oh, those wacky animal activists!
What happens when a crazed animal rights activist owns a mall?
First, there's the problem of the ants. Alegra's Bridal & Invitations has a problem with the creatures. Basically, they are crawling all over the place. But Jeanne Daniels, owner of the mall, won't let Nancy, owner of the ant-infested store, get an exterminator to rid her of the insects. No, Jeanne wants the ants relocated. That's right. Relocated, as in moved.
Unless there's a Pied Piper for Ants in the Yellow Pages, I'm at a loss to figure out how Jeanne expects this to happen. Maybe play The Ants Come Marching on the mall speakers and see if they come out stepping in time to the beat? And then Jeanne and her vegan friends can find a nice sandhill for them to live in.
Now, don't go and think the ants were making their home in the mall so they could eat all the meaty scraps from the food court.
At least three businesses — two restaurants and a grocery/deli — have left the mall over the past few years because they were selling meat and Daniels wouldn't allow it.
And Nancy isn't allowed to sell anything made of leather in her bridal shop.
While Jeanne may be up on all the latest PETA trends, she doesn't seem to be too savvy in the business department. I've a feeling this mall won't be around much longer if she keeps driving store owners away. Lesson here: Business and activism do not mix.
If I were Nancy (who is relocating), I would wait until my last day at that mall, invite old Jeanne down to my store for a nice farewell lunch, and then re-create some scenes from Stomp! while the ants crawled around the floor. I'd be wearing leather. And eating a burger. Rare.