups of people believe various stupid things is "bullying"?

All I ask is that people make some semblance of sense...

(On another note, I'm a "card-carrying" member of any number of things. Mainly because carrying the card gets me a discount at somethign or other, or has a membership number on it. Like, say, my AAA card.)

If I'm misremembering, it was someone else running for President.

Mike Dukakis.

The phrase really started with Joe McCarthy, who shouted about "card-carrying members of the Communist Party".

I once met a card-carrying member of the American Bridge Association. He thought he could trump me, so I ruffed him up.

Maybe it's like one of those grocery store discount cards, where they track your actions to market to you. You know, get it scanned at the "Globalization NO!" rally, and you'll get flyers in the mail from Earth First, or something.

Then again, like the Subway card which, after being punched ten times gets you a free 12-incher (Don't even say it), maybe it's the number of events you attend that get you some free consideration. For instance, attend ten "Bush knew!" events and get a free t-shirt reading "Someone elected Gray Davis, and all I got was a $38 billion deficit."

"Bsti: Was there some point to that, other than to imply that noticing that various groups of people believe various stupid things is bullying?"

Naw, not really. Both sides do it, I prefer to stay out of it, and am frankly very tired of it.
Childish, IMO.
It's all Hannity/Coulter-Speak to me and both sides are guilty of it in one form or other.
I tend to read conblogs and ignore demblogs so I see more of it on the con side.
Don't really care, I just think it's silly.
But I am not the sharpest knife in the drawer anyway.

About Bill Maher.

He launched his career, as many comics do, with one really funny joke. It went like this:

I was raised by a Jewish father and a Catholic mother. Confession was interesting. "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. . .and I assume you know my attorney, Mr. Rosen."

Problem is, he hasn't been funny since.

So Maher's dumb joke went whooshing over your head because it wasn't funny? I found it unfunny, and I still got his pisher of a point. I mean, I could see missing the joke and puzzling over it and saying "Man, I just don't get this", but you (and many readers) instantly concluded that it was a Lefty, Republican-bashing, anti-capitalist, pro-vegan dig at SUV owners. This led you to then go on for paragraphs about something he didn't come close to saying, which then became Maher's fault for not being funny.

It's more likely that you saw the words "SUV owner" under Maher's name and leapt into a instinctive defensive crouch. It made for a good round of "Dogpile on the Moonbat", but not much for insightful commentary.

So it's Maher not being funny enough that made his joke go whooshing over your head. I see.

I'm gonna kinda go out on a limb here and guess that you saw the words "SUV owner" under Maher's byline and went into a defensive Moonbat-bashing mode, ripping him to shreds for saying things he didn't say. That seems a little more likely to me than the "not funny" excuse, unless you're admitting that Lefties now have the power to cloud your mind!

Sorry! Somehow I posted two darfts of one post. I think MY mind is in the clouds.

Jasond, go back and reread the "joke".

I have read a book... "Status civilization" by Robert Sheckley... I think everybody MUST read it. Problems of this blog are discussed there very attentievly!!!