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on my knees

This is the third year of the Bloggies and thus, I'm sure, the third year that people are bitching about the nominees.

Last year it was the Wil Wheaton backlash. Yes, I was part of that, mainly because Wil was nominated in every single category. I think he was even up for best Asian weblog.

I see that a few people are not happy with the nominees this year. Specifically, there are some people who are not at all happy with the inclusion of yours truly.
Laurence is pissed and Richard Bennett is boycotting the awards. Mr. Bennett also thinks that I run a pretty thin political blog and shouldn't have been nominated in that category. Then again, judging from Bennett's comments on Dawn's bloggie post, I don't think he really likes any of the nominees. Better luck next year, Richard.

Then there's Bruce the Anonymous, also on Dawn's blog who says:

Michele gave someone a slobbery knobscicle? I'd say more like 20 to land in the untouchable clique of little yellow different and the other high schoolers. Call me huge.pink.pissed off over this unvictory.

I think Bruce is just pissed because he wasn't on the list of people I needed to give blowjobs to in order to get nominated.

Basically, what I thought was a pretty neat thing to happen to me has progressed from something that made me smile to something that has made me feel cheap and meaningless. You can bet every god damn dollar you have that if Glenn Reynolds or Stephen Green or Ken Layne (all of whose blogs I read religiously) were nominated, half the people who are whining right now would not be doing so.

The blogosphere is bigger than your little corner of the world, people. Thousand of blogs out there - your clique isn't the only one in existence.

Yes, awards do tend to get silly and controversial and to most people, they mean nothing and may as well not exist.

I didn't nominate myself. I didn't whore myself out. I certainly did not give head for votes, as I save that favor for more important things.

But I will tell you this: If I win, I am going to be live via cam or whatever from my house to accept the award, and I'll be wearing Lara Flynn Boyle's pink tutu and ballet slippers and I will say something like "I'd like to thank all the dicks I sucked to get this award."


Listed below are links to weblogs that reference on my knees:

» Little hellions, kids feeling rebellious from Ain't too proud to blog
Controversy Controversy I can't understand human curiosity Controversy Was it good for you? Was I what you wanted me to be? Controversy... Listen, people call me rude I wish we were all nude I wish there was no black and white I wish there were no rule... [Read More]

» HOW GREEN IS MY BLOGGIE: from PontifexExMachina.com
Centrs reports that the Bloggies have been rigged. Let's all sit around and feign suprise. Michelle of A Small Victory, [Read More]


And I'd like to thank Bruce for giving me the excuse to say: I LOVE YOU MICHELE, YOU COCKSUCKER!

Please tell me you're not joking about that Pink Tutu thing. I really, really want a Vidcap of that. I would use it as my screensaver.

Actually, I think I'm going to make a costume that is part Lara Flynn tutu and part Bjork swan dress.

I love you too, Bill - you whipped cream covered cocksucking fool.

Did I come across as saying you didn't deserve the finalisting? Well, shit. First, I flame Treacher by mistake in an attempt to blast pussies who constantly threaten to quit blogging to get more attention, and now I attack the system that resulted in Scott Ott being overlooked (the only 100% pure humor blogger, I might add, never tempted to post stupid shit about cats and bread and such like I fall back into) and end up twisting your tit by mistake.

Well, shit. Twice.

Maybe I need to work up my own asshole-filter in Word 97? I guess tomorrow, I'm going to step on Superman's cape and piss into the wind.


That was one person being angry, other than Richard, who has accused me of giving blowjobs for far more trivial things that a blog award, everyone is pleased as punch for you.

Don't project the outrage over the obnoxious omissions of the clearly greats of blogosphere on to yourself. You are one of us and we are happy for you. It's the only reason I didn't suggest some sort of incidious attack on the Fairvue staff to be honest.

We love you and you should hold your head high above this petty nonsense. To each blog award ceremony comes whining. It will just encourage more types of awards in the future.

Noblesse Oblige my good gal - rise above it all!

Oh my fucking hell, people! Can't this woman do anything right? Can't she be happy about something for five minutes without people jumping all over her?

Make up your mind! Either the bloggies don't fucking matter, so who the hell cares if the nomination process is flawed OR they're the blogosphere's most prestigious award, deserving ten feet of post space on everyone's blog.

