A Small Victory: i got a woody

I'm still working on returning emails. Later on, by popular demand, I will explain how I went from left-leaning to right-handed in less than a year's time.

i got a woody

Oh how I love the smell of idiocy in the morning. And where else to find it, but at Indymedia:

The United States does not have a lawfully elected government. "Our" public servants are bribed and blackmailed by transnational corporations that issue so-called "U.S. dollars" out of nothing. "Elections" are fixed by the "Big Boys" (eg: Bilderberg Group) who own "our" money, "our" media and "our" vote-tabulation machinery. Just say NO to FRAUD, and YES to REAL DEMOCRACY....

Thanks to the miracles of copy and paste, I didn't have to type all those quotation marks.

The choice is ours, and the time is now.
Do you approve of the following nominations for a non-partisan and lawful Administration of the United States? If not, please explain your specific objections and alternative choices. Thank you.

It then lists nominees for each position. I didn't get farther than the first nominee before I was doubled over in laughter:

President - Woody Harrelson

The man who said "The war against terrorism is terrorism. The whole thing is just bullshit."

Doesn't everyone want a president who doesn't want to fight terrorism? Hey, let's just let everyone run naked and free in the streets! Do what you want! We'll all smoke pot and make love and eat organic foods and the world will be full of kitties and fuzzy bunnies and peace and love.

Besides, a president named Woody? And you thought the Bush/Dick jokes were bad. Just wait until the all the hard-on jokes commence.

Comments

Hey Kid...you da bomb. From way up north on the border I'm here to tell you I love your site. I'm a convert too, and I see you discovered what I discovered about the troops protecting your flanks...they ain't real. They're too busy taking each other's temperatures and drinking latte to be real. Tolerance is a one-way muthafucker, so my advice is to just "fuck em all!" I ain't no rightwinger either, but it's sure is a lot of fun pissin 'em off.

bou

Posted by: Anonymous | November 2, 2002 08:15 AM

Anybody can just complain about a problem. In that case, any guy in a bar can become the Leader of the Free World™. I'll consider someone a leader when they offer a SOLID solution to the problem at hand.

Though I think his hemp baseball caps and promotional t-shirts will become collectors items one day...

Posted by: -e- | November 2, 2002 08:17 AM

"kitties and fuzzy bunnies and peace and love"

Yeah, sure would be nice, wouldn't it? I used to feel that way back in my drug-addled youth and still harbor wishes that the world was a more gentle place beneath today's layers of a harsher reality. It's a strange mixture but I'm learning to live with it.

better with images than words...

http://www.dgbn.com/coldmarble/gmarchives/cm_m193ball.jpg

Posted by: john | November 2, 2002 08:45 AM

President named woody
love it
What exactly are Mr. Harrelson's bona fides in relation to governing anyway ?
What is his education ? did he take 2 history classes while going for that drama major ?
not a smart guy
HG

Posted by: Howard | November 2, 2002 09:26 AM

I have to admit that the best political bumpersticker I've ever seen was the "Lick Bush and Dick" one that was everywhere in San Francisco in 2000.
Of course I still voted for Bush, but props for the bumpersticker.

Posted by: Toren | November 2, 2002 09:35 AM

Good Lord, I thought Brandy was joking when I read that. Still, given a choice between Woody and Ed "Could you move? I have to plug my electric car in there" Begley Jr., I pick Woody. Quit looking a me like that.

Posted by: Donna | November 2, 2002 09:43 AM

Well, if I had to choose between "White Men Can't Jump" and "Meet the Applegates" I think Woody would win.

Thank satan I will never be put in that position.

Posted by: michele | November 2, 2002 09:52 AM

I'd love a President who fights the war on terror, as we certainly don't have one, now.

For example, Al-Qaida is reforming in Pakistan, in Karachi. Why aren't we taking them down?

What about bin Laden? Omar? You know, the people who actually attacked the US and brought down the WTC, affecting both of us in personal ways? How does Hussein factor into the pain you've felt because of Sept. 11, Michele?

Simple, he doesn't. Until such a time that the f*ckers who did that are brought to justice -- "Dead or Alive" as the cowboy said -- we're barking up the wrong tree.

Posted by: Scott | November 2, 2002 10:41 AM

Don't "people" know that when THEY put "everything" in quotes AND randomly capitalize words, it "detracts" from WHATEVER they have to say because it's "annoying"?

Posted by: Annette | November 2, 2002 10:50 AM

I heart Annette.

Posted by: Sekimori | November 2, 2002 11:40 AM

Scott, trying to chase down every individual terrorist in the world, is a fool's errand. It's much more effective to cut off their weapons and funding at the sources. Taking Saddam down:

Removes a WMD program that could eventually supply terrorists with really nasty stuff.
Removes a source of funds for terrorist groups, particularly Hamas.
Provides us with a stable military base in the region, one that borders the other major terrorism sponsors.
Undercuts the economies of the other terrorism sponsors, once Iraq's oil fields are back in full production.

Since the Civil War, the US has won wars by out-producing our enemies, and/or disrupting their sources of supply. It's still a strategy that works.

Riyadh delenda est!

Posted by: Cato the Youngest | November 2, 2002 12:23 PM

I hope the world isn't full of fuzzy bunnies. I have allergies, dammit.

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