til the nukes come down on the santa monica boulevard
And people wonder why I spend so much time making fun of celebrities who gather like sheep at the first sign of a leftist action.
They have these simplistic views of the world and its problems. They think it all can be solved by just talking it out or trying ot be nicer or bending over so your enemies can fuck you up the ass, which is called appeasement in some places.
The long line of celebrities has been forming into a herd since the first mentions of a possible war against Iraq. The No Blood For Oil and Think About the Children crowds have signed petitions, formed grass-roots groups and have blamed America for everything except the death of Elvis. Barbara Streisand, Martin Sheen, Sean Penn, Viggo Mortenson - they flash their t-shirts and go on Larry King and do everything but offer alternative to solutions to the problems at hand. It's pretty easy for them to sit back in cozy little mansions and shout "No War!" But it's almost laughable when they appear on some talk show or news program and the best alternative to military action they can come up with is, for all intents and purposes, to sit down for a cup of tea with our enemies and smoke the peace pipe.
The latest celebrity to come out of the anti-war closet is Sheryl Crow. Flush with the success of her American Music Awards last night, she showed the world her sparkly little t-shirt, all sequined with the words "war is not the answer." But, unlike other stars, Ms. Crow has the solution!
"I think war is based in greed and there are huge karmic retributions that will follow. I think war is never the answer to solving any problems. The best way to solve problems is to not have enemies."
Oh, how simple! The problem is, we did not create these enemies. Contrary to popular belief, we did not do anything to instigate an attack on American soil. We did not do anything except be a prosperous, democratic country. The problem is, our enemies want us all to convert to Muslim. They want us to lock down our women and behead those who make the most minor of legal transgressions and stone women who have been raped. They want us to raise our children to hate and kill.
Not have any enemies? What would you have us do, Ms. Crow? Bow down to those who wish death upon us just so they see us as friends?
As for the huge karmic retributions, I think there are at least five world leaders who should get theirs before any bad karma comes floating our way.
Just a word of advice to the celebrities who wish to drag us into their fantasy world of peace and love and happiness and socialism: Think before you speak. Think before you put those t-shirts on. Have answers ready for the questions you are sure to be asked. Come up with some viable solutions before you blast the actions that are already in motion. By viable, I mean based in reality.