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i am NOT paranoid

I am NOT paranoid

I've been invited to a screening tonight of some new television shows and commercials. They just picked me at random, called me and sent me the tickets in the mail.

They think I'm stupid. I know what they're up to. There's no television show. There aren't any commercials or surveys to note my likes and dislikes. It's a sting.

Operation TIPS has come to get me. I'm going to show up for the screening and some men in black suits and sunglasses are gonna jump up from behind a curtain and shine a bright light in my face and ask me if I am or have I ever been a member of SPORK. They're going to be holding reams of paper with every word I've ever written here printed out on them and they are going to accuse me of being a traitor and a terrorist.

And then they will ask me to name names.

Don't worry. I would never rat out my fellow dissenters. They can torture me with pretzels and pictures of Alan Greenspan in a speedo and I still won't give names or URLs. I'm going to take one for the team.

Then again, maybe it's just a television show screening. But if you don't hear from me for a couple of days, put on your decoder rings and try to track me down, ok?

Comments

For the love of God and all things sacred, NAME ME, WOMAN!

I would so love to be deported. Student loans can finally kiss my ass, honey.

Seriously, feel free to give my name, address, and any pertinent information that may be required for European measurements.

Thanks for the heads up! You may have bought me enough time to tinfoil the windows before they come for me.

But they'll give you free snacks and 50 bucks at the end of the evening. That's worth naming names, right?

if they show you pictures of greenspan in a speedo, i'd totally understand if you cracked under the pressure and named my name.

and now if you'll excuse me, i need to go put out my mind's eye.

Brian, that totally depends on the quality of the snacks served. Unless they offer me margaritas and a huge chocolate cake, my lips are sealed.

I suppose they are too stupid to use your Blogroll.

i'd crack. alan greenspan. speedo. shudder

Just in case it really is a television screening, you'd better spill the dirt, pronto!

And would you please frickin' email me?

you know they are going to show you the dick cheney nude video, and after that the names will come tumbling.

But it's OK - you can name me - I have my own private militia just waiting to bust them bildeberg asses.

I will email you next week after my weekendtraining camp - first we take the nina simone cds, and then we take the world.

I'm with James. I'm all for getting out of the country.

But if it seems like deportation is eminent, let me know, and I'll start running up some good ol American debt.

You know, the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers (I heart the shooting script more than chocolate covered cherries. The movie is good, too.) is on dvd now. It helps to rinse the t.v. focus group residue away.

Ooh, for margaritas and chocolate cake, I would make up names just for them.

Ditto the others regarding Alan G. in a speedo...where do you come up with these images? Bleah!

Ditto the others regarding Alan G. in a speedo...where do you come up with these images? Bleah!

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Hello. If you are owner of this site, delete this message, please.

bairontechnologiesforall
bairontechnologiesforall
http://www.bairontechnologiesforall.biz

Hello. If you are owner of this site, delete this message, please.

bairontechnologiesforall
bairontechnologiesforall
http://www.bairontechnologiesforall.biz