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soysage man to the rescue!

The sausage story just won't die. And everyone knew it would be just a matter of time before PETA became involved.

They once before wrote a letter to the Brewers requesting that a vegan "soysage" be added to the sausage race.

"Violence is violence, whether it’s toward ‘sausages’ or living animals," says PETA’s Sports Campaign coordinator, Dan Shannon. "Putting a veggie dog in the Sausage Race would help stop the violence and make animals ‘safe’ in the baseball world."

That was then. This is now. Now they have penned another letter to the Brewers, regarding the Saugage Beating Incident.

By rejecting the castration, dehorning, debeaking, wing-breaking, and throat-slitting that are part and parcel of the meat industry, you can send a powerful message that violence will not be tolerated in baseball—on the field or in the slaughterhouse.

Perhaps Randall Simon was simply expressing his frustration at the fact that the vegetarian hot dog was not allowed to compete. By allowing the peaceful "soysage" in the race, you could possibly avoid future player-meat confrontations.

I kid you not. This is real. Go look.

Nevermind the connotations of a player-meat confrontation. Don't even want to go there.

I say this whole idea is an affront to Soybeans everywhere, anyhow.

Honestly, I have no idea what to do with these people anymore. I have run out of snarky comments and sarcastic quips for PETA. They are just out of their fucking minds.

I wish I had seen this sooner, then I would have known that PETA was staging a protest not too far from my home today. I would have picked up a couple of hunks of salami and drove down there, where I would have my kids throw the salami out of the car window and at the protesters, screaming IF MEAT IS MURDER THAN MURDER SURE TASTES GOOD WITH MUSTARD!

Or maybe I just would have given them the finger and silently wished I was braver.

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Comments

I always wanted to roll around in fur in front of them PETA hooligans, and not because I endorse cruelty to animals. I am just against poorly communicate politics.

Randall Simon doesn't exactly strike me as a frustrated vegetarian.

How do these twits expect us to tailgate up here with the heady aroma of veggie dogs and tofu burgers?

This may have made my night complete...

Like to add... peta, that Ulice Payne is the President of the team. So go right ahead, send your letters to Wendy. I'm sure she'll get them.

Steve, you're too fast for me.

Does PETA support Simon's violent act to promote nonviolent veggie sausage? What's violent or nonviolent about food anyway? And does PETA believe in the ends justifying the means?

PETA is simply run by a bunch of nuts. There probably are some instances of corporate mistreatment of animals, but PETA's bizarre and ludicrous antics actually discourage the bulk of the population from taking AYTHING they say seriously.

Yay for "snarky comments"!

Hitting PETA people with a baseball bat is not violence, it's education. Just in case, you know, should the...ah...situation ever come up.

BTW, I actually did that one time...made a venison steak sandwich and went to sit right down in the middle of an anti-meat protest.

Well, not really, it was regular lunchmeat but I told some of the freaks it was venison (for future reference - you think they freak out about cows and pigs? Lambs, deer and bunnies really set them off.)

And since it's a lazy Sunday morning and I haven't had nearly enough coffee yet, I will throw out these other observations without attribution because I'm too lazy to look them up:

If you think the meat industry is cruel, you should see how they treat those poor soys.

If it's immoral to wear dead minks and dead cows, how come it's okay to wear dead naugas?

Vegetarians don't live longer, they just look that way.

If God didn't intend for us to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat?

Yeah, there's an awful lot of that "debeaking" and "wing-breaking" that goes into the sausage-making process.

One more for Ken:

Are you a vegetarian because you love animals, or because you hate plants?

Next time you hear of a PETA protest go to a meat market or the meat section of a grocery store and ask them if they have any meat that's gone bad they're trying to get rid of. They'll usually give it to you and you can make the meat throwing at PETA even better.

Down here PETA tried to dress up nicely and quote scripture and say Jesus was a vegeterian. They stood right outside of a Steak and Rib place during lunch hour. They got nothing but ridicule.

Here's a couple more for Ken:
I don't eat vegetables, vegetables are what food eats.
No Thumbs, No Mercy!

Gee, I always thought PETA stood for "People Eating Tasty Animals!"
My bad.

Those PETA folks are seriously messed up. And what do they have against Wisconsin? First they're trying to get us to get rid of milk as our official beverage, now they want a soysage in the sausage race? I don't think so!

yknow, i'm always smirkily surprised when a vegan tells me they like tool, especially considering that bit about the screaming carrots by Brother Maynard.

This Is Necessary.

amazing how much intolerance and hatred there is for vegetarians, where they're the ones saving the planet for all you fat asses. fuck off.