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terror terror everywhere

Terror, terror everywhere..

This is going to end up being a "little boy who cried terror" story. The more terror alerts they issue, the more we ignore them.

Until they make an announcement like "At 1pm on Saturday a terrorist will blow up a bus station in Manhattan. He will be wearing a green jacket and black shoes and will answer to the name of Johnny Bravo," I'll just go on my merry way.

I especially like this vague line:

Other potential targets could include residential areas, clubs, restaurants, places of worship, schools, hotels, outdoor recreation events or resorts and beaches and other facilities where Americans, or foreigners in general, are known to congregate, according to the State Department.

That pretty much lets out being safe anywhere, even under your bed.

I wish the Department of Homeland Security would issue warnings that actually mean something to me. Personalized Terror Alerts that would appear in my email every morning:

Good Morning Michele.

Here is your Personalized Terror Alert for Thursday, November 7, 2002.

  • Your mother is in a bad mood today. Don't go over to her house.
  • Be prepared for an attack of noisy tree removal workers. They will be out in full force with illegal decibel level woodchippers and chainsaws.
  • You are in danger of overdrawing your checking account.
  • Glitter is on Showtime tonight.

Terror Level: 6 out of 10.

Now that would be news I could use.


On another note, Joy is doing a fine job taking on a rather argumentive cretin person in the comments here, but it's worth noting the "discussion" that is going on there. You may want to chime in.

Comments

OMG! That is just way too funny! What a great way to start my day.

Yeah, that would definitely make my life easier. I fear, however, that most of it would be related to EverQuest as I am now hopelessly addicted.

But if they did that, then who would the trial lawyers sue?!?

LOL. Very nice. I think some one should start that email service. I'd sign up! :)

Anyway I found your site quite by accident. I just built a blog function on my site (just released so in the beta stages) and was searching other blog sites.

Anyway very funny stuff.

Right on! I ranted on that one myself, but not nearly as eloquently as you.

By the way, you rock. I've blogrolled you.

Vicky

Right on! I ranted on that one myself, but not nearly as eloquently as you.

By the way, you rock. I've blogrolled you.

Vicky

Pardon me for posting the same comment twice. I got some bizzarro error message the first time, which prompted me to post the second time. Apparently the error message was for naught.