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the octodog: how did I ever live without it?

I swear, I do not make this stuff up. This one, I just stole from Ron.

May I introduce to you, the Octodog.

What, may you ask, is the Octodog? Well, I'll tell you.

The Octodog is a device that slices a hot dog up so it comes out looking like a....go ahead, guess....an octupus! Get it..octodog?

it's porn - it's a sexual aid - it's octodog!The hotdog is among the top ten items found in many lists concerning choking occurrences in young children. Pediatricians recommend slicing a hotdog linearly. The method of slicing a hotdog linearly can reduce the chances of choking during consumption. A sliced hotdog is a safer way to serve hotdogs to children. Octodogs are not only fun, but may be a safer way to serve hotdogs. Use Octodog’s Frankfurter converter and create Octodogs to add fun to any blah blah blah.

So folks, remember this: It's not a dildo. It's not a vibrator. It's not a really kinky way of acting on your animated hot dog character fantasies.

It's just a marketing tool to make parents feel guilty about using a regular old knife and fork to cut up their hot dogs.

Bad mom! What do you mean your children aren't using the Octodog? You cut your hot dogs into tiny pieces like that instead of in a linear fashion? I'm calling social services!

Seriously, if you buy one of these things I am going to come to your house and smack you upside your head.

I bet you own a bread de-cruster, too.


Now hold on there. My 19 month old nephew's two favorite things are hot dogs and octopusses. Link emailed to SIL. ;)

Get rid of the hot dog slicing feature, and mold it out of solid silicon with a vibrating electric motor inside, and you'd have a big seller.

In one issue of 'The Tick', Arthur the Moth Made The Tick Octodogs for dinner.

but wouldn't it be fun to play with it? i mean like see what else you could cut with it or is it all just plastic safety stuff?
alright, alright, i'm going back to bed now.

just tell me this isn't how you were planning to kill me....

I feel the same way (smack you upside the head) when I see people buying those frozen peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. You have way too busy of a life to even have a child if you can't take a minute make a PBJ!! Even if you toast the bread it only adds one more minute to prep time...

I can't be real bread, either. The thought of them makes my skin crawl!!

Playtex tampon applicator?

You know, stored in a certain...area, that would be the best anti-rape device in the world.

What if your kids don't LIKE hotdogs?

Then the terrorists win, Ralph, the terrorists win.

Obligitory simpson's reference:

"What? Toilet paper hung in improper overhand fashion!"

Non-linear hotdogs are for maddogs and Englishmen.

hey i'll be honest michelle, until i saw this product, i never would've even CONSIDERED slicing up my hot dog to look like an octopus.

and i'll also admit. this thing is just cool as hell.

i also feel the homer simpsons in me....

hey look!!! it's an octopus, that's made out of a hot dog!!! hee hee hee....

I don't know exactly where this trick came from, but its a common one in the culinary arts. They've also been doing it in Japan for years, usually with smaller dogs, like vienna sausages. Usually you also make a couple of slits after cooking and use some pimentos and olive bits to give the little bastards a face.

Pick up a book on Garde Manger sometime, the stuff you can turn your food into in few minutes with just a knife and some toothpicks is mind-blowing.

Child safety, what a racket...

Bread de-cruster? Yeah, it's called a knife. :^)

Life is very strange. If I had never stumbled across this blog, I most likely would have gone to my grave in complete ignorance of the octodog's existence in our cultural landscape...