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a baby by any other name

A Chinese couple have named their child Saddam Sars to mark the current world events when the child was born.

Imagine if this became a trend. Any babies born around these parts in the next month or so could be named West Nile. Having a baby in New York City? Some choice names would include Bloomberg Sucks, Put That Cigarette Out, Fiscal Disaster or Raise Taxes.

Other baby names trendsetters could use: Hazing Ritual (you could just call her Hazel) or Nuke Happy Kim.

Perhaps you are more concerned with the entertainment industry than world news. Zeta-Jones Fatty would be a good name for you newborn girl. Perhaps Wolverine for a boy, or Not Another Eddie Murphy Movie! The possibilities are endless. Why stick with Emily or Jason when you can name your kid WMD?

If I followed the same rule of baby naming as this couple did, Natalie would be name Kuwait
and DJ would be named Buffalo Bills Get Their Asses Kicked Again.

Iím pretty sure there wonít be a lot of babies named Dixie Chick or Freedom Fries.


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Or you could have named DJ "No one wants to visit me in the hospital, boo hoo"

Or perhaps I should have named him "My Sister Cares More about her LOSER Football Team Than Her Godson"

Reminds me of an old joke:

A young Indian boy walks up to his father one day, and asks him, "Father, how do we, the People, name our children?"

His father looks up from the hide he has been skinning, stretches, and pauses to think a moment. He then responds:

"Well, son, the traditional way is that, at the moment of the child's birth, his father looks outside of the tee-pee, and the first thing he sees is the name of the newborn.

"For example, if the father saw a single deer running through a field, the child could be named Lone Deer. If he saw a beautiful sunset, the child might be named Setting Sun. If the grass was long, and the wind was blowing through it, his name might be Dancing Grass.

"Do you understand?"

"Yes, Father, I think so."

"Good. Why do you ask, Two Dogs Fucking?"

You can joke about people naming their kids things like Wolverine, but the sad thing is it actually happens.

About two years ago, just after the first X-Men movie had been released a doctor friend of mine assisted in the birth of a child called Rogue.

On the subject of weird names---

A few years ago here in DC there was a drink called Thug Passion that was popular with the 'gangsta crowd.' It's ingredients were Moet and Alize. It was during this time that I was looking through the birth announcements in the Post and saw that someone had actually named their baby girl Moet Alize. No lie, these people named their child Thug Passion.

I went to elementary school with a girl named Chanda Lear. I learned later that she started to use her middle name. And my roommate in college dated a guy named Justin Case. I had a ball with that one!

I'm naming my kid Gilligan Skipper, boy or girl.

If my parents had behaved in this manner, I might be named Six Day War O'Malley. Or 1st Heart Transplant O'Malley.

What a reprehensible thing to do to a person. Sorry to be a wet blanket yet again, but these people who really are giving their children weird names for their own amusement need to be raped to death by rabid grizzlies. That name that seemed so funny/clever at the time is going to be a major nuisance all through your poor kid's life. Kids are not possessions, they are not souvenirs.

My doctor actually named her baby boy Jaeger, because she lovede theRolling Stones. And yes, her second was named Keith.

Hmmm. I'm not sure exactly what it is that you're trying to say here.

I probably would've been Summer Of Love or Bomb Hanoi or something. (Either that or Moon Unit, though I think that name was taken already.)

Also, I went to junior high school with twins named Mona and Lisa.

My wife once knew a girl that was named "Sy Phyllis". Her father saw the name at the hospital and thought it was a lovely name for a girl.

Think of how many kids would have been named "star wars" or "reaganomics" "no new taxes" or "not gonna do it"

Perhaps little Saddam Sars will have some playmates with equally distrurbing names so he wont be ostracized. Like, I don't know, say...

Brezhnev Black Death?
Kruschev Consumption?
Hitler Hep-C?
Ayatollah AIDS?
Mussolini Mad Cow?

What the hell is the matter with those parents, anyhow?! Poor kid!

Three are times, I'm happy we have restricitve laws in germany. Especially when it comes to lwas about names. Here a father wanted his son to be named Osama Bin Laden and he did not just get ti get another name for his son, he also has to face a judge because of supporting a terrorist. We have a law that forbids unusual names. When you want to name your child and the registration person does have doubts you have to bring references (sensible ones) or go to a judge and have it cleared by a jury. Why don't these children sue their parents?

No, changed my mind. I think it will be Razzle Dazzle instead, boy or girl.

I looked up my year of birth and am relieved that I wasn't named Nuke Nevada, James Dead Dean, Streisand Sings, or Rosa Parks Elvis. Even worse would have been to be Siamese Twins AFL and CIO.

Having a baby in New York City? Some choice names would include...

Nosmo King

Nice Carmen Sandiego reference, Angie! (Your middle name wouldn't happen to be O'Graham, would it?)

Heavens, I'm so glad they didn't do that to me. I was born on September 3, 1953, the 14th anniversary of the start of WWII. "Blitzkreig?" "Adolpha?" People are crazy.

Imperial Keeper