death fantasies
death fantasies
Did you ever suddenly stop in your tracks and say "Holy shit, some day I'm not going to be here anymore!"?
I do that often. It creeps up on me out of nowhere, the realization that someday, I am going to die. And I'm ok with that, really. It's not like I can keep it from happening. But I find myself obsessing about not when I'm going to kick the bucket, but how.
Like most people, I would prefer to die peacefully in my sleep of old age. Ok, I don't want the old age thing if it includes Depends, a full-time nurse and an oxygen tent. I want that kind of sweet old age thing, where we go to bed at 9:00 one night and I take my last breath while dreaming of the wonderful day we just had. Just die right there, in the arms of my husband. Yea, not so great for him. But, hey, I'm dead. It's not my problem that he woke up cuddling a stiff, cold wife. This is my fantasy.
I don't want to go out in a fashion that would get me nominated for a Darwin award. With my luck, I'll somehow get my head stuck in a drain. And I don't want to make the cover of the local paper with a story that will turn into an urban legend someday. Woman killed by line drive at Little League game. Woman falls off table while doing tequila-induced strip tease at her wedding. That sort of thing.
I'm sure dying right after sex, maybe in the throes of an earth-shattering orgasm, would be a fine way to go. My family may never live it down, but the funeral director wouldn't have to worry about getting me to look at peace. With my luck, I'll die that way, but it will be one of those times when I'm wearing the french maid's outfit or a strap-on.
I'd rather not die violently. And who does, except for those people who go to the school of Death by Martyrdom and Explosives? But if I do go out that way, I prefer that it's in a blaze of glory. Maybe saving adorable school children from a burning bus or going down in a hail of gunfire after I try to choke Ashcroft to death.
You could spend all night laying in bed with eyes wide open, devising new and interesting ways to die. You could lay there like me, staring into the dark and imaging your car submerged in a muddy lake, or feeling the burning winds of a nuclear blast or a stun gun mishap at the hands of the FBI. You could dream up a million ways to die, and realize that no amount of planning can keep you from the fate that awaits you. I've heard of cardiac doctors dying of heart attacks. Or twisted fate stories like the health conscious fitness instructor getting hit by a car while jogging. The woman who sruvived a plane crash only to slip in the shower and crack her head open the following week. The man who survived a brain tumor only to be killed by his deranged neighbor over a borrowed lawn mower.
I accept the fact that I will die. I accept the fact that it will probably not be my fantasy death of peace and happiness, just dropping dead one day while I'm 90 years old, reading a comic book in my rocking chair. I just don't want it to be gruesome or embarassing to my family. Maybe I should lay off the tequila at my wedding.
How do you envision your death?
Comments
I don't.
No point tempting fate.
To be honest, though, I'm honestly not afraid of death -- I'm just afraid of all that can lead up to it. I was almost killed in a car accident years ago, and it really was awfully peaceful. Not frightening at all.
Death doesn't scare me. Old age scares me plenty.
Posted by: JD | April 30, 2002 05:51 AM
Given that in traffic reports I hear the words, "...a car versus a motorcycle, right lane is blocked..." at least three times a day, odds are I'll die because someone changed lanes without looking. However mostly I imagine myself dying by taking risks in old age because I can afford them moreso than when I'm young.
Your post gives me a business idea. Publishing blogs into coffee table books, upon the death of their authors. "a small victory. Life and tumultuous times of M.C. (i.e. hell raiser)" for all your descendents to remember you by.
Posted by: chris | April 30, 2002 06:20 AM
Alone.
Posted by: Eeksy-Peeksy | April 30, 2002 06:51 AM
Hopefully as quick and painless as possible..
I am such a wuss..
Posted by: Jen | April 30, 2002 07:16 AM
Pushing the button that takes us all out. If I'm going, I'm taking every one of you with me...
Posted by: oliverj | April 30, 2002 07:20 AM
I like oliverj's comment. I don't think about death, except when I'm angry and contemplating murder/suicide. Luckily, I'm not crazy, and the feeling passes quickly. I expect to live forever.
Posted by: JEfromCanada | April 30, 2002 09:33 AM
i suspect i'll die under mysterious circumstances after living a widow's life for 20 years in a house full of cats.
Posted by: bran-O-phelia | April 30, 2002 10:06 AM
Like this. Or cancer.
Posted by: amyc | April 30, 2002 10:47 AM
I'll probably die sitting at my computer, typing a comment on somebodies...
Posted by: wKen | April 30, 2002 11:35 AM
Smiling.
Posted by: Peanut Gallery | April 30, 2002 12:40 PM
Toaster, Bathtub, Voila! Burn't Bent
Posted by: EB | April 30, 2002 01:14 PM
I picture myself slowly withering away in a chaise lounge in my italian villa surrounded by young, beautiful, italian houseboys. Of course, in reality, I will probably die of cancer or heart disease in a cold, lonely hospital bed.
