the uss new york
(Posted by Laurence Simon as part of the Amish Tech Support Occupation of A Small Victory during the holidays)
Michele's a New Yawker, so I figured quite a few of you folks are, too. Here's a little something for all you New Yawkers out there looking for a little Christmas cheer... scrap from the World Trade Center will be used to help build the USS New Yawk:
Sorry. I meant to say USS New York. My bad.
Steel salvaged from the wreckage of the World Trade Center will be used to build the Navy's USS New York, a warship named in honor of those who perished in New York on Sept. 11, 2001.
The scrap steel will be extricated from the Fresh Kills landfill on Staten Island on Friday and trucked south to a Northrop Grumman shipyard in Pascagoula, Miss. Northrop Grumman will start building the USS New York in Pascagoula in the middle of next year.
The USS New York will be the fifth of 12 amphibious assault ships in the San Antonio class, which the Navy calls one of its most technologically innovative. The 684-foot vessel will carry a Navy crew of 402 and up to 800 Marines.
I heard a rumor that they were could to use Al Sharpton's hair to weave into the mooring ropes, too.
Now, normally state names are reserved for submarines, but an exception has been made in this case to allow the USS New York label to be used on an assault vehicle instead of an undersea "Melt their sand pit into molten glass and singed camel dung" retaliatory vessel. Other states and cities are getting into the act now, begging to have their names placed on vehicles other than submarines:
USS New Jersey: Garbage scow for the USS New York.
USS Maryland: Army sniper transport.
USS New Orleans: A USO-run submarine that only sinks two inches a year.
USS Detroit: Floating mosque, hospital ship for enemy casualties.
USS Florida: Troop transport that can carry 5,000 Marines and 5,000 Army troops. Or was that 5,500 Marines and 4,500 Army Troops? We need a recount!
USS California: Designed as a nuclear-powered submarine, the pile's been shut down and it's forced to borrow power from the USS Texas