they made the baby jesus cry
"TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: WE HAVE YOUR BABY JESUS. IF YOU EVER WANNA SEE YOUR BABY JESUS AGAIN, LEAVE 800 DOLLARS IN SMALL BILLS, NOT TRACEABLE, IN THE MAILBOX OF ... WE WILL CONTACT YOU LATER WITH FURTHER INSTRUCTIONS. YOURS TRULY."
$800 for a plastic Jesus? For about 70 bucks the owners can run down to any mall and pick up another one.
Maybe they thought it was the real baby Jesus? In that case, they should have asked for a hell of a lot more than $800.
The note was signed:
The note was signed by "Me, him and the other kid who was really scared and didn’t want to take your baby Jesus and the whole time all he did was say stuff like you’re going to hell, this isn’t right, stop."
I'm sure I shouldn't find this amusing in any way, but I do. You really have to give the thieves credit with that note. They sure knew how to get in the local paper.
Comments
Michele -
Isn't kidnapping a plastic baby Jesus a crime and if isn't, shouldn't we make a law? Ha. Michele, you should find this fricking hilarious. Hilarious.
Posted by: John Venlet | December 16, 2002 08:28 PM
I am having a bad night and once again you have made me feel better. Not that I am laughing about a stolen Jesus but it was exactly what I needed to read!!! Thanks Michele! DRINKS TOMORROW OK?!
Posted by: Bon | December 16, 2002 09:11 PM
Oh, I found it way amusing. Who kidnaps a plastic lawn ornament? That isn't French, I mean. But the French, well, they're French. Maybe these were French exchange students. That could explain why they think somebody would pay $800 for a $69 ornament.
Posted by: Lesley | December 16, 2002 09:13 PM
70 dollars for a plastic jesus???
Downright robbery!!
you could rent a billboard---feed the poor with 70 dollars!!
Posted by: Sylvain | December 16, 2002 09:55 PM
"I don't care if it rains or freezes, I got me a plastic Jesus .... "
Name the movie that the song is from and you win $800 after I colle .... I mean after I get it from the money machine.
Posted by: The Other Kid, Jr. | December 16, 2002 10:30 PM
Hey. This just made me wonder about a moral conundrum.
If I steal a baby Jesus, do I go to hell for it? I mean, I'm Jewish, no hell, but it's a baby Jesus...
I'm so confused.
Posted by: Meryl Yourish | December 16, 2002 10:33 PM
Now...what we have here....is a fail-yah..to commune-cate.
Posted by: Cool Hand Luke | December 16, 2002 11:03 PM
This is why I keep reading your blog, Michele -- you laugh at the same things I do.
I just have to remember about the beer and monitor, is all...
Posted by: Troy | December 17, 2002 03:17 AM
You know, some times nothin is a pretty cool hand.
You win, Luke, and the check is in the mail!
;-}
Posted by: The Other Kid, Jr. | December 17, 2002 03:39 AM
there was a kid in my hometown that went to jail for stealing baby jesuses (yes, that's plural) -- nevermind the fact that i dated him...
Posted by: Jenna | December 17, 2002 10:15 AM
I always thought it was Jesi...
Posted by: michele | December 17, 2002 10:16 AM
Omigod--just yesterday I blogged about how my brother and I used to plot to kidnap my mothers plastic Jesus because it embarrassed the snot out of us when we were much much younger.
And somebody actually did kidnap baby Jesus. (Alas, not my mom's baby Jesus, I bet.)
Posted by: Pfish | December 17, 2002 04:08 PM
That article read like something straight out of The Onion! I had to keep double checking to make sure it was really The Trentonian?!
Posted by: Amy | December 17, 2002 04:56 PM