Posted by: TJ | April 30, 2002 05:18 PM
You know how you can be dozing out on the lawn or in a comfy chair and suddenly you are jerked awake by something, some dream/vision or a noise? I am always jerked awake by a vision of falling down stairs and knowing that the landing is going to be fatal. Every single time. Therefore it is my belief that I'm going to be killed by stairs. Makes living on the third floor interesting....
Posted by: Cleo | April 30, 2002 06:41 PM
it'll be either my lungs or my liver. and it probably won't be much fun. or very quickly.
Posted by: kd | April 30, 2002 07:22 PM
too much ultra-violence.
Posted by: melly | April 30, 2002 09:33 PM
Mattie should have been named Chuckie, eh?
Posted by: michele | April 30, 2002 10:15 PM
Car wreck, I figure. The way my grandparents keep living and living, it looks I have no shot at a natural death.
Though maybe karma will catch up with this generation of the family, who knows? Maybe I can look forward to a nice, leisurely, cancer-ridden death.
Posted by: space | April 30, 2002 11:16 PM
Can I join you in that hail of gunfire after the assault on Ashcroft?
Posted by: Linkmeister | May 1, 2002 03:44 AM
Shadowy government assasination. You know that you've lived a rich and memorable life if you merit that.
Posted by: Guy Parsons | May 4, 2002 02:34 PM
I'm gonna die one of 3 ways:
Lung cancer, Liver Damage or a Heart attack....
Posted by: Anonymous | March 9, 2003 04:06 PM
Hopefully I'll work up the courage to kill myself before I'm claimed by some terrible fate.
Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.
- Dorothy Parker
Posted by: one-eyed child | September 5, 2003 08:26 PM
i don't want the unexpected kind of death. i had no say in when or how or to whom i was born to. it's only fair i control the latter half.
Posted by: Joanna | October 5, 2003 11:27 PM
Just let me know when you can think of a quick, painless non-messy way.
Posted by: Sunny | October 6, 2003 09:32 AM
Vivid DVD - Vivid Porn - Vivid Girls - Vivid Entertainment - Vivid Girl - Vivid Video - Sexo - Sexo Gratis - Fotos de Sexo - Sexo Duro - Huge Big Tits - Black Bros White Hoes - Traci Lord - Jill Kelly - Kendra Jade - Amber Lynn - Nude Pictures - Ass Porn - Barely Legal
Toni Freeland - Monster Cock - Online Casino - Sexo Anal - Ginger Lynn - Adult DVD - Cheap DVD - AdultChatNetwork - Online Poker - Sexo Gratis - Sex Porn - Porn Star - Sex Movie - Aria Giovanni - Tawnee Stone - Danni Ashe
Thanks for Visit my New Sites Guys.
Posted by: Sex Porn | November 5, 2003 01:20 PM
Gay Male Porn - Chasey Lain - Internet Casino - Online Casino - Alley Bagget - Evidence Eliminator - Adult Movie - Drew Barrymore - Adriana Sage - Hustler Magazine - Teen Steam - Sexo Interracial - Sexo Oral - Asian Porn - Big Tit - Kara Adult Playground - Porn Video
Adult Video - Free Sex - Brittany Andrew - Kobe Tai - Fat Woman - Sexo Gay - Nikki Tyler - Jenna Jameson - Silvia Saint - Petra Verkaik - Hustler - Adult Chat Network - Amateur Porn - Anal Porn - Black Woman - Adele Stephens - Alexus Winston
wow, this Blog is really Good.
