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friday feebleness

Your computer may be killing you

There's a new disease in town and its name is e-thrombosis.

Sitting at a computer for long periods of time could kill you, according to a new study reported in the February 2003 edition of the European Respiratory Journal.

It says there is a risk of developing life-threatening blood clots from sitting for long periods at a computer, similar to a problem that has injured or killed some airline passengers on long flights.

What a modern sounding name for a disease. e-thrombosis.

The report centers on a case from New Zealand in which a young man who spent up to 18 hours a day sitting at his computer nearly died after developing a massive blood clot that formed in his leg veins, broke off and traveled to his lungs, a condition called pulmonary embolism.

If you spend 18 hours a day at your computer - and let's face it, this guy was probably playing Everquest or trying to find free porn, you have other things to worry about besides blood clots in your leg.

For instance:

e-bizmarkie, which is marked by an inordinate amount of weight gain in one's posterior.

e-flashitis - symptoms include crossing of the eyes and a sudden drop in IQ cauesed by watching too many flash movies such as Viking Kitties and Peanut Butter Jelly Time.

e-flamosis - a burning sensation in your fingers brought on by participating in too many online flame wars.

e-colon disease - marked by stomach aches and a slight bloating, this is what happens when you have a steady diet of soda and peanut butter crackers and refuse to leave your computer chair to go to the bathroom.

e-visineitis - a sudden drying out of the eyes; a symptom of staring too long in incredulous horror when reading stories like this.

e-gads - A sudden shut down of the brain that causes you to reach into your "save for a rainy day" file and post drivel such as this.

Give me some time to make it up to you. Don't abandon me just yet.

Now go say happy anniversary to Juan.


First the low rider jeans that make your thighs tingle, now this... I guess we'll all just have to surf the net naked and standing up.

Thanks, Chele, I just needed one good excuse to let Lew let me quit my job. WOO HOO!

Just goes to confirm my long-held belief that life is a fatal disease and no one survives.

Don't laugh...I went through two blot clots in my legs before Christmas, and they think the amount of time I sit in front of a computer (Hello, it's my job!) had a lot to do with it.

That's okay though...lately we're doing enough running around in circles chasing our tails to make sure it doesn't happen again.

Is e-flashitis similar to e-flashtitis? I figure there's going to be an outbreak of e-flashtitis going on at that blogwhere thing when the challenge rounds build up.

Ummm... I think I need to go for a walk.

Hey! What's wrong with Viking Kitties? :)

This is the best news i heard all day. I've been trying to kill myself for years, and I can do it just by sitting at my computer?


Cos I'm really disappointed at the effects of taking up smoking. Apparently I'm still healthy, and the excessive amounts of tequila and gin aren't giving me liver failure either.

Damn metabolism.

Raymond, we will mourn your loss

raymond was retarded and if you spend 18 hours a day on the computer please wear sunglasses when you go out because you are probably albino


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