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coming soon to a theater near you

A Moroccan publication accused the government Monday of providing unusual assistance to U.S. troops fighting in Iraq by offering them 2,000 monkeys trained in detonating land mines.


Forget precision bombs, unmanned spy-planes and high-tech weaponry, the U.S. army is about to unveil its most unlikely mine detector -- all the way from San Diego, California, the Atlantic Bottle-Nosed Dolphin.

I sense a rivalry in the making. The hell with that, I see a movie in the making.

Dolphins v. Monkeys. Think West Side Story with with explosions.

Someone get me casting!


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A Small Victory: "army is about to unveil its most unlikely mine detector -- all the way from San Diego, California, the Atlantic Bottle-Nosed Dolphin." [Read More]


Flipper Goes Planet of the Apes! It'll make millions! Have your people call their people and set something up for lunch at Spago.

Big problem: Monkey's don't swim, and dolphins suck in trees.

Maybe a three-way war with lots of sea lion mercenaries...

Dude, this is a MOVIE!

Think Dolphins with wings and monkeys with mechanized flippers.

Where is your imagination, sir?

Robert,Robert,Robert.We could make it a documentary and probably win the Oscar next year.

i just keep picturing those poor dolphins flopping around on the sand. "there's a mine over here!" flaps flipper crappy job, but you have to do something when you retire from sea world.

The dialogue is likely to suck though.

"ook..ookook ook, ook, ook, ookookook"
(monkey has tear in his eye, dolphin smacks him with a flipper)

Could be the perfect subject for Monkey-butt Moore's next docudrivel.

you mean kinda like mojo the helper monkey! Yeeeyyyyyy!

Right now, the folks at PETA must be hard at work putting together another delightful ad campaign featuring Holocaust footage.

Hmmm, two hours of monkies throwing their own feces into the ocean and dolphins feverishly boinking one another under water. I'd pay to see it.

I would gladly pay money for a crude transcript, never MIND the admission!

If they added a whale, they could call it Free Willy's Flipper, Koko.

Are you SURE the French aren't in on this war?

You're all forgetting that the computer generated feces are going to drive the budget way overboard.

Just imagine sitting at a computer terminal all day, drawing poop texture mapping...

i keep seeing a monkey in SCUBA gear clinging to a saddle strapped onto Flipper.

Flipper dives toward a mine! It's active! Cheetah frantically taps morse code onto the mic hidden in the saddle, warning the submarine to stay away!

Back inside the sub, Sean Connery suddenly puts up the periscope and ponders his choice to defect...

huh. oops.

Sounds like "Startide Rising", a science fiction novel by David Brin about a space ship crewed by 'uplifted' dolphins and 1 chimp scientist.

Thank you BigFire.

When I saw the still of the dolphon with the camera attached to his fin today, I said "Startide Rising".

PETA is going to have a cow (or whatever vegie thing is comparable).

I believe that would be a rutabaga.

This Just In...

"According to the wire service, Morocco's weekly al Usbu' al-Siyassi claimed that Morocco has offered 2,000 monkeys to help detonate land mines.

An official at the Moroccan Embassy could not confirm the presence of monkeys in the coalition of the willing."

In related news, Switzerland has donated 1,000 pounds of cheese on the condition France supplies the surrendering.

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Shouldn't someone call Siegfried & Roy?