Posted by: Tawnee Stone | November 5, 2003 01:20 PM
photos obese free plumper pics bbw pics bbw butt large tits obese porno large intestines bbw art bbw texas fat obese women free plumper thumbs free fat girl plump anal fat women sex hardcore bbw plump nude girls fat naked plumper teens free plumper gallery large model bbw wives bbw bhm large format scanner large and lovely bbw wrestling plump sexy bbw lesbians bbw movie forum plump pictures supersize bbw buxom ladies bbw fuck large teen plump girls plumper fucking plump bbw forum large sex bbw personal bbw post plump asian plump busty obese women porn bbw wives plump tits nude plump obese photos free black bbw bbw porn big n plump naked obese big buxom obese ladies amateur plump free plump teen tinaf bbw bbw thumbnail free plumper pics mercedes bbw bbw escorts obese women pics fat milk free plump porn movies plump anal plump thumbs bbw erotic asian plump erotic bbw bbw galleries free plump porn fat obese women plump wife bbw top 100 obese photos obese overweight plump teens tgp
Posted by: plump ladies | November 6, 2004 10:04 AM
free porn star pictures free porn star celebrity nudes rocco porn star nude celebrity porn star mpegs porn star gauge porn star free pics janine porn star porn star guage porn star pic celebrity fake nude nude celebrity archive jeremy porn star playboy celebrity gauge porn star porn star health celebrity hot free porn star gallery porn star anna porn star escorts porn star hiv german porn star french porn star female porn star becoming a porn star porn star serenity porn star interview asian porn star www porn star com porn star health your porn star name porn star savannah star porn porn star clothing porn star picture russian porn star houston the porn star nude porn star lesbian porn star german porn star want to be a porn star www porn star com porn star t shirts porn star news porn star nude celebrity cruises porn star escorts porn star bio latin porn star how to be a porn star porn star sites porn star friday porn star biographies porn star guage british porn star asian porn star porn star clothes india porn star india porn star italian porn star porn star index hardcore celebrity candy samples porn star porn star devon blonde porn star german porn star celebrity pictures ron jeremy porn star belladonna porn star porn star escorts free porn star pictures porn star hardcore black porn star i want to be a porn star
Posted by: trinity porn star | November 6, 2004 11:24 PM
highest quality replica jewelry Rolex watch, wrist watch, Replica Watch purchase your affordable realistic Rolex replica watch today at http://www.pro-rolex-replica-watches.com
Posted by: Rolex Replica | November 7, 2004 01:30 AM
free hardcore sex galleries fuck wav chloe jones hardcore hardcore teen girls fucked by horses suck fuck fucked boy 2 fuck young hardcore chloe jones hardcore fuck pics girls fucked hard hardcore sex stories big tits fucked big tits fucked post hardcore free tit fuck ways to fuck outdoor fuck sexy fuck post hardcore fuck shit max hardcore dawn mckenzie hardcore musica hardcore hardcore thumbnail granny hardcore fist fucked hardcore lesbian free fuck movies getting fucked hard hardcore thumbnail free fuck videos fuck rape wives fucked fresh fucked granny fuck crazy fucked up boys being fucked fuck movies fuck shit piss tawnee stone hardcore free hardcore sex pics fat fucked hardcore free pics brianna banks fucked daily hardcore outdoor fuck collage fuck hardcore thumbnails hardcore teens fucking hardcore free hardcore mpegs all fucked up fotos hardcore foot fuck asian fucked free hardcore pics fuck pussy hardcore black fuck song girl being fucked fuck bitch free tit fuck fuck you fuck me fuck free pics kids fuck devon hardcore fuck toy hardcore pics free gauge fucked anime fuck fresh fucked free fuck videos 2 hardcore
Posted by: tits hardcore | November 7, 2004 10:41 PM
web cam chat sites live chat sites web cam's video chat sexy city web cam web cam porno free live chat cams web cam porno peekshows chat live chatrooms live nude chat free web cam sites live chat girls free live chat sex web cam reviews video chat programm web cam server teen web cam pics online web cam free live nude video chat live web cam world web cam cam live chat site web cam web cam photos hot web cam live sex video chat peekshow live chat live chat room city web cam adult web cam community chat with web cam live chat cams java video chat web cam world adult video chat free live chat room free live chat cams video chat sexo free video chat adult video chat free web cam sexy video chat site web cam ny live girls chat webcams chat web cam girls web cam de sexo chat cams live chat lines xxx live video chat web cam porno gratis online live chat chats webcams web cam sexo peekshows chat web cam go plus chat and video sexcam chat live chatroom adult video chat free web cam home live sex chat free web cam sites free teen web cam world web cam live chats gratis live chat livecam chat free teen web cam girl talk video chat with web cam web cam movies cams chat web cam free sex
Posted by: web cam live | November 9, 2004 06:49 PM
shion super taboo taboo adult free incest taboo super taboo anime free super taboo manga ilegal tgp taboo night club taboo films taboo cartoon incest taboo chat room taboo forum forbidden erotic stories taboo platinum edition family taboo stories taboo story taboo atlanta forbidden movie black taboo video forbidden erotic stories taboo game mother taboo download taboo pelicula taboo forbidden fuck ilegal fotos dark taboo com prohibited sex taboo jpg www taboo free super taboo free taboo incest forbidden boys taboo board oriental taboo taboo montreal incest taboo chat german taboo trailer stories incest taboo sex stories taboo ilegal movies taboo trailer taboo mom and son roshi super taboo mother son incest taboo board game taboo erotic stories taboo free taboo incest taboo london taboo junior super taboo jpg taboo games incest taboo com ilegal net mom son taboo taboo sex story taboo world taboo resort oriental taboo smut taboo forbidden sex incest taboo chatroom mother son incest taboo forbidden gardens dark taboo com forbidden tgp forbidden gardens taboo mpegs incest taboo chat german taboo fiction forbidden movie the venue taboo taboo 2 dvd taboo bbs free super taboo manga forbidden pics
Posted by: taboo free pics | November 14, 2004 07:34 PM