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club katana

update: I knew that if I made any factual, historical or cultural errors in the forming of Club Katana, Toren would come around eventually and set things right. And he has. Please see the comments so you can learn all about the katana. There will be a written exam right before the initiation rituals.


Todd and I are forming a club. Its called the Katana Club and our motto is "Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the morons who plague us!

All you need to join is the willingness to learn how to use a katana and a total lack of remorse when it comes to destroying your enemies. It also helps if you look as good in robes as Toshiro Mifune.

All meetings will videotaped so we can dub and subtitle them.

Thanks to intrepid reader Carol, we also have a logo and alternate motto:

[click for big, scary size]

Too much time on my hands, I know. But tell me you don't want to join Club Katana.

Comments

Oh, oh, oh! Pick me! I wanna join! Actually, I've always daydreamed about having a naginata, but katanas rule too.

Mmm, Toshiro Mifune.

I'll join, and I already know how to use a katana! hehehe, not very well, but better than most.

Does knowing how to use pretty much any portable gun ever made count?

Me, me!
I'v enever used a katana per se, but I have done stage combat classes and so do actually know something about using a sword.

Does sharp wit count? I'll try and get some, if so.

Is this an off-shoot of S.P.O.R.K?

I'd look pretty bad-ass in robes, with an Aikuchi Tanto hidden up each sleeve... very ronin.

Now I have to go watch Ninja Scroll...

D, you can join as long as you don't bring Moby with you. He would look just silly with a sword.

I used to study Iaido back in Okinawa- So, I come equipped with my own Katana, Hakuma, and Hori (those really cool robes you were talking about). How do we know who gets to do who's dubbing? I love doing dubbing. Badly, that is.

Ok, Justin...you're the secretary of defense of Club Katana.

I think I'll ask Jessica to do the dubbing.

Well, as long as I can be in the "club flamberge" or "club claymore" branch. I was on the fencing team in college, so "club epee" might even work. The closest I ever want to come to a katana is my baseball bat substitute bokken.

Decent swords, katanas, but so overrated by so many it makes me want to scream.

Kick ass.
(mouth moving waaaay too much)

I want to be in any club that, even partly, quotes "Conan the Barbarian". Love. That. Movie. (Cheese factor 11)

Can I join, even though I prefer Western fencing (foil and epee), I haven't done it in years, and I can't fit in my gear except for my glove and mask?

It was about 20 years and forty pounds ago. . .

I own a katana, currently take classes in its use, and own many Toshiro Mifune movies on DVD, so can I join?

Who will we fight? Do we have a rival ninja clan?

I'm in - you have to teach me though.

BTW, if you like katanas, check out the trailer for the movie Kill Bill.

I look great in robes, my roommate's nickname is Ninjababe, and I've been reading a series of books about a 16th century Samurai! Oh, and I've held my friend's Highlander katana. Do I qualify?

Will my collection of Sikh and Indian edged weapons and study of Gatka (Indian sword style) qualify?

I'll join, but only if I can be Tomisaburo Wakayama from Lightning Swords Of Death, and wheel a boobytrapped baby cart across the land killing Ninja with it.

I don't have a katana, but I practice katana technique with an axe handle on a regular basis. No, really. I can swat bees with a splitting maul, too.

I look great in a bathrobe.

What is this "remorse" of which you speak?

As an aikidoist, I practice regularly with a wooden Japanese sword, a bokken. So I would be happy to join the club and learn from some no-kidding swordsmen.

Oh, you can all join! We'll have a fencing division and a gun division, which Misha will head up.

Now, we just need some rivals to fight.

most excellent. will a no-dachi do?

Oh Oh Oh! Can't use a katana but I had a fencing class in college... okay, a long time ago. But I own Seven Samurai on dvd... does that count? I can be in the weenie second string.

Will there be a secret initiation ritual? Can it involve Aragorn or Legolas? [g]

That pic is not a katana but some lame Chinese (?) copy of a daito.
Here's a nice, nasty-looking katana for you to use as the official "poster weapon" of the club.
Moriyoshi
Moriyoshi (full size)
But it must always be used for righteousness, and please clean the blood off afterwards. That high-carbon steel rusts like a bastard.

