Nancy Pelosi: The Martha Stewart of Politics
Nancy knows how to throw a party. And now, all the Democrat house members can partake of Nancy's homey advice, thanks to her August recess memo.
“Order your cake! Order a sheet cake with ‘Happy Birthday Medicare’ written on it.”
Yes, Medicare. Nancy wants her people to celebrate the 38th birthday of Medicare. Armed with party goods and pens and papers, they should take their parties on the road where constituents can take part in the birthday party craft time by writing letters to the editor.
Buy additional party supplies. Be creative. Buy a ‘Happy Birthday’ tablecloth for the center table. Purchase disposable plates and utensils if the facility will not provide them. You may also wish to purchase additional party favors — horns and whistles can be very useful to ‘boo’ the Republican agenda,” suggests the document.
Synchronized Booing! My favorite party game! I bet old the townsfolk will just wet thier pants with excitement when they not only get to sing Happy Birthday, Medicare (Go Medicare, It's Your Birthday!) but blow on some horns as well.
I had no idea that treating voters like little children and using them to further your agendas was such a popular party pasttime.
“Set up tables. Spread a ‘Happy Birthday’ tablecloth on the center table, where cake will be placed. All other tables should have pens/pencils, writing paper, and copies of the sample letter to the editor.”
No Pin the Tail on the Donkey at this party. We're going to play Send a Letter to an Editor. Pelosi probably is cheap on the prizes. I bet you don't get a prize unless your letter gets printed.
“Know where the restrooms and telephones are located.”
That's an emergency instruction, in you case you need to hide out or call for help when the locals you invited to a party realize there's a catch.
"The Medicare issue is one of four that Pelosi’s leadership team is encouraging lawmakers to discuss over the long August recess. Others are the economy, education, and protecting national parks."
Ok, so they've got Medicare covered. Now what about the economy?
“Host a press conference in front of a highway construction site — great visual!”
Yea, and then we can all take pictures of us with the guys in the orange vests who are reading the paper and eating sandwiches while the lanes all around them are closed for miles in every direction. And with any luck, a huge crane will fall on one of Pelosi's lackeys. What a photo op that would be!
Hey, maybe for the educuation portion of the Summer of Pelosi tour, they can have mimes come and act out stories that have been obliterated from textbooks in the name of political correctness!
Gotta go, the cake's just about ready for decorating.
Comments
I suppose they could serve the construction workers some cake- now that's the kind of leadership this country needs in Washington!
Posted by: Sgt Hook | August 6, 2003 05:27 PM
But Michele, it was only ONE page out of 78.
Give her a break, it's not like it was 16 words.........
:)
Posted by: SondraK | August 6, 2003 05:28 PM
There is a Marie Antoinette joke lurking here somewhere. Let them eat cake and ice cream.
Hey, I look like a mime.
D
Posted by: David Strain | August 6, 2003 06:27 PM
Does anyone else have the feeling that Harold Ford Jr. spends a lot of his time pointing and laughing at his fellow Democrats for choosing that dimwit over him in the leadership election? I have a feeling that after the 2004 election, a majority of the remaining House Democrats are going to come to Ford and grovel to get him to rescue them from the horror that has been the reign of Ms. Pelosi. As someone on the other side of the fence, I should find this unfortunate, but I don't--I've seen Ford speak, and he is capable of expressing an opposing point of view without foaming at the mouth or otherwise acting like an idiot. It would be nice to have the foremost figure of the oppposing party be someone to respect and be wary of rather than to hold in contempt.
Posted by: M. Scott Eiland | August 6, 2003 08:31 PM
I can see it now: ten of the oldest living Medicare recipients playing "Duck, Duck..Goose"
Posted by: Frank DiSalle | August 7, 2003 08:50 AM
I agree dissing on Harold Ford was a terrible mistake for the Dems. Hard to feel sorry for them, though. Between Pelosi and Landrieu, they've had some colossal screwups.
Posted by: Scipio | August 7, 2003 11:20 AM
"I had no idea that treating voters like little children and using them to further your agendas was such a popular party pasttime."
Of course you did. We all knew. It's shocking to see it in full technicolor streamers and balloons.
Posted by: aaron | August 7, 2003 01:04 PM
Today's liberals have long reminded me of elementary school teachers of a particularly patronizing and unpleasant type..so this is really no surprise to me..
Posted by: David Foster | August 7, 2003 01:27 PM
I shudder to think what this woman would do were she in charge of the country. I can't even try to crack a joke about it because it is so horrifying. She epitomizes the Nanny State.
Posted by: md | August 7, 2003 01:31 PM