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I'm in a hormonal rage today. It's going to be a race between me and my sister Lisa to see who takes a life first.

There are several people already on my shit list. All of them are strangers who have in some way irritated me beyond reason. I'm sure it's better to kill a stranger than a relative, though. If you kill a relative then no one brings you cigarettes and porn while you're rotting away in jail.

It's only 11am and I have spilled coffee all over my shirt, my hair is doing the humidity dance, I have cramps that would kill most men, I've already gone through a box of tampons, my other sister just accused me of blowing the system admin guy so I could get an internet connection, and yes, that really is COFFEE on my shirt.

Don't even think of looking at me wrong today. And should you see Lisa and I together at any point in the next three or four days, I suggest you run like mad because when the two of us are in a cycle-induced mood we make Saddam look like Mary Fucking Poppins.

Comments

Magic 8 Ball said "It is Certain" that I will kill someone today. My solution: Go home at lunch, gear up the PS2, play a round of Grand Theft Auto 3. I highly recommend it for those PMS days. The hard part is separating myself from it when I get back into my own car. I say "No, Lisa, you cannot pull that bitch out of her car, run her over, then drive away leaving her on the street. Just beep and give her the finger."

you cannot pull that bitch out of her car, run her over, then drive away leaving her on the street

Oh, NOW you tell me!

Girlfriend,
I feel your pain. I was on this same rampage on Monday and Tuesday. Happy to be on the other side of it. As are my family and friends, i'm sure. The sisterhood is with you.

Oh it can't be that bad can it?
Hmm yeah ok it can. Try going 2 weeks never sleeping more than 2 hrs at a time

Another advantage of "maturity"--the ability to happily thumb one's nose at the Feminine Products aisle. This beats the 25 cent drinks at BK and McD and $2 off at the movies.

Chuck, been there done that. It's called insomnia.

I'll post your bail if you'll return the favor. I just made the woman at UPS cry. You know those few PMS days every month should be holidays. It would be safer for everyone involved.

when my sisters and i have 'collective PMS', we tend to really bitch on whichever person is not in the room with us at the time... and this is usually our mother.

:::maniacal laughter:::

Whoa! Your pms sounds as bad as mine. I'm here via Kat. I look forward to coming back soon and looking around a bit more.