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by the numbers

by the numbers

bride_groom.jpgWith all the wedding preparation and paranoia, I keep forgetting that I will be turning 40 on the day of my wedding.

Let's forget I mentioned that. I just got depressed.

Amy was kind enough to send me the playlist for her and Jima's wedding. With a list that includes The Pixies, The Ramones, Dead Milkmen and The Jam, it made me realize that a DJ is not required to play Billy Ocean and the chicken dance at a wedding reception.

As a matter of fact, if he plays either that chicken song or asks the party goers to stand up and to the Macarena, I will throw him, and his equipment, into the pool.

Would it be ok to have a mosh pit?

We are not conventional people by any means. Besides the fact that he's 22 and I'll be 40 on the wedding day, we just aren't your standard wedding couple. This isn't your standard wedding. Yesterday we found these bride and groom cake toppers. They were skulls. Cute little skulls decked out in wedding headgear. I'm going back today to purchase them.

We did buy normal rings - white gold bands, pretty plain - but not before looking at rings embossed with daggers and swords and seriously contemplating purchasing them.

We went back and forth on the ideas of wedding favors (Ron, I apologize for being a huge procrastinator and not getting back to you about the candles in time) and we discarded all the ideas for the usual trinkets and almonds that are given at weddings. We are having Pez dispensers. A nice glass bowl on each table, filled with packets of Pez, and Pez dispensers of all kinds at each seat, decorated with a ribbon announcing the nuptials of Michele and Justin.

Back to the playlist - we figure that Slayer is out. We do have to draw the line somewhere and I think that playing Type O Negative's Love You To Death as our theme song is that line.

We'll include a little Motown, a little soul, a little punk, a lot of metal and of course the standard Sinatra and Elvis. And plenty of Nick Cave. We reallly wanted to use The Misfit's Angelfuck as our first dance, but we aren't even having a first dance, and the though of one of my aunts ruining the wedding by having a heart attack as the words "Little Angelfuck, I see you going down on a fireplug, little Angelfuck, size for everyone" come out of the speakers sort of put a damper on the fun of it all.

Enough about the wedding. I'm sure you are all sick of hearing about my nervousness and panic-driven nightmares of the caterer forgetting to show up.

Let's talk about my birthday. I'm turning 40.

No, no I'm not. I'm turning 25, right? RIGHT? Eh, fuck y'all who think I'm supposed to be wearing polyester pants and listening to Barry Manilow while I knit a nice blankie for my toy poodle.

Immaturity runs in my family. In a good way. My dad is still the world's oldest teenager. My mom is obsessed with Pink Floyd. Stay young.

Forever young, I want to be forever young.

Yea, that's the song I was looking for.


i am really only 29. i refuse to accept that i am technically 32. 29 was a good year and thats where i'm staying.
you can be 25 as long as you want.

Forty is beautiful and I hear fifty is even better. Hearty congrats on your wedding.

Wedding PEZ?

That's a new one.

We aren't even using the wedding Pez. We're sticking with Batman, Spiderman and Star Wars. Maybe an ugly clown or two.

For what it's worth, I'm not sick of the wedding banter.

And PEZ? what a great unique idea! I always hate getting little meshies filled with after-dinner-mints anyways.

Love the PEZ idea! Brilliant! And I love the skull cake-toppers! We didn't have a cake (individual key-lime tarts for dessert), but we did have one of these at the reception next to the guest book.

You're not getting old at all, as my Mother says "You are as old as the man you feel" (yes my Mum married a younger man too).

Ohh and Pez = Brilliant!

Forever Young was my prom song.

i turned 40 last month, but the official line is i'm not a day over...hmm...37, maybe. i have it from an official source. my doctor told me i have now "reached the age at which i cease to age." hey, if your DOCTOR tells you that, i figure it's pretty official. right? RIGHT?

I am about to say something that has never before been said by me, though many others certainly have: This sounds like a wedding I'd enjoy attending. It will have a lovely mix of love, insanity, laughs and great music. I hate to admit it, but I'd need a few boxes of tissues. You'll barely have time to think about turning forty, as you'll be too busy overdosing on Pez and reveling in marrying someone who is so great.

I'm envious. I wish I'd though of Pez dispensers as wedding favors. Maybe I need to get married again.

Let's just say its the 11th Anniversary of your 29th birthday.

I love Pez. Can I have one, too?

Actually, I'm wondering what party games you're going to play on your wedding day. I don't know about anyone else out there, but every wedding I've ever attended had some fun and wacky (and usually risque) games that the bride and groom were 'forced' to play. Since your wedding sounds like it's going to be a blast to attend even without any games, I'd be interested in hearing what your friends are planning to do to try to embarrass you.

I just emceed a friends wedding where I made the bride guess which butt belonged to her man. And I made her father be one of the butts!

I think Squirrel Nut Zippers are another band that could appeal to all ages.

Embarass me? I'm getting married by a Judge who thinks he's a stand up comic and my wedding is a roast. That's just for starters.

As far as games go, I think we'll play a drinking game, where everyone has to do a shot whenever someone says "Pez dispensers as favors? Are they fucking nuts?"

You're not your mother's 40, and I won't be my father's 49 that day, either. Besides, no matter what the age, I'm certain you'll make a beautiful bride!

My mom just turned 49, and we both agreed that you're only as old as you feel. I'd never believe my mom was 49 if I met her on the street. You're only old if you let yourself feel that way, and it appears that you definitely aren't.

Odd, my mom dated guys 10-15 years younger than her also. Like you and Gordon's mum. Maybe you need someone with... stamina, to keep up with you. ;)

lol @ The Pez Dispensers Drinking Game. That's quality. Do it.

PEZ dispenser wedding favors??!?! that is the absolutely coolest damn thing! i think i love you ... i KNOW i love PEZ :)

Oh, John! I forgot that we share a birthday! So happy birthday a bit early because I'm sure my head will be elsewhere that morning and I'll forget to say it then.

And a happy wedding birthday to you, too, Michele!