About the blade:
Katana
Signature: Minamoto Moriyoshi. Shuku Kanreki Yamada Kenzan. Showa Kanoto-Tori Nen 8 Gatsu Hi.
The blade is polished, in a shirsaya.
Blade length: 71.8cm or 28.27 inches.
Sori: 2.3cm or 0.91 inch.
Width at the hamachi: 3.45cm or 1.34 inches.
Width at the yokote: 3.1cm or 1.22 inches.
Era: Showa period, August 1981.
Shape: A well-proportioned shinogi-zukuri katana. O-kissaki, wide mihaba and thick kasane.
Horimono: Bo-hi is carved on the both sides of the blade.
Jitetsu: Jinie appears on the clear itame-hada. It resembles that of Horikawa Kunihiro.
Hamon: Nie-deki, gorgeous gunome-midare includes soft ashi, kinsuji and sunagashi. Midarekomi-boshi.

Tanigawa Moriyoshi was born in 1920. He learned under Kongobyoe Moritaka Yasuhiro and Enju Taro Nobushige. Moriyoshi made swords at Yatsushiro in Kumamoto prefecture. He won his reputation by reviving the hamon of Kiyomaro and was designated an honorable Mukansa-tosho at the NBTHK in 1985. He passed away in 1990, aged 70.
Moiryoshi made this katana in his latter years to the personal order of Mr. Kenzan Yamada.

"Hee hee hee. Whats's a skeletor?"

HEY! You're forming a discriminatory club. I demand that you allow me to become a member AND run for office.

I may not own a katana or know how to use one, but that's because umm.. I was oppressed by somebody.

Tell it to Tiger Woods, lady!

Actually, you can join if you can just pretend that you would like to use a katana.

Can I join? I already have my own Katana.

It's hanging on my wall behind me right now, and it's blade is yet to taste blood. Or be sharpened.

Wow, look at all the interest our club has generated. I can't wait to start excluding people indiscriminately! Whee!

Damn, now I need a button for my blog and a bumpersticker for my SUV...

Can my sock-puppet join?

I already know how to use a katana. Heh.

Shinkendo, it is called.

Though I am bad out of practice...moved away from the dojo after college and all.

(Waves hand frantically from the back of the crowd, indicating a willingness to at least pretend interest in a Katana.)

(Returns to top of page to check out picture of Katana.)

(Has Belushi moment, and gleefully returns to Post A Comment, while thinking of the joyful fun of pretending to be "Samurai Tailor".)

Where can you find out how to take katana classes?

Kon-nichi-wa _x

I want some information about what does this club is all about and what do you do in it, please.

Im owner of two Shirasayas and im thinking to buy a new Katana.

Anybody who can help my can send my and e-mail or add me to his MSN list

Arigatou gosai shimasu _x

Sayonara

I'd like to learn how to use a Katana? but how will we learn?

i have what might be an authentic samurai sword
to see it goto: http://aocc383.com/Dscn4289.jpg
does it look real to u?

Have a katana, know how to use it and just bout any other weapon you show me. Can i join and when.?!?!?

Heh... I am me (_)(master of the obious) and I think not really of joining for I see no means in it, I own a Katana...and I know how to use it...I train with a Bokken with others I have taught to gain a sort of real battle experiance (please excuse my spelling) I use a nice style, a mix of many, even some moves I learned by watching kenshin if you can belive it....which I doubt you can concidering they were made for the sole perpose of an anime.... doesn't matter I need to be seen to be belived...oh well..... till next time, I gotta go train....
_

enemies are not to be crushed, they are to be defeated, and not when you are 12. The word 'moron' makes you sound 12. This is a page for boys who like swords, probally because its a weapon which you think 'looks cool' and might help stop you being bullyied at school. Get a life...for a start no-one should pick up a sword without knowing basic martial arts. This whole page is full of people who are trying to show off their basic lack of skill and knowledge...its an embaressment

...he brings up good points...but still...if he or she has so many...(for lack of a better word) dissagreements why leave a responce...you obiously have an intrest...also I...detest what you say I am not 12 nor do I show off a lack of skill....
_

Knowledge....hah....how about you go and try something...test your own knowledge...mathamatically prove a coin can't exist the way people think...have fun...then, only then mock other people of what they know...

hmmm..... it's been about 10 days, does that mean no one can anwser?

Puce, is that you?