It's a popularity contest.
Get over it.
Michele's popular.
Get over it.

Dammit. Now, you went and made me swear. I hate that shit.

(M, you know where to send your "chill out, dude" messages.)

What's wrong with giving blowjobs for votes? If the world ran like that neither Algore nor George Bush would be President.

It would either be some unknown gay guy, or, remotely, Monica Lewinsky.

Besides, you deserve to win. And damn those calluses on your knees.

I hate the bloggies.

Whipped cream and chocolate, please. And none of that Hershey's crap - Belgian or Swiss only.

Michele, you have to learn to ignore the assholes. (No, I don't mean you, Lair. I didn't get that read on your post at all.)

You deserve the nomination. You write a kick-ass weblog.

And the fact that LGF and Sullivan made it through the tech filter (and the techblog world is very left-leaning, and no, I'm not using that as an insult) leads me to believe that not a lot of people DID vote for Instapundit or the others people are upset were excluded.

Now, if the guys are giving out oral sex for votes, c'mon over to my place. I vote. And I'm single.

Hmmm. On the one hand you have a "slobbery knobsicle" and on the other is Michele's comic collection....

As Joey from Friends would say "Put your hands together... :)"

Hey, I placed my vote, and in cognizant ignorance of the Blogosphere 3 of them went here.

Congrats on the nomination and good luck.

Congratulations, Michelle. I remember your blog from the beginning.

Michele, Michele...you give these assclowns too much credit and power. Fuck them.

Enjoy the experience, you earned it.

'nuff said?

I think Michele has already earned an award:

I love you, baybee!

p.s. You should hand out these at the award ceremony.

now, when you gave out all these blowjobs, did you swallow?

man, just tell all these haters:

"Don't hate the playa... hate the game."

Congratulations! I'm so proud of you!

Bill- Both I and my boss enjoyed your artwork.

Heh - sorry, Joe. I checked with Michele before posting but couldn't really email her whole readership to take a poll. :D

You know... I was thrilled to death to see you, Davezilla, Mikey, Tracy, and so many others nominated.

The reason you and everyone else is on that list is because you support your friends instead of whining "what about me" like that freakin' crybaby up there. You friends, in turn, nominated you, and will vote for you.

Blowjobs or not.

(You really gave nominators bj's? Why wasn't I told?)

Who is Richard Bennett and why the hell should anyone care that he's boycotting the Bloggies?

Is this the equivalent of Moby boycotting war?

No worries, Bill, I'll have to take a pass on "taking a pole", so to speak, though.

chokes on coffee
You know, I was a perfect innocent until you said that.

I was reading over at Radley Balko's site (theagitator.com) and richard bennett showed up being a dick. seems like he is everywhere pissing people off. or at least would like us to think he's everywhere....

I nominated you. I didn't get any.

I don't know who Richard Bennett is. I don't know who a lot of the blogs that have been mentioned on many of those sites. I feel so out of the loop.

I'll make you feel cheap and meaningless, baby. Just come on down to Flor-eeee-da! ;-)

I voted for you, of c ourse. And for the local girl who got pinged for best kept secret. I was even a little disappointed that your tagline wasn't a nominee (it's better than all five that are).

I must say, though, that I was surprised Prof. Reynolds didn't get any nominations. It's not hard to imagine how many he would have received had he so much as linked the page with a tepid suggestion, yet he never did.

i gobbled no knob and i'm pleased as shit to have been nominated. i didn't even mention the awards on my site, so it was a surprise to me.

Don't pay no attinion

Don't pay no attinion

What did I tell you last night?

No really ... I can't fucking remember.

But I might add, definitely, these awards, good or bad, bring out the baby in so many otherwise intelligent and emotionally stable people.

It's okay to be disappointed. It's not okay to whine. This is just like when Mattie throws a fit because I won't let him play with an outlet. He's 11 months old.

Move on.

You so have my vote.

melly - I'm not emotionally stable. I'm not even architecturally stable. One strong quake, and I'm in pieces on the floor.


Why do the same blogs have to win every year anyway? People keep bitching that there are none of the true biggies out there, but I thought there was still some fairly excellent content if you looked for it.

DAMN it! I was going to wear the pink tutu! But now you're leaving, and I am bummed. You truly deserve to be there.