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the buy nothing left: back in black

The anti-everything brigade has come up with some stupid ideas in their time (see, naked protests, Buy Nothing Day, primal screaming), but this new one has to be the king of all idiotic ideas:

Beware the black spot.

poster01.gifThis is the mark of the people who don't approve of Bush's plan to control the world, who don't want countries "liberated" without UN backing, who can't stand anymore neo-con bravado shoved down their throats.

Yes, a black spot.

It's like 666 for politics. Quick, check her back! Ewww she's got a black spot on her, throw the holy water of the rainforest on her!

On July 4th, you will see big black spots everywhere - covering bus stop ads and billboards, in the New York Times, on MTV and most likely defacing store windows and your car.

It stains the logos and smears the nerve centers of the world's biggest corporations.

Yea, sure it does. Because Sony and Universal and GM are all going to quake in fear at the sight of a bunch of greasy-haired kids in anarchist symbol t-shirts sticking black dots on walls.


Wait. Before you clamor for your big black spots, you have to take the secret oath:

Because my country has sold its soul to corporate power, Because consumerism has become our national religion, Because we've forgotten the true meaning of freedom, And because patriotism now means agreeing with the president, I pledge to do my duty . . . and take my country back.

And you will do this by putting stickers everywhere as far as the eye can see.

So, let me get this straight. The very people who complain that the economy is tanking are the ones who don't want you to buy anything.

Logic is not their strong suit, I guess.

Beware the black dot. Don't say I didn't warn you.

[Oh, and anyone who sticks a black dot on a piece of property that I own will have said black dot crammed so far down their throat they will shit out ink blots for the next ten years]

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take my Nike-wearing children to Friday's for a dinner of corporate-owned food.

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Listed below are links to weblogs that reference the buy nothing left: back in black:

» Beware the dot! from Inoperable Terran
On July 4, commies everywhere will cover things in black dots to prove that capitalism sucks and empower blacks and women and stuff. Michele ain't having ANY of that. Need I even mention that hilarity ensues?... [Read More]

» "Whatever Will We Do?", Part the 752nd or so... from The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
Via L.C. Hodadenon and L.C. and Notorious Blogger Michele comes this the latest dispatch about the nefarious and irresistible plans... [Read More]

» Beware the Black Spot!!! from Inoperable Terran
Michele has all the info. ph34r... wait, isn't the fact that it's a black spot racist?... [Read More]

» Hey, you have a black spot on your... from Mudville Gazette
From The Emperor, who notes that Michele first reported on the same. The loony Left has finally hit on a foolproof method to gain respectability and bring Bush down! The Black Spot! In the coming months a black spot will... [Read More]

Comments

It seems that we Brits are a step ahead of the US in the being silly with the color black department.

There's a movement to replace some of the white in the British flag with black. See this BBC article:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/2981038.stm

Apparently, when black people in the UK see a bit of black incorporated into the Union Jack, they are supposed to become instantaneously convinced that racism therefore no longer exists in Britain.

So if I put one of those blackdots on my website, will that keep the moobats away? Sort of like the red or black thumbtack to keep the Jehovah's Witnesses from knocking on the door?

COOL!

..."Because consumerism has become our national religion..."

I'm sorry, what do you want the national religion to be? Hopefully something focused towards a higher power that stands for good.

You can never be too dramatic, I guess.

"Arrrrrghh...it be the Black Spot...the mark of death, Jim 'awkins...

'n them that dies 'll be the lucky ones!"

      -Long John Silver

How about gettin a bunch of little American flags to put over these stupid dots.

We shall fight meaninglelss symbolism with,more SYMBOLISM!

(I wonder if the dirties will make the labels themselves, since buying a shitload of them from Staples will, like, empower the Corporation, uhm, man!)

Actually, even though I loathe Ayn Rand, I want to put up green stickers with gold dollar signs in them over the black dots.

I like the secret oath--it's cute. "Awwww, look at the lefties, pledging allegiance to the dot!" Do you suppose they get decoder rings, too?

Wow, for once I got to a topic before Michele did. Of course, you stated things a tad more succinctly, but the rant is pretty much the same.

And, as one of my commenters brilliantly pointed out, unbrandamerica.org is based in. . .get ready for it. . . CANADA.

Jeepers! Leftie protestors have gotten hold of my kitchen floor! My left rear quarter-panel on my shitty old car! My favorite sweat-shirt! BASTARDS!!

What? Those were already there? Well, how am I supposed to tell the protest statements from otherwise innocuous stains? It's a VAST LEFT WING CONSPIRACY!!

D

Now I know what that black spot on my ummm....@#$!& is. Thanks for clearing that up.

Too bad they didn't think of that before Ash Wednesday.

We have achieved Barnification, which means it no longer matters what you do or if there is any postivie impact in your actions, as long as you feel good about yourself. "I'm special... I tried."

"On July 4th . . .

Because victimism has become your national religion

Because you think freedom means everyone has to think the way you do

And because patriotism means that no matter how much you disagree with the president, I don't have to agree with you

I pledge to do my duty . . .

and keep my country out of the hands of you raving nutjobs. "

I'm thinking - this slogan plus a bright red dot over a section of the Sunday comics? :-)

Where will the black dot you cram down some fuckwit's throat meet up with the one I cram up his butt for defacing my property?

If yar catch one of thar moonbats puttin thar dreaded black spot on yar booty, challenge em to cutlasses on th quarterdeck. All that granola doesn't make for much endurance. Then its your choice to keelhaul em or make em walk the plank... I'm for keelhauling. Under my car, doing 60, on a gravel road. AVAST!

OT: Did you hear about the new pirate movie?
I hear its rated ARRRR

Eventually, they all died of [gangrene], but the spot lived happily ever after.

i knew you wouldn't let me down.

Say, does a melanoma count?

It's a perfect symbol for that crowd--it doesn't require the user to be able to read, write, or understand English (or any other language, for that matter). Just about their speed, particularly if they trace it in fecal matter.

Damn, looks like they already got to my driveway!

/\/\ ArtChick
\ /
\/

Oh, look. See Spot. See Spot convey biting political message.

this black dot campaign would be really funny if it weren't so irritating.

I guess the two orifices of choice are already taken, so I guess if one of these idiots approaches my property with their stickers, I'll have to stuff it in their ear.

maybe I'll get a bunch of Hello Kitty stickers to put over any black dots I see. Not because I stand for anything but because Hello Kitty is cuter than something that looks like bird poo.

BLACK SPOT? F*cking racists... :P

Z-.

Count me out on the black spot movement . Consumerism IS the national religion , right behind the fundamentalists who say their way is the ONLY way to eternity.... . to be a success you've got to have money so you can consume , consume, consume.... to tell with the environment, to hell with raising healthy children, to hell with keeping your parents out of a death warehouse (aka "nursing home ")..what matters is a bigger house and fancier car, sports and shoving your religion down someone's throat or you'll crucify them.

I'll quit my job and start pasting black spots everhwhere. Better black spots than the swatzika or the cross . The hippies are making a comeback in the nic of time.