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we have a winner

We have a winner!

Finally, the moment you have all been waiting for.

The winner of the 2002 Pro-Invasion/Get Your War On Jingle Contest is.......

Bill Whittle with his take on Bare Naked Ladies' One Week

It's been
one week since the GOP
took the congress back and said "we're angry"

Five days
I've been watching news
Saddam, man, I'm glad I'm not in YOUR shoes

Three days till you hear the boom
might want board the windows on the bedroom

I sure hoped I'd see
precision strikes against everything Iraqi

Hold on now and watch the French blink
I'm sure that they think
That they have stopped The Cowboy Nation

They're telling us not to fuss, get on their surrender bus
I like the Marines 'cause never lose a battle, man

Like Nagasaki during Last Time
We'll use our nukes prime
Because we're all about value

Fisk will have a bunch of mad fits
He'll try to match wits
You'll have to keep yourself from laughing

Gonna make a break and take that fake
and make that stinkin commie shake
I'd like to kill him, it's the finest of the favours

Gotta see the show, cause then you'll know
That Baathist crap has got to go
Cause it's so dangerous, and we're never gonna waver

How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad

Trying hard not to smile though you feel bad

I'm NOT the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral

Can't understand what I mean?

Well, you soon will

We have a tendency to keep our minds on the job

We have a history of taking no more shit...

Bill will get a prize, though I haven't decided what that prize is yet.

Congratulations, Bill and thank you to all the participants as well as the judges: Stacy, Joe, Lair and Dodd.

I'd like to do more contests, because they are so much fun, but they would have to be for no prizes because I don't want to take an extra job to support my prize-giving habit. And who would enter a contest with no prize except a link? Well, I would. But that's me.


I thought that should be the one, too.


Wow, and i thought constant playlisting and bad cover versions were the main threats of destruction to music i liked.

Nope, it's forced rhyming to squeeze in political discussion. Zack De La Rocha? Come back. All is forgiven...

Hell, it's like watching Bon Jovi covering Bob Dylan. (sigh)...

Hmmm, no mention of Chickity China the Chinese chicken?

Excellent. As I said (in the promised haiku) during the judging:

Canadian band
Better source than Chretién
For nifty chant.

Kudos to the judges. Now we need to get the Bare Naked Ladies on Howard Stern to sing it.