I suppose it's really irony that a person has the nerve to call some one immature and unfit to wield a katana when their own arrogance is enough to demonstrate they should not be touching so much as a razor blade

Alright people what the hell?
The time of swords is completly over do you understand me? it is illegal to take a sword outside in a nomral community and swing it around like some samurai retard from the mejing era or the tokogawa era. PLEASE STOP ALRIGHT? MOVE TO JAPAN OR CHINA OR SOME WHERE ELSE IF YOU LIKE THIS SHIT DANCES

Almost anyone can be fit to have a gun, Why not a sword all you would need is the proper permit which at the moment I am trying to get, and just for your information you cannot hold a sword the same in Japan or China as well.
_

I wanna join, i just got a katana and want to learn how to use it

i wanna join your clit-i mean club...hmmm either or would do! I have a katana...like halberd-dont youd only be confused and start to think-now you wouldnt want to hurt your-self now would you...anyhow this club is a joke-ive been taught in many arts of swordsmanship...one thing you should know is that there are no clubs...ass-grow up.

I want to learn how to use a Katana!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you teach me!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!

Err...is this place still active? A "Katana" club? Interesting! Perhaps I will visit again, if anybody else does...

i know how to fence :p

I have a katana and i would love to learn to use it to vanquish my foes.

I all ready know how to fight with my sword, and I know Im way younger than all of you. But I want to get an understanding with my sword. Not just accindentaly cut things with it.

Ok, First of all, all of you guys are idiots. A "Club Katana", please, that is one of the stupidest ideas I have ever heard of! Accualy thinking you could "vanquish you Enemys" I have been taking Katana, Halberd, and Shoulin Spade classes for 12 years and trying to teach someone how to use one effectivly when not even a qualified trainer is about as smart as trying to teach a frog to do algebra. Look, if any of you people really wish to use a Katana or any other Chinese/Japenese weapons, join a martial arts class and learn to fight with your bare hands THEN try to use weapons, even a medium skilled person with a Katana would be no match for a skilled fighter. Also, more than 75% of Katanas you see for sale are not "Battle Ready", even if they say are, try cutting through a square foot cube of wood, Keep trying, if your "Katana" breaks on the first 20 times you try it, its just a decoration sword. Now, I am not a weapon expert but I know my fair share or info on the katana. If any of you guys really want to use one effectivly and accualy be able to use it right post another message asking and I will post my e-mail and answer any questions.

Oh, Sorry, Its me again.

Fencing does not even help you with a Katana, thier completly different swords that use differt arm muscles, and different forms.
The Katana is also not nearly as light as a fencing foil.

Oh here's a tip fo ryou Katana buyers, when shoping for a Katana look for a KNIFE shop or another weapons shop and then try to find out what metal the sword is made out of, Tempered Damascus steel that was folded is your best bet. If the sales person says it's iron or some other metal, GET TEH HELL AWAY FROM IT!

I would like to learn how to really use a katana. So drop me an e-mail please Nick and I will get back to you.

Garbage I spelled my own name wrong. I feel ashamed now.

I want a Katana really bad but not because i want to kill but because i appretiate the beauty of the weapon. In my opinion the invention of guns has taken all fairness and honor out of warfare.
When war was fought with blades and bows the soldiers requiered a great deal of skill. these days anyone with half a brain can run into battle and shoot the hell out of there enemy. Im ashamed with the world today all we care about is things we own. what ever happened to loyalty, honor and common decentcy. If i could ild rather live back when they used swords and bows and rode horses. Atleast then if i got the news that we had just defeated our enemy i could be proud and not ashamed that we bombed the hell out of 6000 innocent people to kill 6 people that were our enemy. In my life all i want to do is find someone to love who will love me back and be happy with my life. I dont care if i have no money, i dont care if i have a huge house and an expensive car so long as im happy with my life. For the last month ive been depressed with the world and theres very few things keeping me alive. Theres a small group of friends and the thought that maybe i can do something i really want to do. One day i would like to get a Katana and learn how to use it. Not so that i can just so i can be proud that i have acheived something in my pathetic excuse for a life. sorry ive bitched on like this but i thought people may want to hear my opinion for once. Goodbye and best of luck with your destroying your enemys and such. Maybe one day ill be lucky enough to own a Katana

gvhj

gvhj

I would also like to join, I myself have a katana longing for the sweet taste of blood of my enemy!