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i wanna be sedated

i wanna be sedated

Bush to give power to Cheney while he undergoes colonoscopy.

I'm not even going there. I'm sure you can come up with enough jokes on your own.

Best one liner regarding this story receives some kind of prize from me. Use the comments.

Kids are gone. Vacation from hell is winding down. I'm going to get piss drunk and write all my senators tonight.

Posted by on June 28, 2002 06:00 PM |

Comments

He'll take it back if the operation succeeds in finding his brain.

Posted by: Muad'Dib | June 28, 2002 06:32 PM

What if Cheney has another heart attack tomorrow?

More to the point, sedation for colonoscopy includes an amnesiac, which USUALLY wears off in 24 hours--but the amount of time it linger can vary. Would that be an advantage or a disadvantage?

Posted by: sue | June 28, 2002 08:51 PM

"What if Cheney has another heart attack tomorrow?"

Then Colon Powell would be in power. So this would simply be a colon swap.

Did I just type that?

Posted by: Kevin | June 28, 2002 10:26 PM

we're in deep sh*t now!

Posted by: The Dynamic Driveler | June 29, 2002 01:45 AM

Well, I think it's fairly obvious what's going on . . .

You know how puppets basically have some guy shoved part way up their ass who enables them to talk, move, and generally appear somewhat real?

Well, in order to perform the colonoscopy, they will clearly have to extract Dick from Bush's ass. (I assure you, that is not nearly as sexy as it sounds.)

While he's out, they have to give him something to do.

Think about it . . . Cheney keeps going into hiding. Now we know where.

Posted by: William Ted | June 29, 2002 03:32 AM

think about what would happen if something goes wrong and bush gets killed. has an allergic reaction to the anesthesia. maybe cheney finally loses it from all that time in the bunkers and botches the procedure.

think about that.

i think that would be the most bloody fucking ironic thing in the universe.

and i would go outside and laugh until i fell over and passed out, because i would realize that indeed, the universe does has a sense of humour. a sick, demented four year old's sense of it, but a sense none the less.

gives new meaning to "getting caught with your pants around your ankles," eh?

Posted by: josh | June 29, 2002 04:08 AM

Is it wrong to pray for that election-year-zero curse to hold water? I guess I'm already goin' to hell anyway...

Posted by: robyn | June 29, 2002 04:14 AM

The "zero curse" probably got cancelled when Reagan survived the assassination attempt. (And, it didn't start till 1840 and William Henry Harrison talked too long at his inauguration.)

Posted by: sue | June 29, 2002 07:15 AM

i'm thinking cheney will refuse to give power back to Bush when it's over. "Hah! No! You can't have your office back! It's mine! And you have to do what I say because I'm PRESIDENT, dammit!"

Posted by: Emily | June 29, 2002 08:59 AM

Now George, says Laura, I told you not to g o sitting on them oil rigs.

Posted by: g | June 29, 2002 10:26 AM

I have mental images of Cheney wielding a pen in both hands in the Oval Office, raising his face to the ceiling and yelling out "I have the power!!!" just like He-Man.

Posted by: Keith | June 29, 2002 12:57 PM

Keith, I had written a post JUST LIKE THAT! It had skeletor and everything. A stupid mistake on my part (X means close window, dummy) lost the whole thing. Would have been funny.

Posted by: michele | June 29, 2002 01:25 PM

What should we be more concerned with: The shit in Bush's ass or the shit coming out of Cheney's mouth?

Posted by: Eric | June 29, 2002 10:21 PM

One month later, President Bush was found naked, in a field with some mutilated cows.

"The last thing I remember is hearing the words 'You're my bitch now.'"

Posted by: led | June 30, 2002 01:44 AM

Dick I told you Ossama wasn't hiding up there.

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