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my mom can beat up your mom

Michele is a blogger who is currently pretending to be Jim Treacher who is a blogger who is currently pretending to be interviewed for the "Who Could You Take in a Fight?" feature at this week's Onion A.V. Club.

The Onion: Who could you take in a fight?

Michele: What kind of fight? Will there be guns? Knives? Fisticuffs?

O: Fisticuffs

Michele: Dave Barry. I could so kick Dave Barry's ass.

O: But why would you want to?

Michele: Because I can, Onion. Because I can.


I am dying for someone to ask me who I could take!! Ask me! Ask me!

I'll bite: Who could you take in a fight, Fran?

Well, thank you for asking, Kevin!

I could take every guy who stands at the bus stop and repeatedly spits, gazing at it, entertaining himself with his disgusting fluids! Like the one this morning! Arrrgh!! Turns my stomach! Especially at 7 am! My inner riot grrrl was swinging a baseball bat upside his phlegmy head! What is WRONG with some people!

Aahh... better. Have a nice day! :-)

yo fran, who do you think you can take on? i think those people at the busstop would own you sooo bad and that you would probably get hurt because you sound like a fucking nerd who wants to be cool.